tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11655763072546767412024-01-17T02:35:16.383-05:00The Rasta Family......x6I have learned to be content whatever the cicumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plent or living in want. I can do everything thru HIM that gives me strength. Phillippians 4:11-13Janahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17681902597194726962noreply@blogger.comBlogger657125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1165576307254676741.post-28307312552200440682016-09-04T13:11:00.003-04:002016-09-04T13:17:56.055-04:00Evolve<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiyloU8olSEHKggvnuZrlMDxxz4SzvupuyTR0caqg3tOFjL5NlIrzPHxj6nCdgARMf4SM1-vAoAqXq5aZjEi64QLN8AZIhJm4GrPIM0tEYTSul-aOOna5jLFwSl5GZTtdsnb_G4pU9Z7dVA/s1600/IMG_5626.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiyloU8olSEHKggvnuZrlMDxxz4SzvupuyTR0caqg3tOFjL5NlIrzPHxj6nCdgARMf4SM1-vAoAqXq5aZjEi64QLN8AZIhJm4GrPIM0tEYTSul-aOOna5jLFwSl5GZTtdsnb_G4pU9Z7dVA/s400/IMG_5626.jpg" width="265" /></a></div>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #1d2129; font-family: "raleway" , sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px; text-align: justify;">I try and shoot creatively for me a couple times a month.</span><br />
<br style="background-color: white; color: #1d2129; font-family: Raleway, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px; text-align: justify;" />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #1d2129; font-family: "raleway" , sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px; text-align: justify;">When I envision a session in my head...it is usually a story line of some sorts.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #1d2129; font-family: "raleway" , sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px; text-align: justify;">It usually has to do with something that has affected me or something that I have gone thru.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #1d2129; font-family: "raleway" , sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px; text-align: justify;">Alot of times its not boudoir. Its more of an artistic, fine art session.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #1d2129; font-family: "raleway" , sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px; text-align: justify;">Less sex appeal...more story. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #1d2129; font-family: "raleway" , sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px; text-align: justify;">This session was inspired by changes that we all go thru in life.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #1d2129; font-family: "raleway" , sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px; text-align: justify;">It is inspired by the fact that in life...we evolve.</span><br />
<br style="background-color: white; color: #1d2129; font-family: Raleway, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px; text-align: justify;" />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #1d2129; font-family: "raleway" , sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px; text-align: justify;">If we are really living and really paying attention...we will change. </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #1d2129; font-family: "raleway" , sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px; text-align: justify;">We will transform from one thing to another...</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #1d2129; font-family: "raleway" , sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px; text-align: justify;">Sometimes it is a quick painless change...</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #1d2129; font-family: "raleway" , sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px; text-align: justify;">Other times-</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #1d2129; font-family: "raleway" , sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px; text-align: justify;">mucky</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #1d2129; font-family: "raleway" , sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px; text-align: justify;">dirty</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #1d2129; font-family: "raleway" , sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px; text-align: justify;">uncomfortable</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #1d2129; font-family: "raleway" , sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px; text-align: justify;">messy</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #1d2129; font-family: "raleway" , sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px; text-align: justify;">and hard</span><br />
<br style="background-color: white; color: #1d2129; font-family: Raleway, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px; text-align: justify;" />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #1d2129; font-family: "raleway" , sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px; text-align: justify;">We have to crumble to build..... </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #1d2129; font-family: "raleway" , sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px; text-align: justify;">That is the beauty of life.</span><br />
<br style="background-color: white; color: #1d2129; font-family: Raleway, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px; text-align: justify;" />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #1d2129; font-family: "raleway" , sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px; text-align: justify;">In those moments...</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #1d2129; font-family: "raleway" , sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px; text-align: justify;">we have choices.</span><br />
<br style="background-color: white; color: #1d2129; font-family: Raleway, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px; text-align: justify;" />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #1d2129; font-family: "raleway" , sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px; text-align: justify;">We can choose to stay there and sink in it...</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #1d2129; font-family: "raleway" , sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px; text-align: justify;">OR</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #1d2129; font-family: "raleway" , sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px; text-align: justify;">We rise and come clean.</span><br />
<br style="background-color: white; color: #1d2129; font-family: Raleway, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px; text-align: justify;" />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #1d2129; font-family: "raleway" , sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px; text-align: justify;">We have to choose to shed and change...</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #1d2129; font-family: "raleway" , sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px; text-align: justify;">We have to choose to see the light inside of ourselves.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #1d2129; font-family: "raleway" , sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px; text-align: justify;">We have to relish in the mud and growth.</span><br />
<br style="background-color: white; color: #1d2129; font-family: Raleway, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px; text-align: justify;" />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #1d2129; font-family: "raleway" , sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px; text-align: justify;">Because-</span><br />
<br style="background-color: white; color: #1d2129; font-family: Raleway, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px; text-align: justify;" />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #1d2129; font-family: "raleway" , sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px; text-align: justify;">Without the pain...there is no pleasure.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #1d2129; font-family: "raleway" , sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px; text-align: justify;">Without the hurt..there is no healing.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #1d2129; font-family: "raleway" , sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px; text-align: justify;">Without the mess...there is no truth.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #1d2129; font-family: "raleway" , sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px; text-align: justify;">Without the old..there is no new. </span><br />
<br style="background-color: white; color: #1d2129; font-family: Raleway, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px; text-align: justify;" />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #1d2129; font-family: "raleway" , sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px; text-align: justify;">Make a choice.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #1d2129; font-family: "raleway" , sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px; text-align: justify;"> </span><br />
<div class="" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #1d2129; font-family: "raleway" , sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px; text-align: justify;">Rise.</span><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg-fQnIIB5e5-KRx-jCQ8PCRevee66lXL2L4ce2eWZ8zMDkh6OOOC1g_qX9PbZP6zWPXKTwTUCAVDaaHDhI2KuPSA_dbA7cYCClk2TSbM_gzjKQ5PMd9vk_RuD51VZY1M-u5NzOO6HPfYvw/s1600/IMG_5641.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg-fQnIIB5e5-KRx-jCQ8PCRevee66lXL2L4ce2eWZ8zMDkh6OOOC1g_qX9PbZP6zWPXKTwTUCAVDaaHDhI2KuPSA_dbA7cYCClk2TSbM_gzjKQ5PMd9vk_RuD51VZY1M-u5NzOO6HPfYvw/s400/IMG_5641.jpg" width="265" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgxVyREv1kuOcnVZeGD9-BNWJD2cJlHqQN4Y8acA7OIqRvgP4UI5AiPrqJlNMxNB50J04-LTM_kHcVSKsTojTKghsbZ2zMOYPD8CRp6LRQ7o1cxKhSAT3WEgtc5WAtWLAdX3MbbjF4zz0RJ/s1600/IMG_5669+-+Copy.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgxVyREv1kuOcnVZeGD9-BNWJD2cJlHqQN4Y8acA7OIqRvgP4UI5AiPrqJlNMxNB50J04-LTM_kHcVSKsTojTKghsbZ2zMOYPD8CRp6LRQ7o1cxKhSAT3WEgtc5WAtWLAdX3MbbjF4zz0RJ/s400/IMG_5669+-+Copy.jpg" width="266" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjU2-9HvapoUEljx6UwrlC_o3-_e-g3EKGxWVZHudRp5OvMM6MfuPHCi24dJzPcBJp_pyBByeJsAOHMt_6PEBbxTPtshGeT8WBe3_7B-i830tlL5EcE7JrTQCufGZFIWFoQolWl_nOGX7Li/s1600/IMG_5654+-+Copy.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="266" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjU2-9HvapoUEljx6UwrlC_o3-_e-g3EKGxWVZHudRp5OvMM6MfuPHCi24dJzPcBJp_pyBByeJsAOHMt_6PEBbxTPtshGeT8WBe3_7B-i830tlL5EcE7JrTQCufGZFIWFoQolWl_nOGX7Li/s400/IMG_5654+-+Copy.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjn67RtciMs21Jf4X2NnlNU-g50fXdymcfqk6ex0ZF6R9tKWEokJMMI2ZZJ03J1d6xpOkQ_TKvofGOLWuF5EPhepZerUT78sg5VgNpcT2cYdUxkOgjEjR7KDvvHcKLhJnFDC7Xd8_Hk5BJN/s1600/IMG_5682+-+Copy.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="266" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjn67RtciMs21Jf4X2NnlNU-g50fXdymcfqk6ex0ZF6R9tKWEokJMMI2ZZJ03J1d6xpOkQ_TKvofGOLWuF5EPhepZerUT78sg5VgNpcT2cYdUxkOgjEjR7KDvvHcKLhJnFDC7Xd8_Hk5BJN/s400/IMG_5682+-+Copy.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjSBIPCQIGzMT3pG13KTDVv6smvz04iu6VXTz0xpbhLdpEgWApTuEdLMZyBqF_rQeBa5A33gE2mOe_fNEFb5dVlcTBBgcEpVA4rKLubXO56Ik_9oGxqLn8Mh_FEsoqxXhxW69uizTdKdzNT/s1600/IMG_5689+-+Copy.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="266" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjSBIPCQIGzMT3pG13KTDVv6smvz04iu6VXTz0xpbhLdpEgWApTuEdLMZyBqF_rQeBa5A33gE2mOe_fNEFb5dVlcTBBgcEpVA4rKLubXO56Ik_9oGxqLn8Mh_FEsoqxXhxW69uizTdKdzNT/s400/IMG_5689+-+Copy.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhSD4Hoqw8UW0wVA9_8XmeaFRS8D7bKQ07b3IrIkXG5DuCAeQlGF-3opuvHFfnwnMPAwSIT9qqeQPWtwgPB0rOo7uWoNHXTl0KFXDaibOnBFSJUsuyv_L2bm95pQUQziJ3vXkGz0VIqmWvL/s1600/IMG_5697.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="266" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhSD4Hoqw8UW0wVA9_8XmeaFRS8D7bKQ07b3IrIkXG5DuCAeQlGF-3opuvHFfnwnMPAwSIT9qqeQPWtwgPB0rOo7uWoNHXTl0KFXDaibOnBFSJUsuyv_L2bm95pQUQziJ3vXkGz0VIqmWvL/s400/IMG_5697.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgwrp-9J34efumhcYJ9U0JIZVHYCovisApDpUl1_btwYwlX23OoTY_c_7shZ58-svrRK6HQlglyXHCpRNMZv5aPYtxRFjV6MOqeaPZi_dRyJk0pTc0cDk01YIcZML_8aP5lJkFYxtdtyO8e/s1600/IMG_5722+-+Copy.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="266" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgwrp-9J34efumhcYJ9U0JIZVHYCovisApDpUl1_btwYwlX23OoTY_c_7shZ58-svrRK6HQlglyXHCpRNMZv5aPYtxRFjV6MOqeaPZi_dRyJk0pTc0cDk01YIcZML_8aP5lJkFYxtdtyO8e/s400/IMG_5722+-+Copy.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiNo7q6yDTfMX0kbc47V2QRMI2tY1gj2VaSt0ZOCphUsR6vK0VCATIiFT02rjMRhGqVcsTBaEzxvPg-JGNO9dxOeg53EZdmLopGVKBqqbMcOt_ZUaWAxzlSzEGGy5orJP8MgaxE8axCDpMg/s1600/IMG_5731+-+Copy.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiNo7q6yDTfMX0kbc47V2QRMI2tY1gj2VaSt0ZOCphUsR6vK0VCATIiFT02rjMRhGqVcsTBaEzxvPg-JGNO9dxOeg53EZdmLopGVKBqqbMcOt_ZUaWAxzlSzEGGy5orJP8MgaxE8axCDpMg/s400/IMG_5731+-+Copy.jpg" width="266" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi3RUSNEZwy9rGQFEPhIMSN33_3AfraP7x5q3DPeFCBvmt3Bi_ien22cTkwCsa-53WZ9WdLOYqqkCncru5y9dhZXPXZpYDJINbh-gbdKvBeh1LYfgfok0slgxrAzcPRkeg2LiQ9_5jpIXNk/s1600/IMG_5740.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="266" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi3RUSNEZwy9rGQFEPhIMSN33_3AfraP7x5q3DPeFCBvmt3Bi_ien22cTkwCsa-53WZ9WdLOYqqkCncru5y9dhZXPXZpYDJINbh-gbdKvBeh1LYfgfok0slgxrAzcPRkeg2LiQ9_5jpIXNk/s400/IMG_5740.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjzBWqPxN-2LdAyxcAkuF64H4al50vjm7pPisz3PqdSWWs8PehoxEpyEaz96dFcLjWrpA-jgwv1Cq_8SSfuh_vZ4DdK0HrLpYbYJN51Cjbj_N-ZcgGRpsgPKP4IdmltFDiomXi3l4q54f-8/s1600/IMG_5749.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjzBWqPxN-2LdAyxcAkuF64H4al50vjm7pPisz3PqdSWWs8PehoxEpyEaz96dFcLjWrpA-jgwv1Cq_8SSfuh_vZ4DdK0HrLpYbYJN51Cjbj_N-ZcgGRpsgPKP4IdmltFDiomXi3l4q54f-8/s640/IMG_5749.jpg" width="426" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjDSCFJoGia3qKL1760ADUAHeu_suz5ZBOVGxkehgLT56KItupE9DsW7tS6BWd5Rb9Ju-oyvT4GzKZeVmJOkwY4cWlogKGm78KPjZJvfbdfMfcS19yX6XROBqKKHRrx7Ic6M86REI-S7mWg/s1600/IMG_5762+-+Copy.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="266" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjDSCFJoGia3qKL1760ADUAHeu_suz5ZBOVGxkehgLT56KItupE9DsW7tS6BWd5Rb9Ju-oyvT4GzKZeVmJOkwY4cWlogKGm78KPjZJvfbdfMfcS19yX6XROBqKKHRrx7Ic6M86REI-S7mWg/s400/IMG_5762+-+Copy.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjSAA91lpf67LRZn_sQlUq1y0Hlm7I7JQRd1Dpe1iHR8fQsoVgNz3grfnt-Fx3feJ5fsAI4iiJRd-KWkRX6qtGqCymXdTbaRfkZJAKQSOX9Jlk5n9LP1gREp88pvXUGsARPQPuKCfhNf5i1/s1600/IMG_5768.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="266" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjSAA91lpf67LRZn_sQlUq1y0Hlm7I7JQRd1Dpe1iHR8fQsoVgNz3grfnt-Fx3feJ5fsAI4iiJRd-KWkRX6qtGqCymXdTbaRfkZJAKQSOX9Jlk5n9LP1gREp88pvXUGsARPQPuKCfhNf5i1/s400/IMG_5768.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgqh-qKiBWXhykZdD3r-Lj32Ucda-XLcoZF65Apsymfz93IPWwcOvffYjMUs9G2cTONVOQUsfe3cI_XYrh-bkSsluh9Gz4jQNvvTASZCU-j0uNyt422NLOOI5Qt61yzPFq7GteqExDW3_Fp/s1600/IMG_5772.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgqh-qKiBWXhykZdD3r-Lj32Ucda-XLcoZF65Apsymfz93IPWwcOvffYjMUs9G2cTONVOQUsfe3cI_XYrh-bkSsluh9Gz4jQNvvTASZCU-j0uNyt422NLOOI5Qt61yzPFq7GteqExDW3_Fp/s400/IMG_5772.jpg" width="266" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjbs8xv-aqBNFy0el9HdaaF8FbMDVvrV0Kq23RrzyY1vlOvByR-aa8O12VUIzAoPvqjaxffV22we80DELTtoc7bqYgrjH6cJdFptv7u3podKI5oZ-MRK4Z2lbOGKYdCC7iYEwYszj5h_PUG/s1600/IMG_5776-Edit.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="266" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjbs8xv-aqBNFy0el9HdaaF8FbMDVvrV0Kq23RrzyY1vlOvByR-aa8O12VUIzAoPvqjaxffV22we80DELTtoc7bqYgrjH6cJdFptv7u3podKI5oZ-MRK4Z2lbOGKYdCC7iYEwYszj5h_PUG/s400/IMG_5776-Edit.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjWA74n5DyPVOE3tzdyknHWz7zyo6HuU9QnZ2Xy_zsVghP0D47XJqu5hxK3wLyPHGlonseuS7ksG6E4MysTpdIuRVTDHqX_UhncbJeL4wmFQ4LjUCHrAJyOuQDaHUWRNFSg5yd9fGeDnFFw/s1600/IMG_5795.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjWA74n5DyPVOE3tzdyknHWz7zyo6HuU9QnZ2Xy_zsVghP0D47XJqu5hxK3wLyPHGlonseuS7ksG6E4MysTpdIuRVTDHqX_UhncbJeL4wmFQ4LjUCHrAJyOuQDaHUWRNFSg5yd9fGeDnFFw/s320/IMG_5795.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgwjFDetf2cLrTllHNbTjLE_gz45rRXPBptBBD873d6WZccATmAbgkaakD7P_fu7XMrkN4UeWyPhkpyANoq09ITt6Q99gJiDs2NlRjs5VhJC1AgcHmRy7yxMYE1jQ9Y1UG5B-JxC2uCLqHK/s1600/IMG_5789.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="266" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgwjFDetf2cLrTllHNbTjLE_gz45rRXPBptBBD873d6WZccATmAbgkaakD7P_fu7XMrkN4UeWyPhkpyANoq09ITt6Q99gJiDs2NlRjs5VhJC1AgcHmRy7yxMYE1jQ9Y1UG5B-JxC2uCLqHK/s400/IMG_5789.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEinVTp3FYvPx8rzmrQEHBPISExmkv5qmh2aZHTg9jhVT6uK7WhWK29d0XwRYhyphenhyphenSA4Zfh1jHJQLTn7YfsSMyVNAtkCtiE9hfwk9H-DjWzGWnmg_nJstKX29kZ5FlHT5IE4fhUtixj2u8T4de/s1600/IMG_5800.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEinVTp3FYvPx8rzmrQEHBPISExmkv5qmh2aZHTg9jhVT6uK7WhWK29d0XwRYhyphenhyphenSA4Zfh1jHJQLTn7YfsSMyVNAtkCtiE9hfwk9H-DjWzGWnmg_nJstKX29kZ5FlHT5IE4fhUtixj2u8T4de/s320/IMG_5800.jpg" width="213" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjlOV9snBQ91MG7KzQnqAmKz6dU-mdhmvQjfitLKEPuBc9TTrp6Lur5caLgcevXXJR0e1aG5tDsPYjeC_Ay4mxsIKEYFGKAAFii50KqrcjXfKcha-H0bttiUFiF3xEyYv01ZrFJo29bzlC1/s1600/IMG_5814.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjlOV9snBQ91MG7KzQnqAmKz6dU-mdhmvQjfitLKEPuBc9TTrp6Lur5caLgcevXXJR0e1aG5tDsPYjeC_Ay4mxsIKEYFGKAAFii50KqrcjXfKcha-H0bttiUFiF3xEyYv01ZrFJo29bzlC1/s320/IMG_5814.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj_qdNF7LIHayIDykTO0NWOlxSPOLS_P_VNXw5zC7mA6T12Vrzn6R7PiCSDJeBk_6uHzINLU7WAh2z0YtVlyuhhVel7KRJ0XjYub-gXS6kUgWpVIRW_wnza-f8BVvYn9kLUTeuXgbb11QCX/s1600/IMG_5821.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj_qdNF7LIHayIDykTO0NWOlxSPOLS_P_VNXw5zC7mA6T12Vrzn6R7PiCSDJeBk_6uHzINLU7WAh2z0YtVlyuhhVel7KRJ0XjYub-gXS6kUgWpVIRW_wnza-f8BVvYn9kLUTeuXgbb11QCX/s320/IMG_5821.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhe6gJZD6w6xOMykMsC1Ryng0BFN2f2QxOXiPVYJVEANRo_MqcrFjqysWYWq3uWJDB3B2YY_hvnxgLi4rob5ybkjFWbze1kxP5ohNnyB-MOWZCpMKFWnk_CXH5pIIZuoxYw4aOU777lkJTs/s1600/IMG_5829.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhe6gJZD6w6xOMykMsC1Ryng0BFN2f2QxOXiPVYJVEANRo_MqcrFjqysWYWq3uWJDB3B2YY_hvnxgLi4rob5ybkjFWbze1kxP5ohNnyB-MOWZCpMKFWnk_CXH5pIIZuoxYw4aOU777lkJTs/s320/IMG_5829.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgI8OT_am6PA1zB9DqciKosxCwir2K16v9GIXNg2ANHdDzQNvTYrwOzQ69N5X8X5463mRJb-36Moww1TQlQtOlYnNV7OFl9cXYw3chTUfgjKmvKhHjGxTpi3IpHt5FFEBaRugKfXKojnyt3/s1600/IMG_5842.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgI8OT_am6PA1zB9DqciKosxCwir2K16v9GIXNg2ANHdDzQNvTYrwOzQ69N5X8X5463mRJb-36Moww1TQlQtOlYnNV7OFl9cXYw3chTUfgjKmvKhHjGxTpi3IpHt5FFEBaRugKfXKojnyt3/s320/IMG_5842.jpg" width="213" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgrC1xyMMGXyEMCufEHe2eyWRwKGoK_hsmtGBPFTLjquuxXm3xp0G8Nkb55OgjeaGwPhao-XR-cFgXwANejGnoAFZBpwe5Q2Jxy3Q1BTPKdtuK6WvSsKmRB7LHQFw8vkHS-QeGqokdb9887/s1600/IMG_5846.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgrC1xyMMGXyEMCufEHe2eyWRwKGoK_hsmtGBPFTLjquuxXm3xp0G8Nkb55OgjeaGwPhao-XR-cFgXwANejGnoAFZBpwe5Q2Jxy3Q1BTPKdtuK6WvSsKmRB7LHQFw8vkHS-QeGqokdb9887/s320/IMG_5846.jpg" width="213" /></a></div>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #1d2129; font-family: "raleway" , sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 22.5px; text-align: justify;"><span id="goog_1541222795"></span><span id="goog_1541222796"></span></span><br />
<br />Janahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17681902597194726962noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1165576307254676741.post-30534641969524572512016-09-04T12:30:00.001-04:002016-09-04T12:30:57.713-04:00Evolve<div class="weebly-area wsite-not-footer" id="secondlist" style="background-color: white; color: #8e8e8e; font-family: Raleway, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px;">
<ul class="weebly-content-area" style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; position: relative !important; width: 912px;"><table class="editing" data-blog-id="135547690616080329" data-post-id="274485723664330364" id="blogTable" style="border: 0px; position: relative; table-layout: fixed; width: 912px;"><tbody>
<tr><td valign="top"><div class="blog-body " style="float: left; width: 628px;">
<div class="blog-post" id="blog-post-274485723664330364" style="position: relative; zoom: 1;">
<div class="blog-header" style="border: none !important; line-height: 1.5 !important; margin: 2px 0px 0px; overflow: hidden; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 628px;">
<h2 class="blog-title" style="border: 1px dashed rgb(187, 187, 187) !important; color: #484848; font-family: Lora, sans-serif; font-size: 1.7em; font-weight: normal; line-height: 1.5 !important; margin: 0px 0px 8px !important; padding: 0px !important;">
<a class="no-title" data-placeholder="Post Title..." href="https://32113711-919993281549582241.preview.editmysite.com/editor/main.php#" id="blog-post-title" style="color: #5199a8; display: block; outline: 0px !important; text-decoration: none; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published">Evolve</a></h2>
<div class="blog-date" style="float: left; font-size: 13px; line-height: 1; padding: 0px !important;">
<span class="date-text" style="cursor: pointer; float: left; margin: 0px 8px 0px 0px; padding: 0px 0px 4px;">9/4/2016</span></div>
<div class="blog-comments" style="float: right; font-size: 13px; line-height: 1; padding: 0px;">
<a class="blog-link" href="https://32113711-919993281549582241.preview.editmysite.com/editor/main.php#comments" style="color: #5199a8; text-decoration: none; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published">0 Comments</a></div>
</div>
<div class="blog-separator" style="border-bottom: 1px solid rgb(221, 221, 221); clear: both; font-size: 2px; height: 2px; margin-bottom: 5px; margin-top: 0px; padding-top: 2px;">
</div>
<div class="blog-content" style="clear: both; margin-bottom: 20px; text-align: justify;">
<div class="column-blog" id="274485723664330364-blog" style="float: right; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; width: 628px;">
<ul class="weebly-area-active" id="secondlist-blog" style="height: auto !important; margin: 0px; min-height: 400px; padding: 0px; position: relative; width: 628px;">
<li class="inside wsite-text" id="inside_199392136229404784" style="background: transparent !important; list-style: none; margin: 0px 0px 10px; padding: 0px; position: relative; transition: padding 0.5s, transform 0.5s;"><div class="w-element-controls" style="-webkit-user-select: none; left: 0px; opacity: 0; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: visibility 0s ease 0.2s, opacity 0.2s ease; visibility: hidden; z-index: 11;">
<div class="w-move-outer" style="left: -13px; padding: 5px 10px 10px 5px; position: absolute; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-move" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/icons-s16342f837d.png"); background-position: 0px 0px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(136, 206, 255); cursor: pointer; height: 18px; transition: background-color 0.1s ease-in, border-color 0.1s ease-in; width: 18px;">
</div>
</div>
<div class="w-handle-outer" style="left: 314px; margin-left: -48px; padding: 5px 20px 0px; position: absolute; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-handle ui-draggable-handle" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/grips-sde380c0a0d.png"); background-position: 50% -15px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(149, 211, 255); cursor: move; height: 15px; transition: background-color 0.05s ease-in, border-color 0.05s ease-in; width: 55px;">
</div>
</div>
<div class="w-delete-outer" style="padding: 5px 5px 10px 10px; position: absolute; right: -13px; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-delete" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/icons-s16342f837d.png"); background-position: 0px -90px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(136, 206, 255); cursor: pointer; height: 18px; transition: background-color 0.1s ease-in, border-color 0.1s ease-in; width: 18px;" title="Delete">
</div>
</div>
</div>
<div class="element-box" style="border-radius: 4px; box-shadow: transparent 0px 0px 0px 1px; transition: box-shadow 0.2s ease;">
<div class="element-box-contents" style="transition: padding 0.5s;">
<div class="element paragraph editable-text" id="561724105107936308" style="line-height: 1.5; margin: 0px auto 1em; outline: none; padding: 0px;">
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<span style="color: #1d2129;">I try and shoot creatively for me a couple times a month.<br /><br />When I envision a session in my head...it is usually a story line of some sorts.<br />It usually has to do with something that has affected me or something that I have gone thru.<br />Alot of times its not boudoir. Its more of an artistic, fine art session.<br />Less sultry...more story.<br /><br />This session was inspired by changes that we all go thru in life.<br />It is inspired by the fact that in life...we evolve.<br /><br />If we are really living and really paying attention...we will change.<br />We will transform from one thing to another...<br />Sometimes it is a quick painless change...<br />Other times-<br />mucky<br />dirty<br />uncomfortable<br />messy<br />and hard<br /><br />We have to crumble to build.....<br />That is the beauty of life.<br /><br />In those moments...<br />we have choices.<br /><br />We can choose to stay there and sink in it...<br />OR<br />We rise and come clean.<br /><br />We have to choose to shed and change...<br />We have to choose to see the light inside of ourselves.<br />We have to relish in the mud and growth.<br /><br />Because-<br /><br />Without the pain...there is no pleasure.<br />Without the hurt..there is no healing.<br />Without the mess...there is no truth.<br />Without the old..there is no new.<br /><br />Make a choice.<br />Rise.<br /><br /><br /><br /> </span><br />
<br />
<br />
<br /></div>
</div>
</div>
</li>
<li class="inside wsite-image wsite-image-move" id="inside_371033800712370629" style="background: transparent !important; list-style: none; margin: 0px 0px 10px; padding: 0px; position: relative; transition: padding 0.5s, transform 0.5s;"><div class="w-element-controls" style="-webkit-user-select: none; left: 0px; opacity: 0; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: visibility 0s ease 0.2s, opacity 0.2s ease; visibility: hidden; z-index: 11;">
<div class="w-move-outer" style="left: -13px; padding: 5px 10px 10px 5px; position: absolute; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-move" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/icons-s16342f837d.png"); background-position: 0px 0px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(136, 206, 255); cursor: pointer; height: 18px; transition: background-color 0.1s ease-in, border-color 0.1s ease-in; width: 18px;">
</div>
</div>
<div class="w-handle-outer" style="left: 314px; margin-left: -48px; padding: 5px 20px 0px; position: absolute; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-handle ui-draggable-handle" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/grips-sde380c0a0d.png"); background-position: 50% -15px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(149, 211, 255); cursor: move; height: 15px; transition: background-color 0.05s ease-in, border-color 0.05s ease-in; width: 55px;">
</div>
</div>
<div class="w-delete-outer" style="padding: 5px 5px 10px 10px; position: absolute; right: -13px; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-delete" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/icons-s16342f837d.png"); background-position: 0px -90px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(136, 206, 255); cursor: pointer; height: 18px; transition: background-color 0.1s ease-in, border-color 0.1s ease-in; width: 18px;" title="Delete">
</div>
</div>
</div>
<div class="element-box" style="border-radius: 4px; box-shadow: transparent 0px 0px 0px 1px; transition: box-shadow 0.2s ease;">
<div class="element-box-contents" style="transition: padding 0.5s;">
<div class="element" id="459338840288032784">
<div class="wsite-image wsite-image-border-medium " style="margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 10px; padding-bottom: 10px; padding-left: 4px !important; padding-right: 4px !important; padding-top: 5px; position: relative; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published"></a><br />
<div class="ui-wrapper" style="display: inline-block; height: 808px; left: 0px; margin: 0px -4px; overflow: visible; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: middle; width: 541px;">
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published"><img alt="Picture" class="ui-draggable-handle ui-resizable" src="https://32113711-919993281549582241.preview.editmysite.com/uploads/3/2/1/1/32113711/img-5626_orig.jpg" style="border: 1px solid rgb(208, 208, 208); display: block; height: 800px; margin: 0px !important; max-width: 100%; padding: 3px !important; position: static; resize: none; vertical-align: middle; width: 533px; zoom: 1;" /></a></div>
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published">
</a><br />
<div style="font-size: 13.5px;">
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</li>
<li class="inside wsite-image wsite-image-move" id="inside_306038683940726717" style="background: transparent !important; list-style: none; margin: 0px 0px 10px; padding: 0px; position: relative; transition: padding 0.5s, transform 0.5s;"><div class="w-element-controls" style="-webkit-user-select: none; left: 0px; opacity: 0; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: visibility 0s ease 0.2s, opacity 0.2s ease; visibility: hidden; z-index: 11;">
<div class="w-move-outer" style="left: -13px; padding: 5px 10px 10px 5px; position: absolute; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-move" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/icons-s16342f837d.png"); background-position: 0px 0px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(136, 206, 255); cursor: pointer; height: 18px; transition: background-color 0.1s ease-in, border-color 0.1s ease-in; width: 18px;">
</div>
</div>
<div class="w-handle-outer" style="left: 314px; margin-left: -48px; padding: 5px 20px 0px; position: absolute; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-handle ui-draggable-handle" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/grips-sde380c0a0d.png"); background-position: 50% -15px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(149, 211, 255); cursor: move; height: 15px; transition: background-color 0.05s ease-in, border-color 0.05s ease-in; width: 55px;">
</div>
</div>
<div class="w-delete-outer" style="padding: 5px 5px 10px 10px; position: absolute; right: -13px; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-delete" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/icons-s16342f837d.png"); background-position: 0px -90px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(136, 206, 255); cursor: pointer; height: 18px; transition: background-color 0.1s ease-in, border-color 0.1s ease-in; width: 18px;" title="Delete">
</div>
</div>
</div>
<div class="element-box" style="border-radius: 4px; box-shadow: transparent 0px 0px 0px 1px; transition: box-shadow 0.2s ease;">
<div class="element-box-contents" style="transition: padding 0.5s;">
<div class="element" id="280438782685148125">
<div class="wsite-image wsite-image-border-none " style="margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 10px; padding-top: 10px; position: relative; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published"></a><br />
<div class="ui-wrapper" style="display: inline-block; height: 800px; left: 0px; margin: 0px; overflow: visible; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: middle; width: 533px;">
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published"><img alt="Picture" class="ui-draggable-handle ui-resizable" src="https://32113711-919993281549582241.preview.editmysite.com/uploads/3/2/1/1/32113711/img-5622_orig.jpg" style="border: 0px; display: block; height: 800px; margin: 0px !important; max-width: 100%; position: static; resize: none; vertical-align: middle; width: 533px; zoom: 1;" /></a></div>
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published">
</a><br />
<div style="font-size: 13.5px;">
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</li>
<li class="inside wsite-image wsite-image-move" id="inside_424479152942414127" style="background: transparent !important; list-style: none; margin: 0px 0px 10px; padding: 0px; position: relative; transition: padding 0.5s, transform 0.5s;"><div class="w-element-controls" style="-webkit-user-select: none; left: 0px; opacity: 0; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: visibility 0s ease 0.2s, opacity 0.2s ease; visibility: hidden; z-index: 11;">
<div class="w-move-outer" style="left: -13px; padding: 5px 10px 10px 5px; position: absolute; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-move" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/icons-s16342f837d.png"); background-position: 0px 0px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(136, 206, 255); cursor: pointer; height: 18px; transition: background-color 0.1s ease-in, border-color 0.1s ease-in; width: 18px;">
</div>
</div>
<div class="w-handle-outer" style="left: 314px; margin-left: -48px; padding: 5px 20px 0px; position: absolute; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-handle ui-draggable-handle" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/grips-sde380c0a0d.png"); background-position: 50% -15px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(149, 211, 255); cursor: move; height: 15px; transition: background-color 0.05s ease-in, border-color 0.05s ease-in; width: 55px;">
</div>
</div>
<div class="w-delete-outer" style="padding: 5px 5px 10px 10px; position: absolute; right: -13px; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-delete" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/icons-s16342f837d.png"); background-position: 0px -90px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(136, 206, 255); cursor: pointer; height: 18px; transition: background-color 0.1s ease-in, border-color 0.1s ease-in; width: 18px;" title="Delete">
</div>
</div>
</div>
<div class="element-box" style="border-radius: 4px; box-shadow: transparent 0px 0px 0px 1px; transition: box-shadow 0.2s ease;">
<div class="element-box-contents" style="transition: padding 0.5s;">
<div class="element" id="486029020957685113">
<div class="wsite-image wsite-image-border-none " style="margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 10px; padding-top: 10px; position: relative; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published"></a><br />
<div class="ui-wrapper" style="display: inline-block; height: 800px; left: 0px; margin: 0px; overflow: visible; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: middle; width: 533px;">
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published"><img alt="Picture" class="ui-draggable-handle ui-resizable" src="https://32113711-919993281549582241.preview.editmysite.com/uploads/3/2/1/1/32113711/img-5641_orig.jpg" style="border: 0px; display: block; height: 800px; margin: 0px !important; max-width: 100%; position: static; resize: none; vertical-align: middle; width: 533px; zoom: 1;" /></a></div>
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published">
</a><br />
<div style="font-size: 13.5px;">
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</li>
<li class="inside wsite-image wsite-image-move" id="inside_456299219721871980" style="background: transparent !important; list-style: none; margin: 0px 0px 10px; padding: 0px; position: relative; transition: padding 0.5s, transform 0.5s;"><div class="w-element-controls" style="-webkit-user-select: none; left: 0px; opacity: 0; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: visibility 0s ease 0.2s, opacity 0.2s ease; visibility: hidden; z-index: 11;">
<div class="w-move-outer" style="left: -13px; padding: 5px 10px 10px 5px; position: absolute; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-move" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/icons-s16342f837d.png"); background-position: 0px 0px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(136, 206, 255); cursor: pointer; height: 18px; transition: background-color 0.1s ease-in, border-color 0.1s ease-in; width: 18px;">
</div>
</div>
<div class="w-handle-outer" style="left: 314px; margin-left: -48px; padding: 5px 20px 0px; position: absolute; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-handle ui-draggable-handle" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/grips-sde380c0a0d.png"); background-position: 50% -15px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(149, 211, 255); cursor: move; height: 15px; transition: background-color 0.05s ease-in, border-color 0.05s ease-in; width: 55px;">
</div>
</div>
<div class="w-delete-outer" style="padding: 5px 5px 10px 10px; position: absolute; right: -13px; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-delete" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/icons-s16342f837d.png"); background-position: 0px -90px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(136, 206, 255); cursor: pointer; height: 18px; transition: background-color 0.1s ease-in, border-color 0.1s ease-in; width: 18px;" title="Delete">
</div>
</div>
</div>
<div class="element-box" style="border-radius: 4px; box-shadow: transparent 0px 0px 0px 1px; transition: box-shadow 0.2s ease;">
<div class="element-box-contents" style="transition: padding 0.5s;">
<div class="element" id="115469702381224099">
<div class="wsite-image wsite-image-border-none " style="margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 10px; padding-top: 10px; position: relative; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published"></a><br />
<div class="ui-wrapper" style="display: inline-block; height: 418px; left: 0px; margin: 0px; overflow: visible; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: middle; width: 628px;">
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published"><img alt="Picture" class="ui-draggable-handle ui-resizable" src="https://32113711-919993281549582241.preview.editmysite.com/uploads/3/2/1/1/32113711/img-5654_orig.jpg" style="border: 0px; display: block; height: 418px; margin: 0px !important; max-width: 100%; position: static; resize: none; vertical-align: middle; width: 628px; zoom: 1;" /></a></div>
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published">
</a><br />
<div style="font-size: 13.5px;">
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</li>
<li class="inside wsite-image wsite-image-move" id="inside_464101021561036035" style="background: transparent !important; list-style: none; margin: 0px 0px 10px; padding: 0px; position: relative; transition: padding 0.5s, transform 0.5s;"><div class="w-element-controls" style="-webkit-user-select: none; left: 0px; opacity: 0; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: visibility 0s ease 0.2s, opacity 0.2s ease; visibility: hidden; z-index: 11;">
<div class="w-move-outer" style="left: -13px; padding: 5px 10px 10px 5px; position: absolute; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-move" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/icons-s16342f837d.png"); background-position: 0px 0px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(136, 206, 255); cursor: pointer; height: 18px; transition: background-color 0.1s ease-in, border-color 0.1s ease-in; width: 18px;">
</div>
</div>
<div class="w-handle-outer" style="left: 314px; margin-left: -48px; padding: 5px 20px 0px; position: absolute; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-handle ui-draggable-handle" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/grips-sde380c0a0d.png"); background-position: 50% -15px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(149, 211, 255); cursor: move; height: 15px; transition: background-color 0.05s ease-in, border-color 0.05s ease-in; width: 55px;">
</div>
</div>
<div class="w-delete-outer" style="padding: 5px 5px 10px 10px; position: absolute; right: -13px; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-delete" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/icons-s16342f837d.png"); background-position: 0px -90px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(136, 206, 255); cursor: pointer; height: 18px; transition: background-color 0.1s ease-in, border-color 0.1s ease-in; width: 18px;" title="Delete">
</div>
</div>
</div>
<div class="element-box" style="border-radius: 4px; box-shadow: transparent 0px 0px 0px 1px; transition: box-shadow 0.2s ease;">
<div class="element-box-contents" style="transition: padding 0.5s;">
<div class="element" id="498027556978246286">
<div class="wsite-image wsite-image-border-none " style="margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 10px; padding-top: 10px; position: relative; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published"></a><br />
<div class="ui-wrapper" style="display: inline-block; height: 800px; left: 0px; margin: 0px; overflow: visible; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: middle; width: 533px;">
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published"><img alt="Picture" class="ui-draggable-handle ui-resizable" src="https://32113711-919993281549582241.preview.editmysite.com/uploads/3/2/1/1/32113711/img-5669_orig.jpg" style="border: 0px; display: block; height: 800px; margin: 0px !important; max-width: 100%; position: static; resize: none; vertical-align: middle; width: 533px; zoom: 1;" /></a></div>
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published">
</a><br />
<div style="font-size: 13.5px;">
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</li>
<li class="inside wsite-image wsite-image-move" id="inside_203225084299011197" style="background: transparent !important; list-style: none; margin: 0px 0px 10px; padding: 0px; position: relative; transition: padding 0.5s, transform 0.5s;"><div class="w-element-controls" style="-webkit-user-select: none; left: 0px; opacity: 0; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: visibility 0s ease 0.2s, opacity 0.2s ease; visibility: hidden; z-index: 11;">
<div class="w-move-outer" style="left: -13px; padding: 5px 10px 10px 5px; position: absolute; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-move" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/icons-s16342f837d.png"); background-position: 0px 0px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(136, 206, 255); cursor: pointer; height: 18px; transition: background-color 0.1s ease-in, border-color 0.1s ease-in; width: 18px;">
</div>
</div>
<div class="w-handle-outer" style="left: 314px; margin-left: -48px; padding: 5px 20px 0px; position: absolute; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-handle ui-draggable-handle" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/grips-sde380c0a0d.png"); background-position: 50% -15px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(149, 211, 255); cursor: move; height: 15px; transition: background-color 0.05s ease-in, border-color 0.05s ease-in; width: 55px;">
</div>
</div>
<div class="w-delete-outer" style="padding: 5px 5px 10px 10px; position: absolute; right: -13px; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-delete" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/icons-s16342f837d.png"); background-position: 0px -90px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(136, 206, 255); cursor: pointer; height: 18px; transition: background-color 0.1s ease-in, border-color 0.1s ease-in; width: 18px;" title="Delete">
</div>
</div>
</div>
<div class="element-box" style="border-radius: 4px; box-shadow: transparent 0px 0px 0px 1px; transition: box-shadow 0.2s ease;">
<div class="element-box-contents" style="transition: padding 0.5s;">
<div class="element" id="283229632431322925">
<div class="wsite-image wsite-image-border-none " style="margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 10px; padding-top: 10px; position: relative; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published"></a><br />
<div class="ui-wrapper" style="display: inline-block; height: 800px; left: 0px; margin: 0px; overflow: visible; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: middle; width: 533px;">
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published"><img alt="Picture" class="ui-draggable-handle ui-resizable" src="https://32113711-919993281549582241.preview.editmysite.com/uploads/3/2/1/1/32113711/img-5731_orig.jpg" style="border: 0px; display: block; height: 800px; margin: 0px !important; max-width: 100%; position: static; resize: none; vertical-align: middle; width: 533px; zoom: 1;" /></a></div>
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published">
</a><br />
<div style="font-size: 13.5px;">
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</li>
<li class="inside wsite-image wsite-image-move" id="inside_652001391854630605" style="background: transparent !important; list-style: none; margin: 0px 0px 10px; padding: 0px; position: relative; transition: padding 0.5s, transform 0.5s;"><div class="w-element-controls" style="-webkit-user-select: none; left: 0px; opacity: 0; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: visibility 0s ease 0.2s, opacity 0.2s ease; visibility: hidden; z-index: 11;">
<div class="w-move-outer" style="left: -13px; padding: 5px 10px 10px 5px; position: absolute; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-move" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/icons-s16342f837d.png"); background-position: 0px 0px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(136, 206, 255); cursor: pointer; height: 18px; transition: background-color 0.1s ease-in, border-color 0.1s ease-in; width: 18px;">
</div>
</div>
<div class="w-handle-outer" style="left: 314px; margin-left: -48px; padding: 5px 20px 0px; position: absolute; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-handle ui-draggable-handle" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/grips-sde380c0a0d.png"); background-position: 50% -15px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(149, 211, 255); cursor: move; height: 15px; transition: background-color 0.05s ease-in, border-color 0.05s ease-in; width: 55px;">
</div>
</div>
<div class="w-delete-outer" style="padding: 5px 5px 10px 10px; position: absolute; right: -13px; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-delete" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/icons-s16342f837d.png"); background-position: 0px -90px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(136, 206, 255); cursor: pointer; height: 18px; transition: background-color 0.1s ease-in, border-color 0.1s ease-in; width: 18px;" title="Delete">
</div>
</div>
</div>
<div class="element-box" style="border-radius: 4px; box-shadow: transparent 0px 0px 0px 1px; transition: box-shadow 0.2s ease;">
<div class="element-box-contents" style="transition: padding 0.5s;">
<div class="element" id="224383863686900948">
<div class="wsite-image wsite-image-border-none " style="margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 10px; padding-top: 10px; position: relative; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published"></a><br />
<div class="ui-wrapper" style="display: inline-block; height: 418px; left: 0px; margin: 0px; overflow: visible; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: middle; width: 628px;">
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published"><img alt="Picture" class="ui-draggable-handle ui-resizable" src="https://32113711-919993281549582241.preview.editmysite.com/uploads/3/2/1/1/32113711/img-5689_orig.jpg" style="border: 0px; display: block; height: 418px; margin: 0px !important; max-width: 100%; position: static; resize: none; vertical-align: middle; width: 628px; zoom: 1;" /></a></div>
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published">
</a><br />
<div style="font-size: 13.5px;">
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</li>
<li class="inside wsite-image wsite-image-move" id="inside_942182202492035118" style="background: transparent !important; list-style: none; margin: 0px 0px 10px; padding: 0px; position: relative; transition: padding 0.5s, transform 0.5s;"><div class="w-element-controls" style="-webkit-user-select: none; left: 0px; opacity: 0; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: visibility 0s ease 0.2s, opacity 0.2s ease; visibility: hidden; z-index: 11;">
<div class="w-move-outer" style="left: -13px; padding: 5px 10px 10px 5px; position: absolute; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-move" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/icons-s16342f837d.png"); background-position: 0px 0px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(136, 206, 255); cursor: pointer; height: 18px; transition: background-color 0.1s ease-in, border-color 0.1s ease-in; width: 18px;">
</div>
</div>
<div class="w-handle-outer" style="left: 314px; margin-left: -48px; padding: 5px 20px 0px; position: absolute; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-handle ui-draggable-handle" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/grips-sde380c0a0d.png"); background-position: 50% -15px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(149, 211, 255); cursor: move; height: 15px; transition: background-color 0.05s ease-in, border-color 0.05s ease-in; width: 55px;">
</div>
</div>
<div class="w-delete-outer" style="padding: 5px 5px 10px 10px; position: absolute; right: -13px; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-delete" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/icons-s16342f837d.png"); background-position: 0px -90px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(136, 206, 255); cursor: pointer; height: 18px; transition: background-color 0.1s ease-in, border-color 0.1s ease-in; width: 18px;" title="Delete">
</div>
</div>
</div>
<div class="element-box" style="border-radius: 4px; box-shadow: transparent 0px 0px 0px 1px; transition: box-shadow 0.2s ease;">
<div class="element-box-contents" style="transition: padding 0.5s;">
<div class="element" id="153690805117234691">
<div class="wsite-image wsite-image-border-none " style="margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 10px; padding-top: 10px; position: relative; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published"></a><br />
<div class="ui-wrapper" style="display: inline-block; height: 418px; left: 0px; margin: 0px; overflow: visible; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: middle; width: 628px;">
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published"><img alt="Picture" class="ui-draggable-handle ui-resizable" src="https://32113711-919993281549582241.preview.editmysite.com/uploads/3/2/1/1/32113711/img-5697_orig.jpg" style="border: 0px; display: block; height: 418px; margin: 0px !important; max-width: 100%; position: static; resize: none; vertical-align: middle; width: 628px; zoom: 1;" /></a></div>
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published">
</a><br />
<div style="font-size: 13.5px;">
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</li>
<li class="inside wsite-image wsite-image-move" id="inside_669329882831045080" style="background: transparent !important; list-style: none; margin: 0px 0px 10px; padding: 0px; position: relative; transition: padding 0.5s, transform 0.5s;"><div class="w-element-controls" style="-webkit-user-select: none; left: 0px; opacity: 0; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: visibility 0s ease 0.2s, opacity 0.2s ease; visibility: hidden; z-index: 11;">
<div class="w-move-outer" style="left: -13px; padding: 5px 10px 10px 5px; position: absolute; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-move" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/icons-s16342f837d.png"); background-position: 0px 0px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(136, 206, 255); cursor: pointer; height: 18px; transition: background-color 0.1s ease-in, border-color 0.1s ease-in; width: 18px;">
</div>
</div>
<div class="w-handle-outer" style="left: 314px; margin-left: -48px; padding: 5px 20px 0px; position: absolute; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-handle ui-draggable-handle" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/grips-sde380c0a0d.png"); background-position: 50% -15px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(149, 211, 255); cursor: move; height: 15px; transition: background-color 0.05s ease-in, border-color 0.05s ease-in; width: 55px;">
</div>
</div>
<div class="w-delete-outer" style="padding: 5px 5px 10px 10px; position: absolute; right: -13px; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-delete" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/icons-s16342f837d.png"); background-position: 0px -90px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(136, 206, 255); cursor: pointer; height: 18px; transition: background-color 0.1s ease-in, border-color 0.1s ease-in; width: 18px;" title="Delete">
</div>
</div>
</div>
<div class="element-box" style="border-radius: 4px; box-shadow: transparent 0px 0px 0px 1px; transition: box-shadow 0.2s ease;">
<div class="element-box-contents" style="transition: padding 0.5s;">
<div class="element" id="996892846299651778">
<div class="wsite-image wsite-image-border-none " style="margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 10px; padding-top: 10px; position: relative; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published"></a><br />
<div class="ui-wrapper" style="display: inline-block; height: 418px; left: 0px; margin: 0px; overflow: visible; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: middle; width: 628px;">
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published"><img alt="Picture" class="ui-draggable-handle ui-resizable" src="https://32113711-919993281549582241.preview.editmysite.com/uploads/3/2/1/1/32113711/img-5722_orig.jpg" style="border: 0px; display: block; height: 418px; margin: 0px !important; max-width: 100%; position: static; resize: none; vertical-align: middle; width: 628px; zoom: 1;" /></a></div>
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published">
</a><br />
<div style="font-size: 13.5px;">
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</li>
<li class="inside wsite-image wsite-image-move" id="inside_687087431445929184" style="background: transparent !important; list-style: none; margin: 0px 0px 10px; padding: 0px; position: relative; transition: padding 0.5s, transform 0.5s;"><div class="w-element-controls" style="-webkit-user-select: none; left: 0px; opacity: 0; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: visibility 0s ease 0.2s, opacity 0.2s ease; visibility: hidden; z-index: 11;">
<div class="w-move-outer" style="left: -13px; padding: 5px 10px 10px 5px; position: absolute; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-move" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/icons-s16342f837d.png"); background-position: 0px 0px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(136, 206, 255); cursor: pointer; height: 18px; transition: background-color 0.1s ease-in, border-color 0.1s ease-in; width: 18px;">
</div>
</div>
<div class="w-handle-outer" style="left: 314px; margin-left: -48px; padding: 5px 20px 0px; position: absolute; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-handle ui-draggable-handle" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/grips-sde380c0a0d.png"); background-position: 50% -15px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(149, 211, 255); cursor: move; height: 15px; transition: background-color 0.05s ease-in, border-color 0.05s ease-in; width: 55px;">
</div>
</div>
<div class="w-delete-outer" style="padding: 5px 5px 10px 10px; position: absolute; right: -13px; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-delete" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/icons-s16342f837d.png"); background-position: 0px -90px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(136, 206, 255); cursor: pointer; height: 18px; transition: background-color 0.1s ease-in, border-color 0.1s ease-in; width: 18px;" title="Delete">
</div>
</div>
</div>
<div class="element-box" style="border-radius: 4px; box-shadow: transparent 0px 0px 0px 1px; transition: box-shadow 0.2s ease;">
<div class="element-box-contents" style="transition: padding 0.5s;">
<div class="element" id="312016718708547036">
<div class="wsite-image wsite-image-border-none " style="margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 10px; padding-top: 10px; position: relative; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published"></a><br />
<div class="ui-wrapper" style="display: inline-block; height: 800px; left: 0px; margin: 0px; overflow: visible; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: middle; width: 533px;">
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published"><img alt="Picture" class="ui-draggable-handle ui-resizable" src="https://32113711-919993281549582241.preview.editmysite.com/uploads/3/2/1/1/32113711/img-5749_1_orig.jpg" style="border: 0px; display: block; height: 800px; margin: 0px !important; max-width: 100%; position: static; resize: none; vertical-align: middle; width: 533px; zoom: 1;" /></a></div>
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published">
</a><br />
<div style="font-size: 13.5px;">
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</li>
<li class="inside wsite-image wsite-image-move" id="inside_114489569470699179" style="background: transparent !important; list-style: none; margin: 0px 0px 10px; padding: 0px; position: relative; transition: padding 0.5s, transform 0.5s;"><div class="w-element-controls" style="-webkit-user-select: none; left: 0px; opacity: 0; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: visibility 0s ease 0.2s, opacity 0.2s ease; visibility: hidden; z-index: 11;">
<div class="w-move-outer" style="left: -13px; padding: 5px 10px 10px 5px; position: absolute; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-move" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/icons-s16342f837d.png"); background-position: 0px 0px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(136, 206, 255); cursor: pointer; height: 18px; transition: background-color 0.1s ease-in, border-color 0.1s ease-in; width: 18px;">
</div>
</div>
<div class="w-handle-outer" style="left: 314px; margin-left: -48px; padding: 5px 20px 0px; position: absolute; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-handle ui-draggable-handle" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/grips-sde380c0a0d.png"); background-position: 50% -15px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(149, 211, 255); cursor: move; height: 15px; transition: background-color 0.05s ease-in, border-color 0.05s ease-in; width: 55px;">
</div>
</div>
<div class="w-delete-outer" style="padding: 5px 5px 10px 10px; position: absolute; right: -13px; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-delete" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/icons-s16342f837d.png"); background-position: 0px -90px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(136, 206, 255); cursor: pointer; height: 18px; transition: background-color 0.1s ease-in, border-color 0.1s ease-in; width: 18px;" title="Delete">
</div>
</div>
</div>
<div class="element-box" style="border-radius: 4px; box-shadow: transparent 0px 0px 0px 1px; transition: box-shadow 0.2s ease;">
<div class="element-box-contents" style="transition: padding 0.5s;">
<div class="element" id="838852508651895893">
<div class="wsite-image wsite-image-border-none " style="margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 10px; padding-top: 10px; position: relative; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published"></a><br />
<div class="ui-wrapper" style="display: inline-block; height: 418px; left: 0px; margin: 0px; overflow: visible; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: middle; width: 628px;">
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published"><img alt="Picture" class="ui-draggable-handle ui-resizable" src="https://32113711-919993281549582241.preview.editmysite.com/uploads/3/2/1/1/32113711/img-5762_orig.jpg" style="border: 0px; display: block; height: 418px; margin: 0px !important; max-width: 100%; position: static; resize: none; vertical-align: middle; width: 628px; zoom: 1;" /></a></div>
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published">
</a><br />
<div style="font-size: 13.5px;">
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</li>
<li class="inside wsite-image wsite-image-move" id="inside_826408167804990002" style="background: transparent !important; list-style: none; margin: 0px 0px 10px; padding: 0px; position: relative; transition: padding 0.5s, transform 0.5s;"><div class="w-element-controls" style="-webkit-user-select: none; left: 0px; opacity: 0; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: visibility 0s ease 0.2s, opacity 0.2s ease; visibility: hidden; z-index: 11;">
<div class="w-move-outer" style="left: -13px; padding: 5px 10px 10px 5px; position: absolute; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-move" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/icons-s16342f837d.png"); background-position: 0px 0px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(136, 206, 255); cursor: pointer; height: 18px; transition: background-color 0.1s ease-in, border-color 0.1s ease-in; width: 18px;">
</div>
</div>
<div class="w-handle-outer" style="left: 314px; margin-left: -48px; padding: 5px 20px 0px; position: absolute; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-handle ui-draggable-handle" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/grips-sde380c0a0d.png"); background-position: 50% -15px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(149, 211, 255); cursor: move; height: 15px; transition: background-color 0.05s ease-in, border-color 0.05s ease-in; width: 55px;">
</div>
</div>
<div class="w-delete-outer" style="padding: 5px 5px 10px 10px; position: absolute; right: -13px; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-delete" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/icons-s16342f837d.png"); background-position: 0px -90px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(136, 206, 255); cursor: pointer; height: 18px; transition: background-color 0.1s ease-in, border-color 0.1s ease-in; width: 18px;" title="Delete">
</div>
</div>
</div>
<div class="element-box" style="border-radius: 4px; box-shadow: transparent 0px 0px 0px 1px; transition: box-shadow 0.2s ease;">
<div class="element-box-contents" style="transition: padding 0.5s;">
<div class="element" id="652823135267187420">
<div class="wsite-image wsite-image-border-none " style="margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 10px; padding-top: 10px; position: relative; text-align: right;">
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published"></a><br />
<div class="ui-wrapper" style="display: inline-block; height: 418px; left: 0px; margin: 0px; overflow: visible; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: middle; width: 628px;">
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published"><img alt="Picture" class="ui-draggable-handle ui-resizable" src="https://32113711-919993281549582241.preview.editmysite.com/uploads/3/2/1/1/32113711/img-5740_1_orig.jpg" style="border: 0px; display: block; height: 418px; margin: 0px !important; max-width: 100%; position: static; resize: none; vertical-align: middle; width: 628px; zoom: 1;" /></a></div>
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published">
</a><br />
<div style="font-size: 13.5px;">
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</li>
<li class="inside wsite-image wsite-image-move" id="inside_501959276961106095" style="background: transparent !important; list-style: none; margin: 0px 0px 10px; padding: 0px; position: relative; transition: padding 0.5s, transform 0.5s;"><div class="w-element-controls" style="-webkit-user-select: none; left: 0px; opacity: 0; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: visibility 0s ease 0.2s, opacity 0.2s ease; visibility: hidden; z-index: 11;">
<div class="w-move-outer" style="left: -13px; padding: 5px 10px 10px 5px; position: absolute; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-move" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/icons-s16342f837d.png"); background-position: 0px 0px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(136, 206, 255); cursor: pointer; height: 18px; transition: background-color 0.1s ease-in, border-color 0.1s ease-in; width: 18px;">
</div>
</div>
<div class="w-handle-outer" style="left: 314px; margin-left: -48px; padding: 5px 20px 0px; position: absolute; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-handle ui-draggable-handle" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/grips-sde380c0a0d.png"); background-position: 50% -15px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(149, 211, 255); cursor: move; height: 15px; transition: background-color 0.05s ease-in, border-color 0.05s ease-in; width: 55px;">
</div>
</div>
<div class="w-delete-outer" style="padding: 5px 5px 10px 10px; position: absolute; right: -13px; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-delete" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/icons-s16342f837d.png"); background-position: 0px -90px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(136, 206, 255); cursor: pointer; height: 18px; transition: background-color 0.1s ease-in, border-color 0.1s ease-in; width: 18px;" title="Delete">
</div>
</div>
</div>
<div class="element-box" style="border-radius: 4px; box-shadow: transparent 0px 0px 0px 1px; transition: box-shadow 0.2s ease;">
<div class="element-box-contents" style="transition: padding 0.5s;">
<div class="element" id="488675097840971186">
<div class="wsite-image wsite-image-border-none " style="margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 10px; padding-top: 10px; position: relative; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published"></a><br />
<div class="ui-wrapper" style="display: inline-block; height: 418px; left: 0px; margin: 0px; overflow: visible; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: middle; width: 628px;">
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published"><img alt="Picture" class="ui-draggable-handle ui-resizable" src="https://32113711-919993281549582241.preview.editmysite.com/uploads/3/2/1/1/32113711/img-5769_orig.jpg" style="border: 0px; display: block; height: 418px; margin: 0px !important; max-width: 100%; position: static; resize: none; vertical-align: middle; width: 628px; zoom: 1;" /></a></div>
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published">
</a><br />
<div style="font-size: 13.5px;">
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</li>
<li class="inside wsite-image wsite-image-move" id="inside_635582175762075207" style="background: transparent !important; list-style: none; margin: 0px 0px 10px; padding: 0px; position: relative; transition: padding 0.5s, transform 0.5s;"><div class="w-element-controls" style="-webkit-user-select: none; left: 0px; opacity: 0; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: visibility 0s ease 0.2s, opacity 0.2s ease; visibility: hidden; z-index: 11;">
<div class="w-move-outer" style="left: -13px; padding: 5px 10px 10px 5px; position: absolute; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-move" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/icons-s16342f837d.png"); background-position: 0px 0px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(136, 206, 255); cursor: pointer; height: 18px; transition: background-color 0.1s ease-in, border-color 0.1s ease-in; width: 18px;">
</div>
</div>
<div class="w-handle-outer" style="left: 314px; margin-left: -48px; padding: 5px 20px 0px; position: absolute; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-handle ui-draggable-handle" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/grips-sde380c0a0d.png"); background-position: 50% -15px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(149, 211, 255); cursor: move; height: 15px; transition: background-color 0.05s ease-in, border-color 0.05s ease-in; width: 55px;">
</div>
</div>
<div class="w-delete-outer" style="padding: 5px 5px 10px 10px; position: absolute; right: -13px; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-delete" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/icons-s16342f837d.png"); background-position: 0px -90px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(136, 206, 255); cursor: pointer; height: 18px; transition: background-color 0.1s ease-in, border-color 0.1s ease-in; width: 18px;" title="Delete">
</div>
</div>
</div>
<div class="element-box" style="border-radius: 4px; box-shadow: transparent 0px 0px 0px 1px; transition: box-shadow 0.2s ease;">
<div class="element-box-contents" style="transition: padding 0.5s;">
<div class="element" id="215361501559971970">
<div class="wsite-image wsite-image-border-none " style="margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 10px; padding-top: 10px; position: relative; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published"></a><br />
<div class="ui-wrapper" style="display: inline-block; height: 418px; left: 0px; margin: 0px; overflow: visible; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: middle; width: 628px;">
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published"><img alt="Picture" class="ui-draggable-handle ui-resizable" src="https://32113711-919993281549582241.preview.editmysite.com/uploads/3/2/1/1/32113711/img-5776-edit_orig.jpg" style="border: 0px; display: block; height: 418px; margin: 0px !important; max-width: 100%; position: static; resize: none; vertical-align: middle; width: 628px; zoom: 1;" /></a></div>
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published">
</a><br />
<div style="font-size: 13.5px;">
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</li>
<li class="inside wsite-image wsite-image-move" id="inside_802010566935432542" style="background: transparent !important; list-style: none; margin: 0px 0px 10px; padding: 0px; position: relative; transition: padding 0.5s, transform 0.5s;"><div class="w-element-controls" style="-webkit-user-select: none; left: 0px; opacity: 0; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: visibility 0s ease 0.2s, opacity 0.2s ease; visibility: hidden; z-index: 11;">
<div class="w-move-outer" style="left: -13px; padding: 5px 10px 10px 5px; position: absolute; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-move" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/icons-s16342f837d.png"); background-position: 0px 0px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(136, 206, 255); cursor: pointer; height: 18px; transition: background-color 0.1s ease-in, border-color 0.1s ease-in; width: 18px;">
</div>
</div>
<div class="w-handle-outer" style="left: 314px; margin-left: -48px; padding: 5px 20px 0px; position: absolute; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-handle ui-draggable-handle" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/grips-sde380c0a0d.png"); background-position: 50% -15px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(149, 211, 255); cursor: move; height: 15px; transition: background-color 0.05s ease-in, border-color 0.05s ease-in; width: 55px;">
</div>
</div>
<div class="w-delete-outer" style="padding: 5px 5px 10px 10px; position: absolute; right: -13px; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-delete" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/icons-s16342f837d.png"); background-position: 0px -90px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(136, 206, 255); cursor: pointer; height: 18px; transition: background-color 0.1s ease-in, border-color 0.1s ease-in; width: 18px;" title="Delete">
</div>
</div>
</div>
<div class="element-box" style="border-radius: 4px; box-shadow: transparent 0px 0px 0px 1px; transition: box-shadow 0.2s ease;">
<div class="element-box-contents" style="transition: padding 0.5s;">
<div class="element" id="220378561637690738">
<div class="wsite-image wsite-image-border-none " style="margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 10px; padding-top: 10px; position: relative; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published"></a><br />
<div class="ui-wrapper" style="display: inline-block; height: 418px; left: 0px; margin: 0px; overflow: visible; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: middle; width: 628px;">
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published"><img alt="Picture" class="ui-draggable-handle ui-resizable" src="https://32113711-919993281549582241.preview.editmysite.com/uploads/3/2/1/1/32113711/img-5779-edit_2_orig.jpg" style="border: 0px; display: block; height: 418px; margin: 0px !important; max-width: 100%; position: static; resize: none; vertical-align: middle; width: 628px; zoom: 1;" /></a></div>
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published">
</a><br />
<div style="font-size: 13.5px;">
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</li>
<li class="inside wsite-image wsite-image-move" id="inside_663575575976167001" style="background: transparent !important; list-style: none; margin: 0px 0px 10px; padding: 0px; position: relative; transition: padding 0.5s, transform 0.5s;"><div class="w-element-controls" style="-webkit-user-select: none; left: 0px; opacity: 0; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: visibility 0s ease 0.2s, opacity 0.2s ease; visibility: hidden; z-index: 11;">
<div class="w-move-outer" style="left: -13px; padding: 5px 10px 10px 5px; position: absolute; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-move" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/icons-s16342f837d.png"); background-position: 0px 0px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(136, 206, 255); cursor: pointer; height: 18px; transition: background-color 0.1s ease-in, border-color 0.1s ease-in; width: 18px;">
</div>
</div>
<div class="w-handle-outer" style="left: 314px; margin-left: -48px; padding: 5px 20px 0px; position: absolute; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-handle ui-draggable-handle" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/grips-sde380c0a0d.png"); background-position: 50% -15px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(149, 211, 255); cursor: move; height: 15px; transition: background-color 0.05s ease-in, border-color 0.05s ease-in; width: 55px;">
</div>
</div>
<div class="w-delete-outer" style="padding: 5px 5px 10px 10px; position: absolute; right: -13px; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-delete" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/icons-s16342f837d.png"); background-position: 0px -90px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(136, 206, 255); cursor: pointer; height: 18px; transition: background-color 0.1s ease-in, border-color 0.1s ease-in; width: 18px;" title="Delete">
</div>
</div>
</div>
<div class="element-box" style="border-radius: 4px; box-shadow: transparent 0px 0px 0px 1px; transition: box-shadow 0.2s ease;">
<div class="element-box-contents" style="transition: padding 0.5s;">
<div class="element" id="453062770234943528">
<div class="wsite-image wsite-image-border-none " style="margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 10px; padding-top: 10px; position: relative; text-align: right;">
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published"></a><br />
<div class="ui-wrapper" style="display: inline-block; height: 418px; left: 0px; margin: 0px; overflow: visible; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: middle; width: 628px;">
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published"><img alt="Picture" class="ui-draggable-handle ui-resizable" src="https://32113711-919993281549582241.preview.editmysite.com/uploads/3/2/1/1/32113711/img-5789_2_orig.jpg" style="border: 0px; display: block; height: 418px; margin: 0px !important; max-width: 100%; position: static; resize: none; vertical-align: middle; width: 628px; zoom: 1;" /></a></div>
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published">
</a><br />
<div style="font-size: 13.5px;">
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</li>
<li class="inside wsite-image wsite-image-move" id="inside_281842733193275164" style="background: transparent !important; list-style: none; margin: 0px 0px 10px; padding: 0px; position: relative; transition: padding 0.5s, transform 0.5s;"><div class="w-element-controls" style="-webkit-user-select: none; left: 0px; opacity: 0; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: visibility 0s ease 0.2s, opacity 0.2s ease; visibility: hidden; z-index: 11;">
<div class="w-move-outer" style="left: -13px; padding: 5px 10px 10px 5px; position: absolute; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-move" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/icons-s16342f837d.png"); background-position: 0px 0px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(136, 206, 255); cursor: pointer; height: 18px; transition: background-color 0.1s ease-in, border-color 0.1s ease-in; width: 18px;">
</div>
</div>
<div class="w-handle-outer" style="left: 314px; margin-left: -48px; padding: 5px 20px 0px; position: absolute; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-handle ui-draggable-handle" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/grips-sde380c0a0d.png"); background-position: 50% -15px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(149, 211, 255); cursor: move; height: 15px; transition: background-color 0.05s ease-in, border-color 0.05s ease-in; width: 55px;">
</div>
</div>
<div class="w-delete-outer" style="padding: 5px 5px 10px 10px; position: absolute; right: -13px; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-delete" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/icons-s16342f837d.png"); background-position: 0px -90px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(136, 206, 255); cursor: pointer; height: 18px; transition: background-color 0.1s ease-in, border-color 0.1s ease-in; width: 18px;" title="Delete">
</div>
</div>
</div>
<div class="element-box" style="border-radius: 4px; box-shadow: transparent 0px 0px 0px 1px; transition: box-shadow 0.2s ease;">
<div class="element-box-contents" style="transition: padding 0.5s;">
<div class="element" id="463711605382403745">
<div class="wsite-image wsite-image-border-none " style="margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 10px; padding-top: 10px; position: relative; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published"></a><br />
<div class="ui-wrapper" style="display: inline-block; height: 418px; left: 0px; margin: 0px; overflow: visible; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: middle; width: 628px;">
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published"><img alt="Picture" class="ui-draggable-handle ui-resizable" src="https://32113711-919993281549582241.preview.editmysite.com/uploads/3/2/1/1/32113711/img-5795_orig.jpg" style="border: 0px; display: block; height: 418px; margin: 0px !important; max-width: 100%; position: static; resize: none; vertical-align: middle; width: 628px; zoom: 1;" /></a></div>
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published">
</a><br />
<div style="font-size: 13.5px;">
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</li>
<li class="inside wsite-image wsite-image-move" id="inside_204172955256204277" style="background: transparent !important; list-style: none; margin: 0px 0px 10px; padding: 0px; position: relative; transition: padding 0.5s, transform 0.5s;"><div class="w-element-controls" style="-webkit-user-select: none; left: 0px; opacity: 0; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: visibility 0s ease 0.2s, opacity 0.2s ease; visibility: hidden; z-index: 11;">
<div class="w-move-outer" style="left: -13px; padding: 5px 10px 10px 5px; position: absolute; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-move" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/icons-s16342f837d.png"); background-position: 0px 0px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(136, 206, 255); cursor: pointer; height: 18px; transition: background-color 0.1s ease-in, border-color 0.1s ease-in; width: 18px;">
</div>
</div>
<div class="w-handle-outer" style="left: 314px; margin-left: -48px; padding: 5px 20px 0px; position: absolute; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-handle ui-draggable-handle" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/grips-sde380c0a0d.png"); background-position: 50% -15px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(149, 211, 255); cursor: move; height: 15px; transition: background-color 0.05s ease-in, border-color 0.05s ease-in; width: 55px;">
</div>
</div>
<div class="w-delete-outer" style="padding: 5px 5px 10px 10px; position: absolute; right: -13px; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-delete" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/icons-s16342f837d.png"); background-position: 0px -90px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(136, 206, 255); cursor: pointer; height: 18px; transition: background-color 0.1s ease-in, border-color 0.1s ease-in; width: 18px;" title="Delete">
</div>
</div>
</div>
<div class="element-box" style="border-radius: 4px; box-shadow: transparent 0px 0px 0px 1px; transition: box-shadow 0.2s ease;">
<div class="element-box-contents" style="transition: padding 0.5s;">
<div class="element" id="707923339700591649">
<div class="wsite-image wsite-image-border-none " style="margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 10px; padding-top: 10px; position: relative; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published"></a><br />
<div class="ui-wrapper" style="display: inline-block; height: 418px; left: 0px; margin: 0px; overflow: visible; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: middle; width: 628px;">
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published"><img alt="Picture" class="ui-draggable-handle ui-resizable" src="https://32113711-919993281549582241.preview.editmysite.com/uploads/3/2/1/1/32113711/img-5814_orig.jpg" style="border: 0px; display: block; height: 418px; margin: 0px !important; max-width: 100%; position: static; resize: none; vertical-align: middle; width: 628px; zoom: 1;" /></a></div>
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published">
</a><br />
<div style="font-size: 13.5px;">
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</li>
<li class="inside wsite-image wsite-image-move" id="inside_158198241815357090" style="background: transparent !important; list-style: none; margin: 0px 0px 10px; padding: 0px; position: relative; transition: padding 0.5s, transform 0.5s;"><div class="w-element-controls" style="-webkit-user-select: none; left: 0px; opacity: 0; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: visibility 0s ease 0.2s, opacity 0.2s ease; visibility: hidden; z-index: 11;">
<div class="w-move-outer" style="left: -13px; padding: 5px 10px 10px 5px; position: absolute; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-move" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/icons-s16342f837d.png"); background-position: 0px 0px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(136, 206, 255); cursor: pointer; height: 18px; transition: background-color 0.1s ease-in, border-color 0.1s ease-in; width: 18px;">
</div>
</div>
<div class="w-handle-outer" style="left: 314px; margin-left: -48px; padding: 5px 20px 0px; position: absolute; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-handle ui-draggable-handle" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/grips-sde380c0a0d.png"); background-position: 50% -15px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(149, 211, 255); cursor: move; height: 15px; transition: background-color 0.05s ease-in, border-color 0.05s ease-in; width: 55px;">
</div>
</div>
<div class="w-delete-outer" style="padding: 5px 5px 10px 10px; position: absolute; right: -13px; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-delete" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/icons-s16342f837d.png"); background-position: 0px -90px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(136, 206, 255); cursor: pointer; height: 18px; transition: background-color 0.1s ease-in, border-color 0.1s ease-in; width: 18px;" title="Delete">
</div>
</div>
</div>
<div class="element-box" style="border-radius: 4px; box-shadow: transparent 0px 0px 0px 1px; transition: box-shadow 0.2s ease;">
<div class="element-box-contents" style="transition: padding 0.5s;">
<div class="element" id="254643096494019961">
<div class="wsite-image wsite-image-border-none " style="margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 10px; padding-top: 10px; position: relative; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published"></a><br />
<div class="ui-wrapper" style="display: inline-block; height: 418px; left: 0px; margin: 0px; overflow: visible; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: middle; width: 628px;">
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published"><img alt="Picture" class="ui-draggable-handle ui-resizable" src="https://32113711-919993281549582241.preview.editmysite.com/uploads/3/2/1/1/32113711/img-5821_1_orig.jpg" style="border: 0px; display: block; height: 418px; margin: 0px !important; max-width: 100%; position: static; resize: none; vertical-align: middle; width: 628px; zoom: 1;" /></a></div>
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published">
</a><br />
<div style="font-size: 13.5px;">
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</li>
<li class="inside wsite-image wsite-image-move" id="inside_303024322877011416" style="background: transparent !important; list-style: none; margin: 0px 0px 10px; padding: 0px; position: relative; transition: padding 0.5s, transform 0.5s;"><div class="w-element-controls" style="-webkit-user-select: none; left: 0px; opacity: 0; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: visibility 0s ease 0.2s, opacity 0.2s ease; visibility: hidden; z-index: 11;">
<div class="w-move-outer" style="left: -13px; padding: 5px 10px 10px 5px; position: absolute; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-move" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/icons-s16342f837d.png"); background-position: 0px 0px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(136, 206, 255); cursor: pointer; height: 18px; transition: background-color 0.1s ease-in, border-color 0.1s ease-in; width: 18px;">
</div>
</div>
<div class="w-handle-outer" style="left: 314px; margin-left: -48px; padding: 5px 20px 0px; position: absolute; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-handle ui-draggable-handle" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/grips-sde380c0a0d.png"); background-position: 50% -15px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(149, 211, 255); cursor: move; height: 15px; transition: background-color 0.05s ease-in, border-color 0.05s ease-in; width: 55px;">
</div>
</div>
<div class="w-delete-outer" style="padding: 5px 5px 10px 10px; position: absolute; right: -13px; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-delete" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/icons-s16342f837d.png"); background-position: 0px -90px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(136, 206, 255); cursor: pointer; height: 18px; transition: background-color 0.1s ease-in, border-color 0.1s ease-in; width: 18px;" title="Delete">
</div>
</div>
</div>
<div class="element-box" style="border-radius: 4px; box-shadow: transparent 0px 0px 0px 1px; transition: box-shadow 0.2s ease;">
<div class="element-box-contents" style="transition: padding 0.5s;">
<div class="element" id="540929676696247872">
<div class="wsite-image wsite-image-border-none " style="margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 10px; padding-top: 10px; position: relative; text-align: left;">
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published"></a><br />
<div class="ui-wrapper" style="display: inline-block; height: 418px; left: 0px; margin: 0px; overflow: visible; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: middle; width: 628px;">
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published"><img alt="Picture" class="ui-draggable-handle ui-resizable" src="https://32113711-919993281549582241.preview.editmysite.com/uploads/3/2/1/1/32113711/img-5829_orig.jpg" style="border: 0px; display: block; height: 418px; margin: 0px !important; max-width: 100%; position: static; resize: none; vertical-align: middle; width: 628px; zoom: 1;" /></a></div>
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published">
</a><br />
<div style="font-size: 13.5px;">
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</li>
<li class="inside wsite-image wsite-image-move" id="inside_967842053137813004" style="background: transparent !important; list-style: none; margin: 0px 0px 10px; padding: 0px; position: relative; transition: padding 0.5s, transform 0.5s;"><div class="w-element-controls" style="-webkit-user-select: none; left: 0px; opacity: 0; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: visibility 0s ease 0.2s, opacity 0.2s ease; visibility: hidden; z-index: 11;">
<div class="w-move-outer" style="left: -13px; padding: 5px 10px 10px 5px; position: absolute; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-move" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/icons-s16342f837d.png"); background-position: 0px 0px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(136, 206, 255); cursor: pointer; height: 18px; transition: background-color 0.1s ease-in, border-color 0.1s ease-in; width: 18px;">
</div>
</div>
<div class="w-handle-outer" style="left: 314px; margin-left: -48px; padding: 5px 20px 0px; position: absolute; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-handle ui-draggable-handle" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/grips-sde380c0a0d.png"); background-position: 50% -15px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(149, 211, 255); cursor: move; height: 15px; transition: background-color 0.05s ease-in, border-color 0.05s ease-in; width: 55px;">
</div>
</div>
<div class="w-delete-outer" style="padding: 5px 5px 10px 10px; position: absolute; right: -13px; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-delete" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/icons-s16342f837d.png"); background-position: 0px -90px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(136, 206, 255); cursor: pointer; height: 18px; transition: background-color 0.1s ease-in, border-color 0.1s ease-in; width: 18px;" title="Delete">
</div>
</div>
</div>
<div class="element-box" style="border-radius: 4px; box-shadow: transparent 0px 0px 0px 1px; transition: box-shadow 0.2s ease;">
<div class="element-box-contents" style="transition: padding 0.5s;">
<div class="element" id="836318378481193238">
<div class="wsite-image wsite-image-border-none " style="margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 10px; padding-top: 10px; position: relative; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published"></a><br />
<div class="ui-wrapper" style="display: inline-block; height: 800px; left: 0px; margin: 0px; overflow: visible; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: middle; width: 533px;">
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published"><img alt="Picture" class="ui-draggable-handle ui-resizable" src="https://32113711-919993281549582241.preview.editmysite.com/uploads/3/2/1/1/32113711/img-5842_orig.jpg" style="border: 0px; display: block; height: 800px; margin: 0px !important; max-width: 100%; position: static; resize: none; vertical-align: middle; width: 533px; zoom: 1;" /></a></div>
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published">
</a><br />
<div style="font-size: 13.5px;">
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</li>
<li class="inside wsite-image wsite-image-move" id="inside_119847294414828255" style="background: transparent !important; list-style: none; margin: 0px 0px 10px; padding: 0px; position: relative; transition: padding 0.5s, transform 0.5s;"><div class="w-element-controls" style="-webkit-user-select: none; left: 0px; opacity: 0; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: visibility 0s ease 0.2s, opacity 0.2s ease; visibility: hidden; z-index: 11;">
<div class="w-move-outer" style="left: -13px; padding: 5px 10px 10px 5px; position: absolute; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-move" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/icons-s16342f837d.png"); background-position: 0px 0px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(136, 206, 255); cursor: pointer; height: 18px; transition: background-color 0.1s ease-in, border-color 0.1s ease-in; width: 18px;">
</div>
</div>
<div class="w-handle-outer" style="left: 314px; margin-left: -48px; padding: 5px 20px 0px; position: absolute; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-handle ui-draggable-handle" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/grips-sde380c0a0d.png"); background-position: 50% -15px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(149, 211, 255); cursor: move; height: 15px; transition: background-color 0.05s ease-in, border-color 0.05s ease-in; width: 55px;">
</div>
</div>
<div class="w-delete-outer" style="padding: 5px 5px 10px 10px; position: absolute; right: -13px; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-delete" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/icons-s16342f837d.png"); background-position: 0px -90px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(136, 206, 255); cursor: pointer; height: 18px; transition: background-color 0.1s ease-in, border-color 0.1s ease-in; width: 18px;" title="Delete">
</div>
</div>
</div>
<div class="element-box" style="border-radius: 4px; box-shadow: transparent 0px 0px 0px 1px; transition: box-shadow 0.2s ease;">
<div class="element-box-contents" style="transition: padding 0.5s;">
<div class="element" id="861611602814441548">
<div class="wsite-image wsite-image-border-none " style="margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 10px; padding-top: 10px; position: relative; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published"></a><br />
<div class="ui-wrapper" style="display: inline-block; height: 800px; left: 0px; margin: 0px; overflow: visible; position: relative; top: 0px; vertical-align: middle; width: 533px;">
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published"><img alt="Picture" class="ui-draggable-handle ui-resizable" src="https://32113711-919993281549582241.preview.editmysite.com/uploads/3/2/1/1/32113711/img-5846_orig.jpg" style="border: 0px; display: block; height: 800px; margin: 0px !important; max-width: 100%; position: static; resize: none; vertical-align: middle; width: 533px; zoom: 1;" /></a></div>
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" style="color: #5199a8; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published">
</a><br />
<div style="font-size: 13.5px;">
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</li>
<li class="inside wsite-text" id="inside_735745052760148948" style="background: transparent !important; list-style: none; margin: 0px 0px 10px; padding: 0px; position: relative; transition: padding 0.5s, transform 0.5s;"><div class="w-element-controls" style="-webkit-user-select: none; left: 0px; opacity: 0; position: absolute; right: 0px; top: 0px; transition: visibility 0s ease 0.2s, opacity 0.2s ease; visibility: hidden; z-index: 11;">
<div class="w-move-outer" style="left: -13px; padding: 5px 10px 10px 5px; position: absolute; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-move" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/icons-s16342f837d.png"); background-position: 0px 0px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(136, 206, 255); cursor: pointer; height: 18px; transition: background-color 0.1s ease-in, border-color 0.1s ease-in; width: 18px;">
</div>
</div>
<div class="w-handle-outer" style="left: 314px; margin-left: -48px; padding: 5px 20px 0px; position: absolute; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-handle ui-draggable-handle" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/grips-sde380c0a0d.png"); background-position: 50% -15px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(149, 211, 255); cursor: move; height: 15px; transition: background-color 0.05s ease-in, border-color 0.05s ease-in; width: 55px;">
</div>
</div>
<div class="w-delete-outer" style="padding: 5px 5px 10px 10px; position: absolute; right: -13px; top: -13px;">
<div class="w-delete" style="background-image: url("../sprites/editor/elements/controls/icons-s16342f837d.png"); background-position: 0px -90px; background-repeat: no-repeat; border-radius: 2px; border: 1px solid rgb(136, 206, 255); cursor: pointer; height: 18px; transition: background-color 0.1s ease-in, border-color 0.1s ease-in; width: 18px;" title="Delete">
</div>
</div>
</div>
<div class="element-box" style="border-radius: 4px; box-shadow: transparent 0px 0px 0px 1px; transition: box-shadow 0.2s ease;">
<div class="element-box-contents" style="transition: padding 0.5s;">
<div class="element paragraph editable-text" id="699271330446414624" style="line-height: 1.5; margin: 0px auto 1em; outline: none; padding: 0px;">
Muse: Kenzie Hardin<br />
Assistant: Sheba Vallone </div>
</div>
</div>
</li>
</ul>
</div>
<div class="clear" style="clear: both;">
</div>
</div>
<div class="blog-social editor-blog-social " style="line-height: 1; margin: 0px 0px 10px; pointer-events: none; position: relative;">
<div class="blog-social-item blog-fb-like" style="float: left; margin-right: 33px; position: relative; z-index: 2;">
<fb:like action="like" class=" fb_iframe_widget" fb-iframe-plugin-query="action=like&app_id=190291501407&container_width=0&href=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.blushboudoirbyjanav.com%2F2%2Fpost%2F2016%2F09%2Fevolve.html&layout=button_count&locale=en_US&sdk=joey&share=false&show_faces=false&width=90" fb-xfbml-state="parsed" href="http://www.blushboudoirbyjanav.com/2/post/2016/09/evolve.html" layout="button_count" share="false" show_faces="false" style="display: inline-block; position: relative;" width="90"><span style="display: inline-block; height: 0px; overflow: hidden; position: relative; text-align: justify; vertical-align: top; width: 0px;"><iframe allowfullscreen="true" allowtransparency="true" frameborder="0" height="1000px" name="f9196e31a2ca8" scrolling="no" src="https://www.facebook.com/v2.6/plugins/like.php?action=like&app_id=190291501407&channel=https%3A%2F%2Fstaticxx.facebook.com%2Fconnect%2Fxd_arbiter%2Fr%2FuN4_cXtJDGb.js%3Fversion%3D42%23cb%3Df440408b588d68%26domain%3D32113711-919993281549582241.preview.editmysite.com%26origin%3Dhttps%253A%252F%252F32113711-919993281549582241.preview.editmysite.com%252Ff1aa1639b113ab8%26relation%3Dparent.parent&container_width=0&href=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.blushboudoirbyjanav.com%2F2%2Fpost%2F2016%2F09%2Fevolve.html&layout=button_count&locale=en_US&sdk=joey&share=false&show_faces=false&width=90" style="border-style: none; border-width: initial; position: absolute; visibility: hidden;" title="fb:like Facebook Social Plugin" width="90px"></iframe></span></fb:like></div>
<div class="blog-social-item" style="float: left; margin-right: 33px; position: relative; z-index: 2;">
<iframe allowtransparency="true" class="twitter-share-button twitter-count-horizontal" frameborder="0" scrolling="no" src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets/tweet_button.html?_=1473006561993&count=horizontal&id=twitter_tweet_button_0&land=en&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.blushboudoirbyjanav.com%2F2%2Fpost%2F2016%2F09%2Fevolve.html&text=Evolve%20-%20Blush%20Boudoir%20&%20Intimate%20Portraits%20By%20Jana%20Vallone" style="height: 20px; width: 110px;"></iframe></div>
<div style="clear: both;">
</div>
</div>
<div class="blog-comments-bottom" style="font-size: 13px; margin: 0px 0px 40px;">
<a class="blog-link" href="https://32113711-919993281549582241.preview.editmysite.com/editor/main.php#comments" style="color: #5199a8; text-decoration: none; transition: all 0.2s ease-in-out;" title="Links active once published">0 Comments</a></div>
<div class="blog-post-separator">
</div>
</div>
<div class="no-comments" style="background: rgb(238, 238, 238); color: #666666; font-size: 15px; line-height: 1.5; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; padding: 8px 0px; text-align: center;">
No comments posted</div>
</div>
</td><td class="blog-sidebar" style="padding-left: 60px; width: 215px;" valign="top"><br /></td></tr>
</tbody></table>
</ul>
</div>
Janahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17681902597194726962noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1165576307254676741.post-46424203943316887602014-05-16T12:25:00.000-04:002014-05-16T12:26:00.616-04:00Progress.....<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEghVK8Uhr5lptpfram69rRCgr3Ntdn8_Ej_xm_p8iJv0Q1t9VhYtSUVGt7jsVegR0YECzik2tKyRiNhHvGYGvrkyLpGrTIuxgRoMIlDmcE3JCa_ubnDI5J-kafkDQQTZrKILg_07q2ScqZu/s1600/card.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEghVK8Uhr5lptpfram69rRCgr3Ntdn8_Ej_xm_p8iJv0Q1t9VhYtSUVGt7jsVegR0YECzik2tKyRiNhHvGYGvrkyLpGrTIuxgRoMIlDmcE3JCa_ubnDI5J-kafkDQQTZrKILg_07q2ScqZu/s1600/card.jpg" height="320" width="212" /></a></div>
<br />
<br />
It happens every year....right about this time.<br />
My focus drifts.<br />
My doubts stir.<br />
My mind starts to wander.<br />
<br />
Did we DO enough math?<br />
Baking counts as Home EC right?<br />
Does walking around downtown count as a field trip? really?<br />
Should I have read more to them?<br />
Did we get in enough writing?<br />
Science experiments we can be made up in the summer...right?<br />
essentially...<br />
What I am trying to wrap my head around is....<br />
Are they "smart enough"? <br />
Did we make progress?<br />
Is it ENOUGH?<br />
Which can quickly spiral into ...<br />
"Am I enough?" followed by "Who am I kidding? I'm not smart enough to DO this!!!"<br />
<br />
I know.<br />
Don't judge.<br />
I'm giving you a window here...LOL.<br />
<br />
I try and reassure myself that:<br />
1. I AM SMART ENOUGH.<br />
2. I AM ENOUGH.<br />
and <br />
3. I CAN do this.<br />
<br />
But the reality is....<br />
I doubt. I stew. I lose sleep. I WORRY...ALOT.<br />
I want to be the kind of homeschool mom who is completely confident and has her shit together.<br />
Sometimes I do.<br />
But...lots of times..<br />
I don't.<br />
Lots of times those positive posts on facebook are directed TO me...from ME.<br />
Trust me....the battle I fight inside my self is constant.<br />
I figure that's what saves me. If I worry and stress about how good of a job I'm doing...I MUST be doing it right. Right?<br />
<br />
So I spend days and nights praying that it was enough.<br />
Praying that this year...we made progress.<br />
Praying that were better off than where we started.<br />
That's what I want.<br />
Progress.<br />
<br />
And that's usually when it happens....<br />
Life throws me a sign.<br />
A glimmer of hope that it was a success.<br />
<br />
This year it was when I walked into the room and Zeek was doing a FLVS(Fl.Virtual school ) collaborative lesson.<br />
They have to do these 2 times a year. They get on with their teacher and a bunch of students and have a virtual lesson...where they type and speak to one another. Answer questions, etc.<br />
Its all very Jetsons to me...but we're there.<br />
They were learning how to write and an argumentative essay.<br />
They had to choose a side of and issue and write a paper arguing WHY their side was right, using research, quotes, stats, etc.<br />
The issue was......<br />
Should kids be made to volunteer in their community in order to graduate?<br />
<br />
So I walked into the room and Zeek has his arms crossed and isn't typing when everyone else in the "chatroom" is.<br />
"Why aren't you typing? aren't you supposed to be typing and participating?" I said to him.<br />
He looked at me and said, "Not right now. All these people think that you SHOULDN'T have to volunteer in order to graduate. I'm not typing because I'm the ONLY one who doesn't think that."<br />
<br />
I love him.<br />
<br />
Then I stood there and listened as the students one by one came on the microphone and spoke about the fact that kids shouldn't be forced to do things they don't want to do, they should do things that come from THEIR heart...not because they are being MADE to.<br />
<br />
I heard a kid say that those things aren't important to getting a job and being in the "real world".<br />
<br />
Some one said that getting an education and getting SMART was a kids job...not helping people who wont help themselves.<br />
Blah Blah Blah.<br />
<br />
<br />
WOW.<br />
What a world.<br />
<br />
And there Zeek STOOD.....arms crossed and not typing.<br />
<br />
He stood on the other side.....the RIGHT side.<br />
<br />
His chart was filled with reasons that you SHOULD be made to volunteer before graduating.<br />
<br />
he said ...<br />
"Helping people makes the world a better place."<br />
"Volunteering helps you see how good you have it in your life."<br />
"Teenagers have a lot of energy and they need to use it doing something good."<br />
<br />
WOW.<br />
What a world indeed.<br />
<br />
An education of the heart is as important, if not more...as an education of the mind.<br />
<br />
And that my friends....is PROGRESS.<br />
Progress enough for me.<br />
<br />
At that moment...<br />
My eyes filled with tears and the doubt ran down my cheeks.<br />
<br />
I stood there behind him and knew we were fine.<br />
We passed.<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br /><br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
Janahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17681902597194726962noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1165576307254676741.post-85266640237377209422014-04-25T12:05:00.002-04:002014-04-25T12:10:17.889-04:00 On the inside....<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjn91OyZoDRCMYMHheqFxr3qoT2jcmo70g248TZ1csan6WiYl0mzp7WEmSkII5M04bf9DXRjQgsm5qu2FBKk4JHAfkW0uuExF6atSmnPJXJ4KMg-zSDMWQipvEK7uXitzh6j3Z7Q_K9wZlL/s1600/tdcwdw.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjn91OyZoDRCMYMHheqFxr3qoT2jcmo70g248TZ1csan6WiYl0mzp7WEmSkII5M04bf9DXRjQgsm5qu2FBKk4JHAfkW0uuExF6atSmnPJXJ4KMg-zSDMWQipvEK7uXitzh6j3Z7Q_K9wZlL/s1600/tdcwdw.jpg" height="202" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
I found her in the living room silently crying.<br />
Her tears were evidence that what she thought she would be "fine" with...she wasn't.<br />
You see...sometimes things are easier to wrap your mind around when they are far away.<br />
Sometimes......we convince ourselves of things that we know aren't true.<br />
Its easy to do that...<br />
out <br />
of<br />
sight<br />
out <br />
of <br />
mind.<br />
In this situation..that is exactly what we did...<br />
This is what happened:<br />
Every year our dance team performs at Disneyworld.<br />
They become "honorary cast members" for the day.<br />
It is an amazing experience that they all cherish.<br />
They get to perform on the stage one day and they get to visit one of the parks on another day.<br />
So so cool.<br />
Well....<br />
Early on in the year we were told what the dates for our performance were.<br />
Ugh...<br />
it was AFTER our passes expired.<br />
Panic started to set in.<br />
We were not going to be able to afford it without those beloved Disney passes.<br />
So ...in my mind...somewhere between the dance studio and the house I had worked up a very good argument..sorta.<br />
I decided that I would toss the idea up there about NOT going with the team to the parks but just driving up on the day of the performance to Orlando, performing, and then simply driving home.<br />
Sounds good right?<br />
I had all my reasons: <br />
*so expensive<br />
*weve been to WDW a bunch of times<br />
*the boys would die if we went without them<br />
*it was easter weekend soooo...it would be crowded.<br />
I mean...<br />
I had it all worked out. It was going to be fine. She was going to be fine. I was going to be fine.<br />
HA! What a dummy I am. LOL!<br />
We sat around the dinner table that night and I plead my case. <br />
I explains all my reasons and she said YES! I didn't get an "excited" yes...but it was a "yes". <br />
OK...In my mind (HA!) all was well in my little home.<br />
About 4 months came and went with little mention of the Disney trip...then:<br />
THAT morning came and everything seemed fine.<br />
The birds were chirping, roosters were crowing, and again...all was well.....<br />
Until I found her curled up on the couch with her ipod looking at instagram.<br />
UGH. Instagram.<br />
Her whole team was posting pics of themselves all cute and ...AT ANIMAL KINGDOM.<br />
I mean....like jumping in the air, matching shirts, so excited, super cute...pictures.<br />
And she was heartbroken.<br />
And ...<br />
so.<br />
was.<br />
I.<br />
I wanted to take it back. I wanted to change my mind.<br />
DO OVER PLEASE!!!!<br />
I sat next to her and apologized.<br />
I was truly sorry.<br />
Not because she didn't get to go to Disney.<br />
We go to Disney.<br />
But I was sorry because I had underestimated the importance of the TEAM part.<br />
In making that choice for us in this situation....I had put her on the outside.<br />
I had alienated her from her team.<br />
It broke my heart that I, as the mom, had done that.<br />
I should have known that making the choices I have made for my life have already put her ...on the outside of a lot of situations.<br />
My choice In this was made because I failed to see the importance...<br />
not the importance of DISNEY...but of walking thru the park hand in hand with your bestie.<br />
not the importance of roller coasters..but of running to look at the pictures of yourselves after the roller coaster.<br />
THAT is where the importance is.<br />
Its being part of a GOOD TEAM that has turned into family.<br />
Its feeling like you are on the INSIDE of something special.<br />
Its in the memories that you take home with you.<br />
Its the feelings that you cant put a price tag on.<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />Janahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17681902597194726962noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1165576307254676741.post-76521007022769352382013-11-02T10:59:00.001-04:002013-11-02T10:59:05.584-04:00Do some GOOD today…<p><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi0uIvjRiL9OtuRAIVLy2u8lLEtAuKkcRiQklG34_XH1FqK2CW5eSGTVhtmV9LdJc-OiCF-9siRmdZj7X_iU4MAcmKQhdlYm41aRSb-xLz_2VRcDE27XnKI3bkhj6eTtJfdXp8htTGaJtul/s1600-h/shoes%25255B3%25255D.jpg"><img title="shoes" style="border-top: 0px; border-right: 0px; background-image: none; border-bottom: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding-left: 0px; margin: 0px 0px 5px; border-left: 0px; display: inline; padding-right: 0px" border="0" alt="shoes" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjdQoInkfdTWkjHbFuP2M7pxLSufZn9V177kk5ERYKF3N8SzZRROP6Z5P5iVfQG777WxOozkUkLBOm12p_sQyD30e7-TJ1HDsrJiez1b-TCk9owCYIDo4tvTaARq1pzL5VnlPzI6TcGTr_g//?imgmax=800" width="410" height="407" /></a></p> <p>Poverty. <br />It UGLY and we ignore it. <br />We choose to. <br />Because we can. <br />We live in a place that works hard to "GET RID OF" the problem. <br />We live in a place that works hard to keep the homeless man off the street....so we don't have to be REMINDED. <br />Some don't want THAT reality staring them in the face while they are trying to get a latte'. <br />Maybe it is the fear. Poeple fear what they don't understand. <br />All the while most of us are 1 or 2 paychecks away from the life of THAT man. <br />Sooo.... <br />Most Americans cannot wrap their minds around true poverty. <br />The kind that is HEAVY with despair and pain. <br />The kind that SUFFOCATES people. <br />The kind that keeps SHACKLES around feet that are already covered in MUD. <br />The kind that FORCES a Mother to GIVE UP her child to and orphanage...so the child will LIVE. <br />The kind that FORCES a woman to sell her body so that she can EAT mud biscuits. <br />Most cannot UNDERSTAND because they have never looked into the EYES of a poverty-stricken child....outside of a infomercial. <br />People are SMUG. They are PRIDEFUL. <br />Because they want to think that something LIKE THAT could NEVER happen to us in the good ole' USA. <br />It can and will...someday. <br />In the meantime .....we need to EXPOSE ourselves to the TRUTH. <br />Its UGLY....but it's THERE. <br />It can't be ignored. <br />God wants us to help those that are in need. <br />We are called to help those who need help. <br />We need to be cleansed. <br />We need to let HIM wash away all the misconceptions and lies thet permeate our thoughts about POVERTY. <br />We need to let go of GREED and loosen our hands of our TIME and MONEY. <br />No more sitting back and saying... <br />next month I'll send that donation. <br />No more sitting back and saying... <br />next time Ill give that man a dollar. <br />Because tommorow is never promised. <br />You never know when you will find YOURSELF in invisible shackles that hold you down. <br />So I am calling you today to open your hearts. <br />Help SOMEONE. <br />DO SOMETHING. <br />TODAY. <br />NOW. <br />Spread the LOVE....... </p> Janahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17681902597194726962noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1165576307254676741.post-21603761023607031552013-10-29T15:03:00.001-04:002013-10-29T17:23:24.156-04:00Stepping back in….a bit.<p><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhu4hxyRnLSt2GyrZZuELlgJ8N6Me2YP9HKYn1zPRYMscbFUQJou6CdO5vghsChDLl9OfCBM0O1tYLRJxUn_8J46Qoy_XgZLLjoDom_Y7pkUiz1z99qhgDrulxaJGnAgE-gNB4IGDtGj_ux/s1600-h/girl-walking-out-door%25255B3%25255D.jpg"><img title="girl-walking-out-door" style="border-top: 0px; border-right: 0px; background-image: none; border-bottom: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding-left: 0px; margin: 0px 0px 5px; border-left: 0px; display: inline; padding-right: 0px" border="0" alt="girl-walking-out-door" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgRWOr2sbjgBwWR2DKTE4wEZBdtUgdjgSpTMFgj6N1xqqJDbMXGGJSZqJ8G-mugOVRKj3J2xkV0lRcixeLXW3Gz5M0IKWkCt4zVzai49I6EDHnOvniB8x6Ey8QNboewiqOqLsvGz-asGQzS//?imgmax=800" width="364" height="484" /></a></p> <p> </p> <p>My life has been a series of twists and turns.</p> <p>I grew up with a typical upper middle class American upbringing.</p> <p>And had tons of typical middle class American teenage fun… too much actually.</p> <p>Solo much “fun” that when I came face to face with myself  at 21….I didn’t recognize WHO I WAS.</p> <p>I had seen the inside of too many smoky rooms.</p> <p>Been on the wrong side of too many decisions.</p> <p>Had to sit and think to remember too many nights.</p> <p>Lived too much for any girl.</p> <p>It</p> <p>was</p> <p>amazing</p> <p>and</p> <p>heartbreaking</p> <p>all</p> <p>at</p> <p>the</p> <p>same</p> <p>time.</p> <p>I had the time of my life and then that life had no more time.</p> <p>I was confronted by God….and had no choice but to change.</p> <p>ENTIRELY.</p> <p>From outside to within…..everything about me changed.</p> <p>I decided that my life basically needed to be devoted ONLY to my faith.</p> <p>I had no more time for anything but TRUTH.</p> <p>Because I had been lying.</p> <p>I decided that everything in my life had to have a purpose….if it wasn’t completely TRUE and honest….I was not participating.</p> <p>DONE.</p> <p>That was at 21.  </p> <p>I spent most of the next year traveling in Costa Rica.  I loved it.  I was in love and was being true to myself and God.</p> <p>But…my views were wound pretty tight.  Air tight actually.</p> <p>Then we started having kids and held strong to our beliefs.  They never have had Santa come visit them, never gotten money from the “tooth fairy”, never gotten an Easter basket, and never participated in Halloween.</p> <p>I know…..</p> <p>GASP!!!</p> <p>Believe me…..they are not upset.</p> <p>It has been their life.</p> <p>They are used to it.</p> <p>They never HAD IT….so they know NO DIFFERENCE.</p> <p>I have spent the last 13 years teaching them what I know as TRUTH about holidays and the reasons behind them.</p> <p>AND</p> <p>I realize that MOST PEOPLE celebrate these holidays with fun and love in their hearts.</p> <p>But MY JOURNEY took me the long way around.  I felt like everything but TRUTH had to be stripped away from my life….</p> <p>which left no room for fat men flying EVERYWHERE delivering presents in 1 night.</p> <p>It left no room for cute bunnies who lay eggs or fairies delivering money.</p> <p>It just didn’t….</p> <p>So my children never experienced that.</p> <p>They experienced things like Rastafari’s Birthday, and learning about the solstices, candy sales after Halloween, and the truth BEHIND the holidays.</p> <p>TONS OF FUN RIGHT?</p> <p>LOL</p> <p>Then over the past few years….</p> <p>something started to happen.</p> <p>I started to realize that they pretty much KNEW all the things that I wanted to teach them about the holidays.</p> <p>I KNEW that they were not fooled and that they would not run and REVEAL the holiday secrets to any babies…i.e...Santa.</p> <p>So….slowly we have started to add some of the holiday “stuff” back into our lives.</p> <p>The last few years we have had dinner for Christmas with family</p> <p>and</p> <p>the kids have gotten Christmas gifts from Grandparents</p> <p>they have gotten cards on all holidays from loving family….</p> <p>But never have we had a “Christmas morning” experience.</p> <p>Then we decided that we were comfortable with the whole thing…we were going to Texas for Christmas with my family.</p> <p>HUGE.</p> <p>MAJOR.</p> <p>Like…..they are STILL asking me if we are REALLY coming! LOL</p> <p>And we are….I am finally comfortable with that.</p> <p>I feel like the kids can handle it.  They know that their faith is different…and Christ probably wasn’t born in December.</p> <p>And he DEFINITELY didn’t have a bunch of STUFF.</p> <p>So…its cool now.</p> <p>We can move on…</p> <p>weird right?</p> <p>Halloween was something that they never experienced either….BUT.. they have seen the “Truth about  Halloween”special on the History Channel every year they can remember.</p> <p>Soooooooooo…………….</p> <p>After feeling my life unwind and loosen a bit….</p> <p>Thursday night-</p> <p>We are going trick-or-treating.</p> <p>We are stepping out of our “Comfy Zone”…</p> <p>We are stepping BACK IN …a little.</p> <p>We are testing the waters.</p> <p>I feel so brave and rebellious.</p> <p>Just like the old days….</p> Janahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17681902597194726962noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1165576307254676741.post-23849687585142774792013-10-28T18:18:00.001-04:002013-10-28T18:24:02.451-04:00Cutting her Teeth and Standing Strong<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjeoLWWJUQUb2hu-l-Xrh433hH5kVJ9c-71Xtd786qXQAQDHXnNeQzVv4Fc4dgbC19UHu9_5czVFo3QwFfgt15IYrtKf8W8R0I-gYmj84GYD_2fdpYeIYwmjZVXyMjt4TQfcfNZO1tzK2IM/s1600/stand.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjeoLWWJUQUb2hu-l-Xrh433hH5kVJ9c-71Xtd786qXQAQDHXnNeQzVv4Fc4dgbC19UHu9_5czVFo3QwFfgt15IYrtKf8W8R0I-gYmj84GYD_2fdpYeIYwmjZVXyMjt4TQfcfNZO1tzK2IM/s1600/stand.jpg" /></a></div>
<br />
<br />
<br />
She has begun doing this lately.....<br />
putting her "'foot down".<br />
<br />
For no reason really...I mean what does an 8 year old have to "put her foot down" about really?<br />
<br />
Nothing...she just doesn't KNOW THAT YET.<br />
<br />
She just wants to make a stand.<br />
<br />
She wants to be heard.<br />
<br />
She wants to stand her ground....even when her ground is shaky as SHIT.<br />
<br />
Its something IN HER.....<br />
I can see the strength in her eyes.<br />
She has a hard time backing down...in that moment.<br />
<br />
The other day she was supposed to be cleaning her room....<br />
Supposed <br />
to<br />
be.<br />
<br />
But, you see,....she is the baby of the family.<br />
<br />
For her WHOLE LIFE she has been given a little "leeway".<br />
<br />
She has been picked up after, carried(literally), and "babied" her entire existence.<br />
<br />
But...we have only done that because ....- she only hated INSIDE CHORES.<br />
She would rather be on the roof helping jay, or raking, or hauling wood.<br />
So....I folded her clothes and put up her laundry <br />
I admit it..<br />
I did it fore her.<br />
ALOT.<br />
I figured that she was a HARD WORKER...just not as domestic in the "laundry area".<br />
<br />
But lately.....she has been just plain REFUSING to help her sister clean up their room.<br />
<br />
She will lay around, look at a book, or SLOWLY walk around and act as if she has NO IDEA what needs to be done.<br />
It<br />
is<br />
infuriating.<br />
<br />
Like..."WHO ARE YOU?? And what have you done with my sweet daughter??" Infuriating. UGH.<br />
<br />
Which is what I was thinking when I walked into her room and ALL HER CLOTHES were still on the floor after Shasha had already cleaned up everything else ...just not HER SISTERS CLOTHES.<br />
REALLY? I asked her 15 times...at least.<br />
<br />
She looked at me with a blank look...kinda like a deer in headlights.<br />
<br />
"You have to clean this up. You have to stay IN HERE till you have every bit cleaned up. By yourself." I said, very calmly.<br />
<br />
And then she looked at me calmly with determination seeping from her tiny pores and said, "I guess I'll be in her the rest of my LIFE." <br />
<br />
It was in that moment I didn't know whether to shake her or hug her.<br />
<br />
She was so brave and disobedient.<br />
I know I'm not supposed to love that ....<br />
but<br />
I<br />
do.<br />
<br />
I love it because I know that this girl is a fighter....one day she will stand her ground...<br />
for<br />
something.<br />
<br />
She has will and determination ...and a pretty smile.<br />
Who are we kidding?<br />
There is no stopping her...no matter..<br />
BUT-<br />
<br />
Maybe if I guide her in the right direction and teach her to love the truth...<br />
Maybe if I mold her to love GOD with all her heart....<br />
Maybe if I can teach her to shine her light brightly on injustice....<br />
Maybe if I can show her that love is stronger than hate....<br />
Maybe...all the time I spent letting her "practice" will be worth it.<br />
<br />
Praying that one day....<br />
she will stand for something worthwhile.<br />
<br />
Until then...I will laugh and let her "cut her teeth" on things like laundry and schoolwork, all the while thinking, "Stand strong baby girl ...Stand Strong. One day you will change the world."<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />Janahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17681902597194726962noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1165576307254676741.post-44284657456476709202013-10-02T23:33:00.001-04:002013-10-02T23:37:17.193-04:00Life Lessons…with Katy Perry.<p><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgwlQcB-gCu5aqwhjP5gJNPaWVPYOU7Jou2_kV1iJuJKnLDFoirHUiNoSrM1yvp-0SUkm19qqzMZwhIJJOz7GDm0SzeetbOG3mmyH_YeqSTKiOo3ePEDBRI2Zi3TIcMA9619euOvykF6CtN/s1600-h/katy%25255B3%25255D.jpg"><img title="katy" style="border-top: 0px; border-right: 0px; background-image: none; border-bottom: 0px; float: none; padding-top: 0px; padding-left: 0px; margin: 0px auto 5px; border-left: 0px; display: block; padding-right: 0px" border="0" alt="katy" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjSjY8VnvzbU15yLoRi5OAHpiN15QPlaXSs051M6XhyYPTTPhMhfbr7hQF5CBjdpCQZHsGVognV71b0GNe9pRuEYZbsRWBiLi1pCPx3d9LhEY88xq67PnoAZ3rV1XV0mMyoS9w78If5rhjF//?imgmax=800" width="312" height="344" /></a></p> <p> </p> <p>When you become a parent you can convince yourself of ANYTHING ….I believe it is self preservation.</p> <p>I always “saw” myself (in my mind) as this easy going, lackadaisical, non confrontational parent.</p> <p>I had visions of me TOTALLY  relaxed, school everyday at the beach, never spanking…and NEVER, EVER raising my voice or yelling.</p> <p>Because…..I would be under control, patient, loving, kind, and CALM at all times.</p> <p>Ha.</p> <p>Ha.</p> <p>Ha.</p> <p>Life is hilarious.</p> <p>I guess in my mind I always thought that with children those traits would naturally APPEAR in me.</p> <p>WTH???</p> <p>Who was I kidding?</p> <p>If I have learned 1,754,420 things since starting to <strike>lose my mind </strike> having kids…it is this.</p> <p>I know NOTHING.</p> <p>I never know where life lessons will come from.</p> <p>After being pregnant 4 times, nursing for 8 years, changing countless diapers,refereeing unthought-of of arguments, dealing with sibling rivalry, homeschooling for 8 years, dealing with a teenager, a preteen, a tween, and an 8 year old who thinks she is a preteen(like her sister)and 2 “sex talks”(so far…YIKES!!!)….</p> <p>I STILL only know SLIGHTLY more than nothing.</p> <p>Because …Now I KNOW that I know nothing.</p> <p>This all came to me very clearly the other day during school.</p> <p>During the morning…while they are doing their journaling or drawing…we listen to music.</p> <p>Generally we alternate and everyone picks a song.</p> <p>It always brings in the perfect amount of fun to the morning.  Although to the neighbors …I'm SURE that our schoolroom seems completely bi-polar.</p> <p>We go from…</p> <p>The doors</p> <p>to</p> <p>Red Hot Chili Peppers</p> <p>to</p> <p> Eminem</p> <p>to </p> <p>Gwen Stefani</p> <p>to </p> <p>Bob Marley</p> <p>to </p> <p>Imagine Dragons</p> <p>to</p> <p>Countless other POP singers that I cant remember.</p> <p>It is always a lesson for me in ACCEPTANCE.</p> <p>It takes everything I have to ACCEPT that they like POP MUSIC more than REGGAE.</p> <p>GASP! (Yet another thing I never saw coming.) </p> <p>As they have gotten older…..I have actually embraced this as an opportunity to get to know them better.  I feel like if I listen to what they like WITH THEM…maybe they will listen to ME more.ILLOGICAL…I know.  I try to really listen to songs with them. We break them down word for word sometimes, we analyze the meanings of the lines….which they LOVE. Not.</p> <p>Imagine me deciphering “Royals” by Lorde for them…</p> <div id="scid:5737277B-5D6D-4f48-ABFC-DD9C333F4C5D:ecba7d68-52bd-4119-8803-99442af21acf" class="wlWriterEditableSmartContent" style="float: none; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding-left: 0px; margin: 0px; display: inline; padding-right: 0px"><div id="1ad301aa-e92b-45e9-95c6-6b4d2ac5846e" style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; display: inline;"><div><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nlcIKh6sBtc" target="_new"><img src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiCZedAKb1LVYWOKjptumDRqdNQIJg61OvS_4M21SziH54c2CA23u6oQ2hMSlx8PqomQa2f9HUwGRnoRKV2xzdticM_ILDY8SnEgZqzGbA40-gh5LOusabeNl70nFhYO0EaS9uk57NLX5fx//?imgmax=800" style="border-style: none" galleryimg="no" onload="var downlevelDiv = document.getElementById('1ad301aa-e92b-45e9-95c6-6b4d2ac5846e'); downlevelDiv.innerHTML = "<div><object width=\"448\" height=\"252\"><param name=\"movie\" value=\"http://www.youtube.com/v/nlcIKh6sBtc?hl=en&hd=1\"><\/param><embed src=\"http://www.youtube.com/v/nlcIKh6sBtc?hl=en&hd=1\" type=\"application/x-shockwave-flash\" width=\"448\" height=\"252\"><\/embed><\/object><\/div>";" alt=""></a></div></div></div> <p>They LOVE it…LOL.</p> <p>I'm sure they think it takes all the “fun” out of it.</p> <p>But…</p> <p>I think that the words matter.</p> <p>I think that music should SAY something.</p> <p>Sometimes today…POP MUSIC doesn’t SAY anything.</p> <p>ESPECIALLY for girls.</p> <p>Most of the time it is all about GIVING yourself away, talking bad about someone else, or wanting something you cant have. </p> <p>In the end….making you feel inadequate.</p> <p>BUT…every once in a while I come across a song that I TRULY LOVE.  </p> <p>A song that SEEPS with encouragement, INSPIRATION, and energy. A song that LIFTS you up with words.</p> <p>THAT SONG right now is “ROAR” by Katy Perry.</p> <div id="scid:5737277B-5D6D-4f48-ABFC-DD9C333F4C5D:236513f8-68bb-4d04-84a0-600bac3c8267" class="wlWriterEditableSmartContent" style="float: none; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding-left: 0px; margin: 0px; display: inline; padding-right: 0px"><div id="598bb49d-c090-46d2-9a5e-6adbe65a1dbe" style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px; display: inline;"><div><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CevxZvSJLk8" target="_new"><img src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjCQ-Y5t1A6zwRvUU1ebLakZuCMdZ4olFrwYRvvPpMAIOTH01qW0a8AKmTpxMBT6zWH91qNCbsn5Cf-Nw-aBBnJ1BYUGJbJ0-wiJHqWEl2RUn3HNx2hOTncuknJ7_nhVazYTYyQSikA5LWg//?imgmax=800" style="border-style: none" galleryimg="no" onload="var downlevelDiv = document.getElementById('598bb49d-c090-46d2-9a5e-6adbe65a1dbe'); downlevelDiv.innerHTML = "<div><object width=\"448\" height=\"252\"><param name=\"movie\" value=\"http://www.youtube.com/v/CevxZvSJLk8?hl=en&hd=1\"><\/param><embed src=\"http://www.youtube.com/v/CevxZvSJLk8?hl=en&hd=1\" type=\"application/x-shockwave-flash\" width=\"448\" height=\"252\"><\/embed><\/object><\/div>";" alt=""></a></div></div></div> <p>I know.</p> <p>Katy Perry.</p> <p>She is pretty amazing though….if you can see past the boob cupcakes she has worn before.</p> <p>As we watched the video the other day I talked to Shasha and Sheba about how she is so pretty…but being FUNNY makes her even PRETTIER.</p> <p>We talked about how she has pretty hair, and clothes, and make up…but the prettiest asset she has…</p> <p>is the ability to laugh at herself.</p> <p>THAT is where her TRUE beauty lies.</p> <p>That is where the REAL DIAMONDS are….gleaming thru in her sense of humor.</p> <p>I tried to tell them that when you can laugh at yourself and be funny…..your TRUE  beauty shines thru.</p> <p>And then it hit me once again….</p> <p>You NEVER know.</p> <p>You never know WHO or WHAT or in WHAT form your life lessons will come.</p> <p>Sometimes they come in the form of Katy Perry….in the jungle, roaring at a tiger, brushing an elephants teeth.</p> Janahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17681902597194726962noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1165576307254676741.post-7606390385386745362013-09-16T20:21:00.001-04:002013-09-16T20:26:15.651-04:00Can I get a “Red Room”?<p><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhlNJ-3Zv1dr1FzOST7VgIaHhpeQaiCWHKevzUdujkbySDYFAb1ozBRryc4RdSWSxXomWumhksvP1vov6Davt4fcqDDMCaEwIVJ14TDkQsIt__iEtQy5km9azE_pfQDLcZHxsm9buS2C0gJ/s1600-h/LittleHouse%25255B3%25255D.jpg"><img title="LittleHouse" style="border-top: 0px; border-right: 0px; background-image: none; border-bottom: 0px; padding-top: 0px; padding-left: 0px; margin: 0px 0px 5px; border-left: 0px; display: inline; padding-right: 0px" border="0" alt="LittleHouse" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjx05SuOW3GBP3MpPyaDdss10fLE_3Ryy5IIH4ffF1cw-c7WfPVmXfLv7auhJCmeYQ9532jlsepD0j2WlHSzlBYpjieFmgQk68o5nl_OEwCDyQlFS3vQQSMnDbyWSn1UWy6eOJlN5v3Ymsk//?imgmax=800" width="403" height="410" /></a></p> <p>In the faith of rastafari -there are many different "kinds" of Rastas. <br />Some are more strict than others, some are more lenient, customs can be different in different places, or for different people.... <br />Not very different from the "denominations" of Christianity. <br />In Jamaica, up in the hills, there is a group of Rastas called "BoBos" .. <br />They are VERY natural, VERY much on the outsides of society. <br />VERY SPIRITUAL.... <br />Well one of their customs is that when a woman is on her "cycle", she must retire to a "red room"... <br />She is FORBIDDEN to cook for anyone, come out of the room, or even be around the men, for fear her negative "vibes" would taint anyone around her. <br />I WISH I HAD A RED ROOM!!!!! <br />I told Jason that I need one of these. <br />I need somewhere I can go and noone has to be around me. <br />I dont even want to be around myself at these times. <br />PMS can make me a Mommy that yells and dosent have patience. <br />PMS makes me a wife that dosent want to clean or cook ANYTHING!!!! <br />PMS makes me feel like I have electricity under my skin. <br />I NEED A RED ROOM!!!! <br />The trouble is ...I dont WANT to NEED a red room. <br />I want to be patient, kind and CLEAN, the WHOLE month long!! <br />So say a little prayer for me tonight... <br />Pray that tommorow when I wake up- I will not WANT a red room. <br />Pray that my kids get something besides Pop-tarts tommorow morning for breakfast….</p> <p>and lunch…</p> <p>and dinner………</p> Janahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17681902597194726962noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1165576307254676741.post-57013303532702994842013-08-27T19:40:00.001-04:002013-08-27T19:44:39.324-04:00RAS-springa: Into the world...<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEimOkLP3ioh97bOHI5IwGs8XpZL8PjTgg-uF83i3S9pfBmgLmhnD_qu-8MGj6hZB7x9NoCyKi4w5VzqHa7tl8EJbaNOdDwAjE6FAsW4_PN7N4B55kUZA5XjOKGw0g68FZp2u2uu3-emB9D-/s1600/amish.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEimOkLP3ioh97bOHI5IwGs8XpZL8PjTgg-uF83i3S9pfBmgLmhnD_qu-8MGj6hZB7x9NoCyKi4w5VzqHa7tl8EJbaNOdDwAjE6FAsW4_PN7N4B55kUZA5XjOKGw0g68FZp2u2uu3-emB9D-/s1600/amish.jpg" /></a></div>
<br />
<br />
Last week was ......<br />
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Scary</div>
<div>
Shocking</div>
<div>
Heart pounding</div>
<div>
Mysterious</div>
<div>
Exciting</div>
<div>
And</div>
<div>
Eye opening</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
We did something that I had always expected to happen ...at some point.</div>
<div>
Zeek decided that after 7 years of home school...he wanted to try a small charter school in town.</div>
<div>
He is almost 13 years old and we decided after checking out the school ...that we would honor his request.</div>
<div>
You see...I always figured that one day....they might want to venture out and go to public school.</div>
<div>
I never ever ever want to deny them of something that may be a learning experience for them.</div>
<div>
So when he said that he wanted to try the middle school...I was shocked.</div>
<div>
I never thought it would be Zeek. </div>
<div>
I know him. </div>
<div>
I have been his teacher for 7 years....I know how he learns.</div>
<div>
I know his sweet soul, and heart. I know what he struggles with and what he excels in.<br />
I know that he has a hard time concentrating.<br />
I know that he spends more time reading that he has to on math.<br />
I know when he needs a break and when we need to push on.</div>
<div>
I know.</div>
<div>
But..to no avail...when he said he wanted to try...we let him.</div>
<div>
We called all the family and told them that Zeek was going on this new adventure. <br />
Everyone was very excited and happy for him.</div>
<div>
I was excited and proud that he wanted to TRY something new.</div>
<div>
It struck me how brave he was....</div>
<div>
Taking a "RAS -springa" if you will.</div>
<div>
(Like when the Amish take a RUMSPRINGA )</div>
<div>
So we prepared him and sent him on his way in his rosé colored glasses.</div>
<div>
I picked him up on Thursday afternoon and he was almost unrecognizable.</div>
<div>
He was sad and downtrodden.</div>
<div>
Ummm.....not. Part. Of. The. Deal.</div>
<div>
That is not Zeek.</div>
<div>
He usually SHINES. </div>
<div>
With me: </div>
<div>
He thrives in school. He smiles. He laughs. He concentrates. He studies.</div>
<div>
But this was a zombies out 13 year old who had just spent 6 hours in school...only to come home and do 3-4 hours of homework.</div>
<div>
And this was day 2!</div>
<div>
I saw it coming.</div>
<div>
When you have a child....if you pay attention. </div>
<div>
You. Know. Them.</div>
<div>
You know when something isn't right. </div>
<div>
Something was wrong.</div>
<div>
He was not happy.</div>
<div>
He was not smiling.</div>
<div>
He was not shining.</div>
<div>
He was not my Zeek.</div>
<div>
It<br />
Broke</div>
<div>
My</div>
<div>
Heart.</div>
<div>
He got in the car and set his backpack on the floor like it had the weight of the world in it.<br />
"How was your day babe?"<br />
"Eh." he said with a heaviness in his voice.<br />
"What do you mean. "Eh?" I said.<br />
He just sat there and stared at the rain that was so fittingly pouring on the windshield.<br />
"I don't know Mom. I don't know."<br />
I pryed and pryed.<br />
I asked and begged...<br />
He wasn't talking.<br />
We drove all the way home with me asking and him shutting me down.<br />
It<br />
was<br />
weird.<br />
When we pulled in the driveway he got out and walked right past his Dad.<br />
Jay looked at me with a puzzled look....<br />
"Whats wrong with HIM? Bad day?"<br />
I just shrugged and followed him inside.<br />
He sat and stared at his TV for the next hour while I wondered what happened?<br />
A while later I left to take the girls to dance...giving him instructions to start on his 3 hours of homework(WTF???) after I left.<br />
He nodded and said nothing.<br />
By the time I came back an hour and a half later he was in the schoolroom with Jay CRYING.<br />
He was asking to come back home.<br />
In the end ......<br />
after hours of talking and discussing..<br />
We decided that this was not the best option for us.<br />
We decided that if we honored him when he wanted to GO...we needed to honor him when he decided to come home.<br />
In the end...<br />
that<br />
felt<br />
right.<br />
It feels right to have him HERE.<br />
It feels good to know that he went out there....<br />
and CHOSE to come back.<br />
Never mind the chaotic classrooms...<br />
Never mind the 3 hours of homework...<br />
Never mind the "problem" kids...<br />
Never mind the wrench it threw in the schedule...<br />
NONE of that was the CORE of the issue....<br />
The CORE of the issue for me was this....<br />
<br />
I want them to be prepared for the world, but I don't want them to be "of this world".<br />
I want them to be comfortable with themselves.<br />
Comfortable enough to come to us and say, "This is not right for me."<br />
I want them to know that we listen, we hear, we trust them.<br />
Enough to HEAR them when they speak....no matter if they are 3, 13, or 33.<br />
We will listen.<br />
We will HEAR.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
Janahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17681902597194726962noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1165576307254676741.post-33715724994528701362013-07-19T14:53:00.001-04:002013-07-19T14:53:12.447-04:00Talia’s Teachings……….<p>I look at parenting like I am building a soul.</p> <p>I take what God has entrusted to me and TRY to help them walk their journey.</p> <p>Wherever that takes them.</p> <p>As mine grow we are facing different obstacles now.</p> <p>Life in the first world for a pre teen is a landmine of decisions and choices.</p> <p>I am constantly saying, “I need YOU to make better choices.”</p> <p>Which is funny, because when they are little you don’t think past the diaper changes and the breastfeeding dilemmas. </p> <p>Hard to imagine a life without whipping out your boob every 20 minutes….</p> <p>Its hard to imagine these tiny beings …..bigger.</p> <p>But – it. happens.</p> <p>They grow.</p> <p>They change.</p> <p>They become…right before your eyes.</p> <p>Its actually painful…like when you get tickled till it hurts.</p> <p>It’s a love THAT piercing.</p> <p>And then all the sudden…its 10 years later, your boobs are tightly locked away  and your kids are as tall as you….and have bigger feet.</p> <p>All.</p> <p>of.</p> <p>the.</p> <p>Sudden.</p> <p>And then …Here we are having to explain WHY you cant text someone 30 times in 30 minutes….it just rude.</p> <p>Or</p> <p>WHY you HAVE to wear deodorant EVERY DAY.  Seriously. Every day.</p> <p>or</p> <p>staying up late at night to see what all the girls are “talking about” on Instagram.  So weird being the “appropriate police”.  Teaching them to be nice even when others aren't.</p> <p>or</p> <p>why you should appreciate your friends and family EVERYDAY ….life is short and you never know what tomorrow holds.</p> <p>That is what happened the other day on the way to dance.</p> <p>I had Shasha, Sheba and their friend Honour in the car.</p> <p>They were telling me that Talia Castellano.</p> <p>I knew who she was because for the past few weeks they had been watching her youtube videos and make up tutorials.</p> <p>She was a youtube sensation and all the girls LOVED her.</p> <p>And….she had cancer.</p> <p>The girls were enthralled with her story.</p> <p>and then on the way to dance that morning they told me that she had passed.</p> <p>They were really quiet.</p> <p>For a good 2 or 3 minutes there was silence.</p> <p>Then…I started telling them that she was put on this earth for a purpose.  God put her here to teach us.</p> <p>Thru Talia we could learn that life is too short for dumb arguments with your brother or sister.</p> <p>Thru Talia we could learn that no matter how long your life you can shine and make a difference.</p> <p>Thru Talia we could learn what it looks like to be brave in the eye of a storm.</p> <p>Thru Talia we could learn to really LIVE every day.</p> <p>Thru Talia we learn that you are never to young to TEACH.</p> <p>It was such a beautiful conversation…..they recognized the reality that she was no longer alive….but her light was still shining.</p> <p>I think they recognized that thru bravery , kindness, and joy…..your light can never be dimmed, your memory never forgotten, and I think they recognized the importance of EACH DAY.</p> <p>R.I.P.  Talia… you are still teaching.</p> Janahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17681902597194726962noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1165576307254676741.post-44171384481662926892013-07-01T17:44:00.001-04:002013-07-01T17:44:05.732-04:00Surrendering…to reality.<p><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjC4iiJZSxir5O3NIzaA1U_jjPiU6cWIPmA0pXd_-gYOBJjSNZMHzGpbv-Gq0su-67myujbeMhMt_A1_ZHZqQwXdKVaGp8g96j2CZPcj0q8D_7wjG3Ee0GexWQ47ngsb8yRhIgIlX1MHEGh/s1600-h/surrwnder%25255B4%25255D.jpg"><img style="background-image: none; border-bottom: 0px; border-left: 0px; margin: 0px auto 5px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; display: block; float: none; border-top: 0px; border-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px" title="surrwnder" border="0" alt="surrwnder" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhs4NDkHNAOYBkUz_XNfog8l-31RfMM8eDsQDyKZdnSCctv6P-v6aM6cNBF7u6PBvI1K1ee_LJPJ_-Ug7c7euBUDLTr59SzaR3IObGzLnnxuOQVer3GznSLASASJDQdR7beI6u78YytFZT9//?imgmax=800" width="208" height="244" /></a></p> <p> </p> <p>People ask me one question a lot…</p> <p>They ask…. “How is it that yall have stayed together soooo long?”</p> <p>And it always surprises  me that in this day and time….</p> <p>15 years is an ETERNATY.</p> <p>I mean…it isn’t.  REALLY…in the scope of things.</p> <p> BUT….</p> <p>In the days of broken promises, fairy tale expectations, and unrealistic standards….</p> <p>We have been married “FOREVER”.</p> <p>In todays world girls are taught to never accept less that 1000% of a mans attention.</p> <p>We are taught that unless he remembers birthdays, anniversaries, and the day of your first kiss…..he is an ass.</p> <p>We are fed the lie that he will be perfect.  We are told to accept NOTHING LESS. Wait long enough…and he will appear.</p> <p>I hear women  all the time talking to their friends about how “if he wants you…he will PROVE it by…(Insert ANYTHING). </p> <p>I mean we are taught to be UNFORGIVING and to expect no less than perfection.</p> <p>We are taught to NEVER …ever ever ever…</p> <p>Wave a white flag.</p> <p>We are taught to never SURRENDUR what we WANT…for anyone.</p> <p>WOMEN FIRST…Ugh.  Such a set-up.</p> <p>It is engrained in our minds from a very young age that marriage and life will be EASY…if you find the “right man”.</p> <p>The problem with all THAT is:</p> <p>No one is perfect.</p> <p>No one will live up to those standards.</p> <p>No one will ever be “everything” to you.</p> <p>No one will ever fulfill your every need and want.</p> <p>No one.</p> <p>Ever.</p> <p>The “perfect man” does not exist.</p> <p>He has never walked the earth.</p> <p>I mean even Adam was tempted…and flawed.</p> <p>And that…</p> <p>That is the secret….</p> <p>the realization that we are ALL FLAWED.</p> <p>None of us are perfect.</p> <p>Not.</p> <p>One.</p> <p>of.</p> <p>us.</p> <p>Don’t get me wrong…I am by NO MEANS saying to settle with just ANY MAN.</p> <p>But if you expect perfection…they will ALL fail you.</p> <p>ALL MEN are NOT created equal…in a woman's eyes.</p> <p>What I do mean is…  find and pinpoint the things that REALLY MATTER.  The things worth “fighting for”.  Find the things that are “deal-breakers” and stick to them.  But give some leeway in other areas.  Learn to wave your proverbial white flag.</p> <p>Marriage isn't easy and in my opinion:</p> <p><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjLWVTVpUHzSBh68Q7-HOnGzbM610ZIl04j5j2zm6so3Un-M_ZtqG3n3-3zHdaazz5j0D8BAQBTe0wkmJg1fQiI0lm0dnk5axIQLfD01IGw9c19C3u2dOhmZpPuOaIhpPq-jFKTfqQAUZZr/s1600-h/marriage%25255B2%25255D.jpg"><img style="background-image: none; border-bottom: 0px; border-left: 0px; margin: 0px auto 5px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; display: block; float: none; border-top: 0px; border-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px" title="marriage" border="0" alt="marriage" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi_XyoikPghbzOduHv4S7fhFOHeX8kVDyI2nMXnY4bHCnjvrKOSUvjTdNpFVjmpKhIPGS2ZEemPgbj9-s-RoZvJx8OGIGhbgYKKvUVqD2dxRFzPe5r4xJUeCJaSFIbZteSXxPzX9yH0lbFu//?imgmax=800" width="244" height="244" /></a></p> <p> </p> <p>In order to make a marriage last ….you have to be forgiving.</p> <p>And be forgiven.</p> <p>I look at it like this:</p> <p>There are times in life when  you have to fight FOR your life and times when I had to surrender  TO  IT..</p> <p>The key to a lasting LOVE and marriage is to know the DIFFRENCE…</p> <p>and to always carry a white flag.</p> Janahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17681902597194726962noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1165576307254676741.post-56057300838022948422013-06-20T15:05:00.001-04:002013-06-20T15:06:28.714-04:00Unlocked and Rediscovered.<p> </p> <p><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjf-fbVEz_3PhYw0zW7FAFeMHCudU65yCSeGA6YMODE9cZxmqFnoYfNuAVUVcfmf78kl83Q1alatl7aybefl5k1Kp6twZvsOvutLOGYHJsYVMeoB-IEk_Rk7Geh4e-s_n9OI7dwL9bcPFF_/s1600-h/danceeye%25255B3%25255D.jpg"><img style="background-image: none; border-bottom: 0px; border-left: 0px; margin: 0px 0px 5px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; display: inline; border-top: 0px; border-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px" title="danceeye" border="0" alt="danceeye" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEipyZw4lWAPJV-XSHTWcCaIjEQRD3CLesFScZctJWXX1s4eQV-11I2h6EQboZnyozTWYNwY4lIFQ84ur2X7rZIbIU2sHB7gKfUFndV3QNdLLRRe0cu__LhL7Bdj-yEFHC93I2_kROq0gQCN//?imgmax=800" width="414" height="421" /></a></p> <p> </p> <p>It enveloped me so quickly that I almost held my breath.</p> <p>This feeling.</p> <p>This change.</p> <p>This….LIFE.</p> <p>In that OTHER life, you know…the one I lived BEFORE.</p> <p>Before I became…</p> <p>a mother</p> <p>a nurse</p> <p>a teacher</p> <p>a true wife</p> <p>a cook</p> <p>a referee</p> <p>a taxi driver</p> <p>a front yard farmer</p> <p>a zookeeper</p> <p>and all all around BUSY freakin’ person….</p> <p>In THAT life I had only 1 thing…</p> <p>FREEDOM.</p> <p>I had the freedom to be completely selfish and do what I wanted..</p> <p>and believe me…</p> <p>I </p> <p>wasted</p> <p>NONE</p> <p>or</p> <p>it.</p> <p>It was fun…</p> <p>I drew…things other than rainbows and bows.</p> <p>I listened to music…without someone saying, “Mom…can we put it on MY station?” </p> <p>I went where I wanted…when I wanted.</p> <p>I fed myself…..only.</p> <p>I only worried about ME.</p> <p>And I painted….</p> <p>I painted a lot actually.</p> <p>Because I had TIME…and FREEDOM.</p> <p>Then…. like a shell on the edge of the ocean…</p> <p>THIS LIFE….pulled me in.</p> <p>It pulled me with a force that I couldn’t fight.</p> <p>I knew I was going where I was supposed to be.</p> <p>My resting place.</p> <p>THIS LIFE.</p> <p>I surrendered myself to the waves…..</p> <p>I found God.</p> <p>I found my soul mate.</p> <p>I had 4 kids.</p> <p>I started homeschooling.</p> <p>I just rode the waves of my life knowing that I was ….BETTER.</p> <p>I was a TRUER person….I was NOW…who I was supposed to be.</p> <p>THIS</p> <p>LIFE</p> <p>MADE</p> <p>ME.</p> <p>And I am so thankful for that.</p> <p>Eternally. Thankful.</p> <p>I found myself engulfed in all things NOT ME.</p> <p>I was engulfed in Jays music…</p> <p>or</p> <p>nursing babies and changing diapers</p> <p>or</p> <p>the kids schooling</p> <p>or</p> <p>taking care of the house.</p> <p>I just accepted that I had LOST certain parts of myself.</p> <p>I considered it a trade….a FREAKIN BRILLIANT trade.</p> <p>It was a trade I made because I figured some day…</p> <p>I could reclaim certain parts of myself.</p> <p>The parts that were still there…but just buried under responsibilities, bills, work, school, and well….DAILY LIFE.</p> <p>I figured one day I would pick up a paintbrush again.</p> <p>And I did….over the last 15 years I have defiantly used my CRAFTY side for gift making and crafts.</p> <p>But…It had been 15 years since I had taken a brush to a canvas.</p> <p>And then this year I was trying to think of a “dance teacher” gift for our 3 super awesome Performance Ensemble teachers and I thought….</p> <p>“Maybe I could paint them a picture.  It has been a while but I might be able too.”</p> <p>So I went to the Art store and bought 3 canvases and some watercolors and some brushes.</p> <p>Then I found some inspirational ballerina pictures on the net and started painting.</p> <p>This is what happened….</p> <p><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgfDhDY2ZftYINCXItfxmDrqBFaavq-SsbDIUe8KOpC1A1M-L485vou4wnji4sfm2AXYamNFB4qcOAHR7XMr_y9Hh4ksddCiihqLWis8p-l5StG-4tbRT3qzUhO4-8hK6WDPPRZLAiyUx5-/s1600-h/dance1%25255B3%25255D.jpg"><img style="background-image: none; border-bottom: 0px; border-left: 0px; margin: 0px 0px 5px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; display: inline; border-top: 0px; border-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px" title="dance1" border="0" alt="dance1" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh2P4kfK_i3lrxQZDWjFOMXt_SuE4-8plVcsaTrP3KNFwI6ivycSgf6ZtieiCtVMX58hIbQw-a6M7wl-byzBQG5QR4NK1iUl3OQIfF6ocY2qkKoGjpTXcL5episfwVba7-JzZygyZQYDOzv//?imgmax=800" width="322" height="327" /></a></p> <p><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhG78-4m6JZ0JBvbC2ffJrr6UJOsIADcj37Xq6FwUOjDtv1Q_TRttqpuosdpF4tFqyUQV8QUZQ9ckzo4uGe8QRoqx9bdqyDsI0N_Z8JEuT6AFGlB8Z19qCxUj7A37WZ8SpGIE4-qs4b7sFO/s1600-h/dance%2525202%25255B3%25255D.jpg"><img style="background-image: none; border-bottom: 0px; border-left: 0px; margin: 0px 0px 5px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; display: inline; border-top: 0px; border-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px" title="dance 2" border="0" alt="dance 2" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhC9LA2ma2zOwNe31iolX53B9YKPfyGGopnejqJz5tdID1To-8RZw4neV2ZbiLAovVYalsFc8cuJHcnk29PuOFeY2XNxREa-il3d_X7UDMc1XefbqiyL-FONBgwCTGtGGWgu4CVC7BSpP4-//?imgmax=800" width="317" height="322" /></a></p> <p><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg4IThrzNuQ5HCTJ3eYn6ytDyE_o3DhDluzFgnhBTtZASpITN-V5loBa6GsZCyHl5wmCzJuJY_d8yayZlfF_1hBwVUWe3WzWQbNykYzxinfNRwEzoGok5tmc1O_PxhdQnepy7JMFnuKQZHW/s1600-h/dance3%25255B3%25255D.jpg"><img style="background-image: none; border-bottom: 0px; border-left: 0px; margin: 0px 0px 5px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; display: inline; border-top: 0px; border-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px" title="dance3" border="0" alt="dance3" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgtADRHAM9lVVmtRVP78bqv7vyN_ro_KkoqDtQJshwd8vs8GRQk2PhnDqy_MSqEx45_FdOXvSDv3lgD9aYkWBd5f_qVoSpsZG4gYIW_6c_pwZ0yYzoq6MgDUgtEiQDzZ1C1nXznFW9QlJLR//?imgmax=800" width="320" height="325" /></a></p> <p>I cried.</p> <p>I felt a bit of myself come back.</p> <p>I had unlocked something.</p> <p>I was still in there….</p> <p>just hibernating.</p> <p>Waiting for my moment.</p> <p>This </p> <p>was</p> <p>it.</p> <p>It was liberating.</p> <p>And then the most amazing thing happened after I posted the pics on FB and Instagram…..</p> <p>They started selling.</p> <p>Like hot cakes they are selling faster than I can paint them.</p> <p>I have painted and delivered 5 so far and have been commissioned to paint 18 more.</p> <p>What's even better????</p> <p>This came at the perfect time.</p> <p>ALL PROCEEDS ARE GOING TO FURTHER OUR DAUGHTERS DANCE EDUCATION.</p> <p>Can you say “Best Fundraiser Ever”???? </p> <p>By painting…</p> <p>I discovered part of myself again…</p> <p>AND</p> <p>I am raising money for the BEST CAUSE EVER…</p> <p>THIS LIFE.</p> <p>I always knew the waves of this life would somehow bring me back to my starting place….</p> <p>INSIDE MYSELF.</p> <p><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgOxgRDVJxYU6qK64IVW1ycit_6fbovR6nKW4hX5BJiOF-LslZb7Lff4SZN3gxWN53d8YUwZLfXO77PJnC9a-xuC6EpPzSDrS04rCj7lAQ7i8c0haCaeiOg4nOTkO1RDDkh0NlUynvgLep1/s1600-h/dance4%25255B3%25255D.jpg"><img style="background-image: none; border-bottom: 0px; border-left: 0px; margin: 0px 0px 5px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; display: inline; border-top: 0px; border-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px" title="dance4" border="0" alt="dance4" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjc0DlxHGbXMTRSI93oc74i6kWDvqh6EhTKN6sKUOXAVEBS7_8kTZKiIS2f0Z-8BNONm7K4vr4UeKh2gFiZutBAboI8KbwEKJdZ1JEzepSyd0UWwh6igmHNV4ep_JGkurceSgIa3xTs0xXk//?imgmax=800" width="323" height="328" /></a></p> <p><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjVjQYgECjbCJRCvB0pmXfE1u34LERMLNgCjbnPYjQm6dg7eiBQsSR52p8HqewmbQzRycx44r_JJti2j_8FHq41ZGO1EsrUW9O-OBD1T9rYp8xcxyLrgvlgrmXUTxyqh2H9rQCyz0Hi3zD_/s1600-h/dancemass%25255B3%25255D.jpg"><img style="background-image: none; border-bottom: 0px; border-left: 0px; margin: 0px 0px 5px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; display: inline; border-top: 0px; border-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px" title="dancemass" border="0" alt="dancemass" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiSyBk7b9x4p0SsVplIOgHsEYE37bmFohXN0wqSiV142w1MAH17RUjCDby_qIrg_advTQj2OCx5TrX-chjdSTFXSvOmmfkTygDEB0dmXiTdWNo04och3CCl6WvAWmlBL3ebuy9ZfTJPlEH0//?imgmax=800" width="321" height="326" /></a></p> <p><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiXAT4ioPlhf8nkmM7HVlzboXwbuHzU3zQl4pNr698_M3T4W5Xb57AmpUkpnYvdfy9ZE-fZZZQBg5VrdJXMC6WjMttm4pYIsUM3h0Ony68pLB40va-UsRkwdkOTRJczSEDmp9CoOgiYofsS/s1600-h/dancemass3%25255B3%25255D.jpg"><img style="background-image: none; border-bottom: 0px; border-left: 0px; margin: 0px 0px 5px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; display: inline; border-top: 0px; border-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px" title="dancemass3" border="0" alt="dancemass3" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjpNPvZsVe5AxpMTSu956BvTzikYwU-sNlLTu-PKdo5ONL81x4bTbc23DzrUSawaHBg1ydvqSjtB7ZmrvUBdTlYE9-oD84eyFpB4VB03WVGxbHXQRlgS2bKzW9zLLBpScqkD5iCjzAMFeuh//?imgmax=800" width="321" height="326" /></a></p> <p><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgN7tisv36_BHzK26oMZJ1IXdF76pSY_Kwan-bz5Z-5lrcq-OPGxwia_TFMxuFs_0-0RUg0fp25H3FM-3PgJ-8Qw2SBDsiO7fxrPP5CLiAiYEu0mNnYkB4ZQc3Ig-ca39Q8u5hUlZc2yOYo/s1600-h/dancehair%25255B3%25255D.jpg"><img style="background-image: none; border-bottom: 0px; border-left: 0px; margin: 0px 0px 5px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; display: inline; border-top: 0px; border-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px" title="dancehair" border="0" alt="dancehair" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiw52mhoZ_MDu6udb_MDhlemEWqnz0mezJ_g6AquoS5Uo1CGV7D6zxLl2itQv8A7pljBWArb4dmC2yyHAREryMrwqH1J8Rz8Z0UbqIgkgBuAMTuD24MItdvIs10n2EJ1854eJKAEhsSoQ0v//?imgmax=800" width="321" height="326" /></a></p> <p>If interested contact thru <a href="https://www.facebook.com/#!/Rastafam">Facebook</a>, leave a message here, or email me at <a href="mailto:rastafamx6@yahoo.com">rastafamx6@yahoo.com</a> .</p> Janahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17681902597194726962noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1165576307254676741.post-67295765194585488192013-05-31T10:27:00.001-04:002013-05-31T10:27:50.985-04:00Sandpaper….and life.<p><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhMmxBCjxwAm60Q3osZczi9F7-YfXSAC8F5AvmUD1aIk2UZrEOVw9LxDQWOy6ZfdXBGxJTY4cnljoz77D_agKUUSbX4q5Y7QBDQj2s6A1kQjyYx-DcQeiUvuuTGndhU_Uln6PUeqTYq_mAM/s1600-h/sand2%25255B3%25255D.jpg"><img style="background-image: none; border-bottom: 0px; border-left: 0px; margin: 0px 0px 5px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; display: inline; border-top: 0px; border-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px" title="sand2" border="0" alt="sand2" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhX4CUBAEaRFlMcBHcbxarA4dBYRR2Jm8CgUeIcOzNs0skZJ_CyJu_QLXZ5_T-DoDbfoZ_Q3M3DplgBwiKU7s-wVz8ysnloiWs0NMKmibWmTbFS03DlHU2pr-whXsiGRUskqlU0HcKVPkII//?imgmax=800" width="382" height="359" /></a></p> <p>Maybe I used to live a life that SEEPED with guilt and unhappiness ….</p> <p>Maybe I did things that you would NEVER believe……..</p> <p>Maybe the person I was is a MILLION miles from  the person I AM…..</p> <p>Maybe it feels like I have stolen memories  from a faraway land….</p> <p>Maybe as I have gotten older I have realized that THOSE things make me who I am today….</p> <p>and at the same time….</p> <p>they</p> <p>don’t.</p> <p>I was having a conversation with a friend the other day and we were “discussing” someone we both “know”.  She was talking about all the things that this girl had done to make my friend not like her.</p> <p>It was a string of things.</p> <p>A list.</p> <p>A long list.</p> <p>One of the things she said was something about something she had done at 17.   The girl is 26 or so now.</p> <p>It really struck me in that moment.</p> <p>Jeez…I hope people don’t judge me by the things I did when I was 17.</p> <p>Whoa…..there were a lot of “things” I did I am not proud of.</p> <p>And for the most part…I don’t know why I did them.</p> <p>I didn’t come from a terrible background…I had parents who loved me.  I went to a good school.  I was popular.  I had friends. </p> <p>I </p> <p>had</p> <p>a </p> <p>great</p> <p>life.</p> <p>But for some reason……<em>I was unhappy.  I was aching.</em></p> <p>At the time it never made sense to me.</p> <p>Well….Actually-  I never thought about it.</p> <p>It never crossed my mind at 17 to THINK about why I was doing what I was doing.</p> <p>When I think about it now…</p> <p>it</p> <p>seems</p> <p>so</p> <p>clear.</p> <p>I wanted to rebel….against SOMETHING.</p> <p> It was my rebel soul stirring. preparing me.</p> <p>I wanted to rebel against myself, my parents, my friends, but MOSTLY…my all American life.  You know the one everyone dreams of???  </p> <p>The life where ….</p> <p>I live in not 1 but 2 NICE houses, I had a car, loving, devoted parents, a nice school, family and friends.</p> <p>But still……..</p> <p>I wanted to FEEL rebellious.</p> <p>That neat, tidy life didn’t “fit” me very well.  I wanted it to.  I put up a good front.   I wore a pretty mask.  But…it. didn’t. fit.</p> <p>NOW….</p> <p>I understand now that it was just me struggling thru the corners and tunnels of soul.  Without even knowing it.  I was strengthening myself for THIS LIFE.</p> <p>I was a rebel in training.</p> <p>All that rebelling was preparing me for the biggest act of rebellion of all….</p> <p>Following God and walking IN my faith.</p> <p>Which is a TOTALLY rebellious thing to do these days.</p> <p>That life was like SANDPAPER for my soul.</p> <p>Fine grit sandpaper.  </p> <p>It made me WHO I AM.</p> <p>That struggle defined me.</p> <p>That struggle MADE me.  </p> <p>Because after all that debauchery and fun, after all that “rebelling” ...</p> <p>the true test was when God truly came into my life.</p> <p>The true test would be finding a balance in my life between who I was and who I was becoming.</p> <p>And little did I know….all that rebellion and “living”  was exactly what I needed to get back to the core of  myself.</p> <p>Back to the “I-n-I”.</p> <p>That life made me realize that true rebellion happens on the inside…</p> <p>it happens when….</p> <p> you LIVE your life to the fullest, </p> <p>when you stand in your faith, </p> <p>when you shine your light,</p> <p>and</p> <p>when you help others find theirs.</p> <p>That is the essence or rebellion.</p> <p>Sometimes its fine grit and sometimes it is rough grit.</p> <p>But it is really the GRIT that matters.</p> <p>As I write this today…I am eternally grateful for that life because as hard as it was…..</p> <p>It made me.</p> Janahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17681902597194726962noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1165576307254676741.post-1145083497151772372013-05-15T13:37:00.001-04:002013-05-15T13:37:18.416-04:00Deep.<p><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEikROplaBwnZEMiG_y4L9mUKtIqEZbSGnIfpBdyK5TAWEupIlVYQVzMN2hiuCBk5wJmpng8PuEKn2LB76NKOe5NcfqR3jDTZxfJYAiX9YJ87gzur5XXFqU1r0dFdFHLOySJwlqdyjukMuiK/s1600-h/hourglass%25255B3%25255D.png"><img style="background-image: none; border-bottom: 0px; border-left: 0px; margin: 0px 0px 5px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; display: inline; border-top: 0px; border-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px" title="hourglass" border="0" alt="hourglass" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi67qDLMxryweHUt3Me1oool_vHeDUOQBjdEuM93pmjCpKqhaWft07Mm6dOFDplhKvJtKCGEwqFCyFA7Kib0ylM_X0h6SHKNz_hyb6Paf1Cpev91AL6fVNBZtFUEidBwpge1TF42BsPyYz9//?imgmax=800" width="364" height="484" /></a></p> <p>I ran a bath and told the kids to read for 30 min and I set a timer.</p> <p>I settled in with some parenting book that I brought in with me. </p> <p>I figured I had 30 min to myself…well, 20 if I was lucky.</p> <p>Kids….I sat thinking about how life was strange.</p> <p>How did I get to THIS point in my life?</p> <p>How did I get to a point where I have a bunch of kids that are growing literally in front of me.</p> <p>How? </p> <p>When?</p> <p>WHY?</p> <p>Why does it feel like days slip thru my fingers like sand while I desperately try and grasp them before they slip away?</p> <p>Why does it feel like things are changing so fast that I am having a hard time “keeping up”?</p> <p>Then I heard something…something. different.</p> <p>I turned off the bathwater and listened carefully….</p> <p>Someone was talking.</p> <p>It wasn’t the kids.</p> <p>It was a man…..in the house?</p> <p>My heart started racing…..</p> <p>I quickly jumped out of the bath and wrapped up in a towel.</p> <p>I ran, still wet into the hallway and stuck my head into the living room….</p> <p>all the kids looked up startled.</p> <p>“What’s wrong Mom?  Why did you get out of the bath?” said Shasha.</p> <p>I looked around the room confused.</p> <p>I know I heard a MAN.</p> <p>“I thought I heard someone talking….like a MANS voice.”</p> <p>They all looked at each other and shrugged.</p> <p>Then Zeek said , in a strikingly deep voice that I swear he didn’t have when I went into the BATH, “It was me Mom.  I was the only one talking.”</p> <p>I stood there for a minute in total confusion.</p> <p>That couldn’t have been Zeek…it was a MANS voice.</p> <p>I looked again…..nope, he was the only one there.</p> <p>It was happening….we were changing.  Right. before. my. eyes.</p> <p>I slowly walked back to the bath a little more AWARE of just how quickly the sand is actually falling thru my fingers.</p> <p>and</p> <p>a little bit more desperate to keep days from slipping away.</p> Janahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17681902597194726962noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1165576307254676741.post-15280196989832551652013-04-05T11:05:00.001-04:002013-04-05T11:05:59.292-04:00Concrete Boots….<p><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiTXxEizWCUPHmkjr6X0dWGSFh1CfMmc7nukoWR7QZvSyDsYgVcRf-IUhzCfXARnzj5mUpXomV7T9NyifXUI2JyRAI8Cb5VuuHI3Lc9c2NP12khyphenhyphenKFfgMPaYhBaSiaNByMMXzD42Yxxdtyd/s1600-h/boot%25255B3%25255D.jpg"><img style="background-image: none; border-bottom: 0px; border-left: 0px; margin: 0px 0px 5px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; display: inline; border-top: 0px; border-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px" title="boot" border="0" alt="boot" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi-UCgyX5NYvXnQHhzRd-pYojlLU7qBUF1A3hi20yfMilFpdt2pKpNE7keRNjrKmlZtpmQziJbIKoXQUpmtPfWWkxDnnJYEYQf949c9YkWFaHzDq2WdGfPhlqmliOgMJbiNPkN7S_EPeTV9//?imgmax=800" width="391" height="307" /></a></p> <p>Yuck.</p> <p>Blah.</p> <p>Dreary.</p> <p>Melancholy.</p> <p>Tired.</p> <p>Those are the words I would use to describe my attitude the last few months.I have felt like I have been standing in quicksand. Struggling.  </p> <p>Clawing my way thru life. </p> <p> Seriously…in the TRENCHES of life.</p> <p>NOT winning.</p> <p>I just haven't been able to shake it. </p> <p>I have thought about it and thought about it.</p> <p>What I have come up with is THIS:</p> <p>This has been BY FAR my hardest year of homeschooling.   I think that up until now…I have never had ALL 4 kids “IN SCHOOL” at one time.  Up until now it has been 1, then 2, then 3…now 4!!.!!  And- they were all in elementary school.   Easy Peasy!!  Now….we are ALL  ACTIVELY PARTICIPATING in our school day.  And we aren't “watered down” with the ABC’s or crafts really.  We  are all  REALLY doing all our work DAILY.  </p> <p>So…there's THAT pressure.</p> <p>Add THAT to:</p> <p> kids who have gotten OUT of a routine</p> <p>and</p> <p>have started to talk back and not listen</p> <p>and the there is the ARGUING….</p> <p>HOLY SHIT the arguing. </p> <p>Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!</p> <p>That is some HEAVY shit.  Like carrying weighty heavy bricks …walking uphill.  In concrete boots. </p> <p>Don’t get me wrong…we have good days.</p> <p>But-</p> <p> sometimes when I let the devil seep in…. I doubt myself and I fail.</p> <p>Or</p> <p>at least I feel like I do.</p> <p>And isn’t that the same thing really????</p> <p>Pair that with the last couple of months of having more BAD days than GOOD days finally made me BREAK.</p> <p>I couldn’t take it anymore.</p> <p>I MIGHT have had a mini-meltdown.</p> <p>I MIGHT have had a moment.</p> <p>MAYBE.</p> <p>A moment when I just decided to FIGHT.</p> <p>I decided to take my life back from the CHAOS and STRESS that had been building.</p> <p>I </p> <p>would</p> <p>take</p> <p>it</p> <p>no</p> <p>longer.</p> <p>So I sat them down and explained EXACLTY how this was going to go down….. </p> <p>From now on we would:</p> <p>1. get back on a schedule.  Like a real schedule.  A timed schedule.  SHOCKING…I know!.</p> <p>2. they would start to LISTEN.  Like not “half-ass” listen….like REALLY listen.  The 1st time.  Not the 50th. </p> <p>3.  They would STOP arguing and bickering.  They WOULD be thankful for each other and GRATEFUL for their brothers and sisters.  Because they are a freakin’ gift!!! </p> <p>4.  They would make school easier on me by COOPERATING and DOING their schoolwork.  Whatever schoolwork I tell them to do!!  They would be PATIENT with ME.  Because I have 4 students doing 4 different things ….at all  times.  JEEZ!!!!!.</p> <p>I EMPHASIZED that this WOULD be in their “best interest”.</p> <p>I STRESSED that they SHOULD cooperate.  </p> <p>OR </p> <p>ELSE.</p> <p>It had to be done.  The way it WAS…was going to KILL me. </p> <p>It was time.</p> <p> I just realized that some things needed to change in my life in order for me to get thru these years.</p> <p>I needed to take back control and do what I KNEW needed to be done. </p> <p>Make the changes that needed to be made.</p> <p>Do the hard things that are so simple.</p> <p>Just do what I know in my heart is right for my SOUL.</p> <p>Put one foot in front of the other…</p> <p>even when your boots are made of CONCRETE.</p> <p>Because even concrete boots will crumble….</p> <p>when walked in enough.</p> <p>THANK GOD!!!</p> <p><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhRmeOxR870mhlYlLrJRe8gN4WULjUMzAYgtWsSDpxYF3biP15KBlZ4K3tM-6hCImRHToGEB2fJvK2PTGJR7rXKzVzwwNRtSItHddFF7pblplRbns05Mv4NiSOxcTjLLFxW-naw-OwygZDI/s1600-h/stop%25255B3%25255D.jpg"><img style="background-image: none; border-bottom: 0px; border-left: 0px; margin: 0px 0px 5px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; display: inline; border-top: 0px; border-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px" title="stop" border="0" alt="stop" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgoWZlANwqs8Q5Pve-72xcj_wr2fIy5uMycxBXK5j_VN7Gso652ru6OnPXMSGzmmKPKl2F04Z1FGHiC7PWAmx0nRBaOsCzXDhyphenhyphenwPR-hRogb7onFvF22s46GV-GrHVBZuQXYjtkAxQW3LeIh//?imgmax=800" width="404" height="411" /></a></p> Janahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17681902597194726962noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1165576307254676741.post-59571513333948751082013-03-30T23:32:00.001-04:002013-03-30T23:32:11.699-04:00The right track….<p> </p> <p><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhra-LjHN5p1oVCvpu1udzGHtZC5yy1WMDRzerlyeICLptNGuNyzl-L4RSZ9Llk1K8OSD_DfYadU2HzMec92yoKGcxXMOgv0YSDQ4GvfoiLUB0CK-tFvkhKSlKJ72hgbpjpY5VFBsf4rCOz/s1600-h/baby%25255B3%25255D.jpg"><img style="background-image: none; border-bottom: 0px; border-left: 0px; margin: 0px 0px 5px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; display: inline; border-top: 0px; border-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px" title="baby" border="0" alt="baby" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhptwOXTDLFYpofoEh2ai2fHnMCu84YH45XQVSPC4uQUkJVDs0n7aYD3kVrhLp-R0YoCSBT9BMLpfMtmqOn7PcXXRD-d9doUoN-2YXUDwhBHcTieDQo3YY59YNhTOG3e4fkfBn-jKT7xuqr//?imgmax=800" width="399" height="406" /></a></p> <p>I’m a worrier….</p> <p>I know it contradicts with my “chilled out” lifestyle.  (Or what SOME PERCIEVE as my “chilled out lifestyle”)</p> <p>What can I say???   Old habits die hard.</p> <p>I can’t help it…</p> <p>I worry.</p> <p>I fret.</p> <p>I fear.</p> <p>When I was younger….I had NO FEAR.</p> <p>I did things that MOST people wouldn’t dream of.</p> <p>Some good things…mostly- not so good things.</p> <p>All because of a lack of FEAR in my life.</p> <p>A lack AWARENESS that …in life – FEAR can keep you in check.</p> <p>FEAR of consequences.</p> <p>FEAR of what happens when you have NO FEAR.</p> <p>It’s healthy….As long as you USE it to motivate you. (that’s what I tell myself, anyway.)</p> <p>In my life …FEAR sneaks in when I waste too much time thinking  about-</p> <p>raising my kids</p> <p>who they will BE</p> <p>teaching them</p> <p>training them</p> <p>educating them</p> <p>I fear it all.</p> <p>But mostly…</p> <p>I </p> <p>fear</p> <p>if</p> <p>what</p> <p>I </p> <p>am</p> <p>doing</p> <p>is</p> <p>ENOUGH????</p> <p>Are the lessons that I am teaching them going to prepare them for LIFE?</p> <p>Am I doing a good enough job teaching them about what is REAL and IMPORTANT in life???</p> <p>Is the example we, as parents, are setting GOOD ENOUGH?</p> <p>Then….</p> <p>there are times when I am GRANTED a small blessing.</p> <p>A gift of insight…</p> <p>Like tonight….I was babysitting a friends baby(11 months).  She had never stayed with us before, so she was a bit “timid” at first.  She went from kid to kid and back to me again.  She was tired, but would. not. let. go.</p> <p>All the kids took a swing at sitting with her and walking her around.</p> <p>Bless their hearts…they all tried.</p> <p>She.</p> <p>wasn’t.</p> <p>having.</p> <p>it.</p> <p>She was going to FUSS about it.</p> <p>I mean…that is what they do.</p> <p>But…I’ve done this a time or 10,637.  I knew that she would eventually wear herself out and go to sleep.  The fussing doesn’t bother me.</p> <p>It did bother ZEEK.  He came out of his room, where he was watching “The Mummy”.  Do you KNOW how hard it is to get a 12 year old boy to pull himself away from an action movie????</p> <p>The fact that he came out of his ROOM because she was crying said enough.</p> <p>That baby was pulling on his heart strings.</p> <p>And let’s face it ….he is NO STRANGER to babies.</p> <p>His Dad is the “baby whisperer”.</p> <p>No really.</p> <p>Anyway….</p> <p>Then he did something amazing.</p> <p>He said, “Give her to me Mom.  I’ll walk her around.  I think she is just fighting sleep.”</p> <p>I smiled and my heart melted.</p> <p>Then for about 45 min….</p> <p>He walked her around.</p> <p>He bounced her.</p> <p>He fed her a bottle.</p> <p>He rocked her.</p> <p>He was patient and kind and he put her to sleep.</p> <p>And as I was watching this I was blessed with a thought..</p> <p>It occurred to me that I didn’t need to FEAR so much in my life now. </p> <p> I don’t need to WONDER…</p> <p>are we doing enough?</p> <p>how will they “turn out”?</p> <p>I had proof standing in front of me that I was doing SOMETHING right.</p> <p>I have a 12 year old son that is -</p> <p>patient enough..</p> <p>compassionate enough..</p> <p>unselfish enough..</p> <p>and </p> <p>LOVES enough…</p> <p>to put a baby he barely knows to sleep, without being asked.</p> <p>I’d say were on the right track………..</p> Janahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17681902597194726962noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1165576307254676741.post-90924826616712078722013-03-27T09:59:00.001-04:002013-03-27T09:59:02.341-04:00Many hands make light work…Maybe.<p> <a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg5_yisrO7d8tZzLKWoE3EZS2NA2wGNCNaeleKTIcOYwMSJGC27T7K5mLaUzVyBwUIaF0U8silJOP_8PiZIiqT1n78_KPh6-X-YDoi44ZOuVoH9P9HLTtJT4auDniV8VJGI8DHNgKAi0ioN/s1600-h/hands%25255B5%25255D.jpg"><img style="background-image: none; border-bottom: 0px; border-left: 0px; margin: 0px 0px 5px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; display: inline; border-top: 0px; border-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px" title="hands" border="0" alt="hands" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh5JOHOG45ALZaGu71fP65F8WrglC6ZFc4jVZDLjl8fM0cR95jvaRSRIKPSCKz08RI85c7F0RPToPpg5zGAQUZRVDNoiUWNRTF0WQgUT9-PihcX9UovFPhwG53R6cEQ6r-viNXhzQIRgTBC//?imgmax=800" width="398" height="306" /></a></p> <p>For the last few years I have been Jay’s sounding board.</p> <p>You see…He likes to TALK.  </p> <p>Don’t get too excited.  He is far from a roses and “sweet nothings” kind of guy.</p> <p>DOING is his love language….not flowers or cards.</p> <p>When I say, “he likes to talk", I mean LITERALLY.</p> <p>Specifically he likes to talk about PLANS and DREAMS for the house and the property.</p> <p>He likes to walk around the yard and discuss…in detail, what he wants to do HERE…or THERE.</p> <p>Don’t get me wrong….I LOVE to listen.</p> <p>No- really…I do.</p> <p>But this man of mine….he dreams BIG.</p> <p>His ideas unfold into LONG WALKS…sometimes its basically just LAPS around the acre we have.  </p> <p>And I can appreciate that.  I LOVE that about him.</p> <p>It’s just HARD for me.  I guess I think more on the “step-by-step, moment-by moment” level.  It’s really hard for me to SEE it.  Maybe because essentially I am flawed in some ways.  It always seems like '”a lot” to me to “see”.  </p> <p>It seems HEAVY.  Just the” idea” of the plans makes me tired.</p> <p>Maybe it is…</p> <p>the dishes in the sink.</p> <p>the laundry pile on the floor.</p> <p>the dust in the living room.</p> <p>the front porch that needs to be swept.</p> <p>the spelling words that need to be planed.</p> <p>the seeds that need to get in the dirt.</p> <p>the schoolroom that needs to be cleaned.</p> <p>the rabbit cage that needs to be fixed.</p> <p>Maybe it’s the EDUCATING OF 4 KIDS????</p> <p>I don’t know…</p> <p>It has always just been  an inner struggle for me to walk around the yard and plan the BIG things.</p> <p>There is always a PULL to get back to the “daily” stuff that needs to be done.  It just makes me feel overwhelmed.</p> <p>So…I have always TRIED to walk with him…to listen to him.</p> <p>I want him to feel HEARD.  Because in the end….</p> <p>He makes shit HAPPEN. </p> <p>He gets it done.</p> <p>every.time.</p> <p>But…</p> <p>it</p> <p>is</p> <p>exhausting</p> <p>for </p> <p>me</p> <p>mentally.</p> <p>I guess I just compartmentalize it as …”not my department”.</p> <p>I know….so “independent” of me. But…that is easier for me. Lighter.</p> <p>So The other day….I noticed something that was like MUSIC to my tired ears. </p> <p>I heard Jay and ZEEK walking around the house….talking about their PLANS and DREAMS for the bathroom they had just GUTTED. </p> <p>The sinks would be here.</p> <p>The “new to us” garden tub would be here.</p> <p>The toilet was moving to over here.</p> <p>And pretty sure I heard something about making the toilet closet look like a old wooden outhouse. (Swoon!!!!)</p> <p>Um…Yes, please!!!!</p> <p>It was so LIBERATING.</p> <p>It felt so AWESOME that Zeek had taken some of my weight.</p> <p>He had made my walk lighter….without even knowing it.</p> <p>AMAZING!!!</p> <p>Maybe this whole “growing up” thing has a silver lining to it…</p> <p>Maybe.</p> <p>Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.</p> Janahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17681902597194726962noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1165576307254676741.post-55293636546502717682013-03-19T19:10:00.001-04:002013-03-19T19:10:59.811-04:00Just….Next to him.<p><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjo9F3n_ieDqdjLklxFysliHxqUVSGu3bt9MkewnQDy33CEX_Za8Uh9t3iEGsis0YpDm1YKAfJIT-b0-cQOtctdEbvYMTt4t5Nf6IcPMcL_vwlHh6abj5sIah42pFikmodLDhdyx0Eh8Ij9/s1600-h/fort%252520338%25255B4%25255D.jpg"><img style="background-image: none; border-bottom: 0px; border-left: 0px; margin: 0px 0px 5px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; display: inline; border-top: 0px; border-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px" title="fort 338" border="0" alt="fort 338" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjhorwSgkn9CGbiFqQrw9EqTBeIZ2K10rdZ3m3Gt75sBU7kJp-BSgKuyA803xqfvazVBaVLBHFLrw_HXwS78QXwuXKDThYi8NLfcD-_tvP9WIVZIP-oniFbJcoFPBdk2hTenf2oVEyZW_dE//?imgmax=800" width="364" height="484" /></a></p> <p>We are an affectionate family.</p> <p>Scratch that….</p> <p>We are an EXTREMELY affectionate family.</p> <p>We never let them “cry it out”….</p> <p>We aren’t especially strict…</p> <p>We always let them sleep in our beds…even today..</p> <p>We give away TONS AND TONS of hugs and kisses.</p> <p>And I guess as a Mom…I see us as a family that will always kiss and hug…A LOT.  Which is a no brainer when you have little kids….they crave affection and almost HANG on you.</p> <p>But…</p> <p>sometimes things change as they get older.</p> <p>(Damn you, Time!!!)</p> <p>About 6 months ago when I would go to kiss Zeek on the lips, he would turn his cheek.</p> <p>Shudder…I know.</p> <p>After a few times of this happening, I. had. to.say.something.</p> <p>I HAD to explain that THIS… was not going down like THAT.</p> <p>I had to explain that even GROWN ASS MEN kiss their Mama’s.</p> <p>I am pretty sure I said something about birthing him, and labor, and that I had earned kisses for ETERNITY.</p> <p>Yadda Yadda.  LOL.</p> <p>I even called Jay in to set. him. straight.</p> <p>After that…he was cool.</p> <p>He is always super sweet and loving….</p> <p>but as a “pre-teen”…I am learning that the best thing I can do is:</p> <p>BE</p> <p>AVAILABLE</p> <p>and</p> <p>DON’T </p> <p>ASK.</p> <p>Stand next to him, sit close to him, walk with him, LISTEN to him.</p> <p>Just BE THERE.</p> <p>It is in THESE times that he opens up fully.</p> <p>And SOMETIMES,when I am REALLY lucky….when  I walk with him, he gently laces his fingers in mine.</p> <p>I don’t say a word…..I just smile and keep walking.</p> <p>Cherishing every single minute.</p> Janahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17681902597194726962noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1165576307254676741.post-45233912730953029322013-03-06T14:42:00.001-05:002013-03-06T14:42:39.156-05:00In life’s “weeds”……<p><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEifLmRW5gnqsGZQTTEyP_dqxBbP456FP9N0iatkofT1atgg-60hZ8cuKaP20-tEGg0HrbWKk5puoD-eYCHVOknoS-Pq05m8c2gdRyMeHji-hmRJCFD8bbu7_veA2oG85KfXjTlnDlUnRX3y/s1600-h/grass%25255B3%25255D.jpg"><img style="background-image: none; border-bottom: 0px; border-left: 0px; margin: 0px 0px 5px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; display: inline; border-top: 0px; border-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px" title="" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjQa0e6QGu-St3eqa9talbeaXEmzudANBBhyLtzgW32D2PzHgXWNb9YRaDAORD9k7c0er_jEkXOocmAavc3jiXzkHvqxV433CqlaLuJgzNUGcrnhRlw80gz84D-ZlhkrKEk-DICAoX-eof6//?imgmax=800" width="408" height="314" /></a></p> <p>The “weeds”….</p> <p>that’s what we call it when we get REALLY busy waiting on tables. </p> <p>You know….running your ass off trying to…</p> <p> please everyone at once </p> <p>AND</p> <p>get everything done</p> <p>AND </p> <p>not forget ONE THING.</p> <p>Yeah…</p> <p>That. is. my. life. right. now.</p> <p>I've said it before …..life was MUCH easier when all I had to do to make someone happy was…</p> <p>put a boob in their mouth.</p> <p>But…</p> <p>Gone are those days.</p> <p>Now we are in the “weeds” with emerging hormones, school, dance(x6 days a week) ju-jit-zu(x2 days a week), PRE-MS,  changing voices,slight  behavior issues, feeding 4 GROWING kids,  sibling rivalry, adjusting to a new schedule and those are just THEIR issues.</p> <p>Don’t get me started on MY ISSUES:</p> <p>still broken</p> <p>still learning</p> <p>still praying</p> <p>still surviving</p> <p>thru PARENTHOOD.</p> <p>Life is a crazy journey.</p> <p>Sometimes I have time to write about it</p> <p>and</p> <p>sometimes I don’t.</p> <p>Bare with me…..</p> <p>I’m just doing some “landscaping".</p> Janahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17681902597194726962noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1165576307254676741.post-82543982459794715082013-01-17T12:53:00.001-05:002013-01-17T12:53:46.341-05:0015 blocks of jealousy….<p><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiRKagSdVgMC52uWnIhEbGRR28SN7Qgt8P1N2Yotdft0IOtM187uVAI8ZvxcKPMfNEf2GwFkD2-zNrxOBECb7hs5VGtgiio0JrWd1IfcaRD5Hh-NBV3TDWN0fuj4QM15Nu6kxOLR4B4rf5o/s1600-h/bus%25255B5%25255D.jpg"><img style="background-image: none; border-bottom: 0px; border-left: 0px; margin: 0px auto 5px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; display: block; float: none; border-top: 0px; border-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px" title="bus" border="0" alt="bus" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhjcSkNr_VUTrc2n5OcWIUEfUUtdyyEN-jTgDy86sxVz7SssdvHCv2O6vwk0KbspzDKOK_BcMQxZ9S5YUKhAP94hYPhFcayHkvqQVpVP41EfoB3fbGjfJs-_Qs7bOuzxubvACPk8h75vRv5//?imgmax=800" width="307" height="237" /></a></p> <p> </p> <p>About every 3 blocks the school bus would stop and I would see  sleepy eyed parents waving goodbye to the kids with a half-smile.</p> <p>We were DIRECTLY behind the bus on A1A….</p> <p>all</p> <p>the</p> <p>way</p> <p>down</p> <p>the</p> <p>beach.</p> <p>We had to stop at each and every stop on the way to take Jay to work.</p> <p>What seemed like an eternity was probably more like 15 blocks.</p> <p>With every stop I was becoming more and more GREEN.</p> <p>15 torturous blocks of watching parents send kids to school…only to go home and do GOD-knows what.</p> <p>Whatever they wanted….5-6 hours to themselves.</p> <p>Ugh.</p> <p>I imagine they lay in the sun reading 50 shades of Grey </p> <p>or</p> <p>they have dinner with their beasties…EVERY. DAY.</p> <p>or</p> <p>they relax, get all the laundry done and watch “Days of Our Lives”, which coincidentally…is like NONE of the days of their lives.</p> <p>I am not going to lie….</p> <p>I </p> <p>was </p> <p>JEALOUS,</p> <p>Jelly,</p> <p>Green faced,</p> <p>Envious.  </p> <p>All at one time.</p> <p>The day before was REALLY hard for me in school.  </p> <p>Sometimes it runs smoothly, and sometimes it all turns to shit.</p> <p>Being COMPLETELY responsible for the outcome of my 4 kids education is a DAUNTING TASK.  </p> <p>Like…”make me doubt myself, and bring me to my knees” daunting.</p> <p>It is a huge responsibility that I don’t take lightly.</p> <p>There are times that I read all the blogs on the internet and forget that they are all not 1 PERSON.  They are all different people doing small tasks everyday.  But it is easy to forget that and feel like a failure when you don’t complete a “pin” everyday.</p> <p>It is easy to get down on yourself and think….</p> <p>CAN</p> <p>I</p> <p>DO</p> <p>THIS????</p> <p>I mean…can I REALLY educate these kids?</p> <p>REALLY?</p> <p>You see…the devil seeps in as doubt.</p> <p>He can come in thru a crack and permeate a space.</p> <p>Quickly.</p> <p>He is always conspiring  to steal our joy and rob us of what we KNOW to be TRUE.</p> <p>He is slick like that.</p> <p>But he is no match for the Almighty.</p> <p>God KNOWS truth and intent.</p> <p>He knows that because my intentions are good….I WILL SUCCEED.</p> <p>He knows that my drive will conquer my jealousy.</p> <p>He knows that in my heart….I am doing exactly what I should be doing for my family.</p> <p>He knows because ….</p> <p>He put all those traits in me.</p> <p>He grew my strength and made me - just. for. this. life.</p> <p>Perfectly woven and ripened….</p> <p>to be doing exactly what I am doing right now.</p> <p>Even after 15 blocks of jealousy.</p> Janahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17681902597194726962noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1165576307254676741.post-71951496049152009442013-01-08T21:11:00.001-05:002013-01-08T21:11:00.968-05:00Half my heart……….<p><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgT9KCRIj4vgw4Cd4MleQPLS_3a-8GwheNgLS_M_hmdxXk-N_ZxlZ1Hj2LU-H5odK3v2o6mxWIR-YsrJKKpbjCh4YYQR_-3MHvEOou1EIRpYtanHUKfNkNkL4wHOU5KWLRchwp1nLljfVsi/s1600-h/texas%252520love%25255B3%25255D.jpg"><img style="background-image: none; border-bottom: 0px; border-left: 0px; margin: 0px 0px 5px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; display: inline; border-top: 0px; border-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px" title="texas love" border="0" alt="texas love" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgIk5e3phC5nTrx6UAIp3xdv6vQ7t-ZD3vHAXs7-UOV6L9DXrTp_mEGIIk5J86puWqErOYT2T8WmOfpWZ6m9h4Enk_KsNWB6CHo6hqj5Yat4X-UI_e55mQacaa4IqH72d73-biMaExrJwzC//?imgmax=800" width="417" height="424" /></a></p> <p>We have been having a debate in our house.</p> <p>A TEXAS SIZED dilemma…</p> <p>You see…</p> <p>I am a Texan.</p> <p>I was born and raised a Texan.</p> <p>1/2 my heart lives in Texas…still today.</p> <p>I came to Florida when I was 19.</p> <p>So young….I really just wanted to go to the beach.</p> <p>And I LOVE IT…</p> <p>I live in an amazing town and live a JOY filled life.</p> <p>But…</p> <p>I am a TEXAN.</p> <p>Make no mistake about it.</p> <p>And if there is one thing Texans are…it is proud.</p> <p>As I have grown up…this has GROWN in me.</p> <p>Now..at 35-</p> <p>I love everything “Texas”…</p> <p>the 1000 degree summers</p> <p>the bluebonnets</p> <p>the dear leases</p> <p>the line dances</p> <p>the country cookin’</p> <p>the wide open spaces</p> <p>the Whataburger</p> <p>the cows</p> <p>the 2 steppin’</p> <p>the big cities</p> <p>the small towns</p> <p>the rodeos</p> <p>the cowboys</p> <p>the chemical plants</p> <p>the ship channel</p> <p>but mostly…</p> <p>I love the HEARTBEAT of Texas.</p> <p>The family and friends that GREW me.</p> <p>It is what brings me back over and over.</p> <p>I </p> <p>Love</p> <p>Texas.</p> <p>So you can imagine how proud I was when I heard about THIS conversation when Jay was explaining the kids heritage to them:</p> <p>Jay:  You guys know my family is Italian.  My family came to the United States from Italy.  So you are 1/2 Italian.</p> <p>Shasha:  So we’re 1/2 Italian and 1/2 Texan!!!!</p> <p>Yes, child….you are.</p> <p>LOL.</p> <p>Jay tries to argue.</p> <p>He says something about “Texas not being a country”.</p> <p>He just doesn’t “get it”.</p> <p>I guess my TEXAS LOVE is rubbing off!!!</p> <p>Now …..to teach them that “Deep in the Heart of Texas” is our National Anthem.</p> <p>Hahahah</p> Janahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17681902597194726962noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1165576307254676741.post-17371701647091500122013-01-02T23:28:00.001-05:002013-01-02T23:28:38.159-05:00Back in the saddle…..<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj4nIq47gEbjyW2ZvR3TzVSi9ZItQi4_AmL2B8a82EeEOiktpvas26VJDAolh6jaMUYBpbkifUo48eO0h6aZ8ahfoApmlEXT3M2FPjWvukNS2dgIcd05fyPH5pgCn4ab-VbjJmc7PulUsG2/s1600-h/Back_in_the_saddle_1944_1_%25255B3%25255D.jpg"><img style="background-image: none; border-bottom: 0px; border-left: 0px; margin: 0px 0px 5px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; display: inline; border-top: 0px; border-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px" title="Back_in_the_saddle_1944_1_" border="0" alt="Back_in_the_saddle_1944_1_" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgUxeXf37MT3iL8WAelvs66GfE9oiePqcknqyhsL6S89_FYIOWekgN9HTiynPgaZ2WCpRSW1SV6dT_JjW5ys855-8TDbOMjRNhvWxJPA_0h_zzwiyUxYa7d6wKOyC68eGYwKeqKN9BygCbr//?imgmax=800" width="389" height="395" /></a> <p>I’m BACK….</p> <p>We’ll….I’m trying to be. </p> <p>I spent the last month or so really IN my life.</p> <p>Sometimes I get really lost in all the “extras”.</p> <p>Facebook</p> <p>My blog</p> <p>My cell phone</p> <p>You know…all the things that tend to pull us slowly away from  REAL LIFE.</p> <p>The things that creep in and steal your time…those are the things that keep us from really being EMMERSED in our lives.</p> <p>Those are the things that keep me 1/2 in moments that I should be ALL in for.</p> <p>It was a nice break…and it really gave me a chance to reevaluate what I wanted to accomplish thru those outlets.</p> <p>This is what I came up with:</p> <p>I love my Facebook…all my friends are in there.  It is where I keep in touch with old friends and even make some new friends.</p> <p>And</p> <p>I love my blog.</p> <p>I really do.</p> <p>But…..</p> <p>I have never felt more pressured by a non-existent deadline in my life.</p> <p>There is no one telling me what to write</p> <p>or</p> <p>when to write.</p> <p>But sometimes…I just don’t feel like it.</p> <p>I just don’t feel like “thinking deeply” about anything.I really feel like my DAILY life takes every bit of  “creativity” I have. </p> <p>I mean….I have 2 pre-teens </p> <p>and</p> <p>an overly emotional 9 year old </p> <p>and </p> <p>a 7yr old is going on 15.</p> <p>My day can be pretty long and exhausting.  It seems to be a never-ending stream of  long talks and breaking up arguments.</p> <p>Kind of like a carnival ride…</p> <p>that</p> <p>never</p> <p>stops.</p> <p>But I also know that one day….I will be so proud of the fact that I have kept this amazing journal of our lives.   It is something that really means a lot to me.  Something I have been working on for a VERY LONG TIME. </p> <p>So…..In the end I decided that :</p> <p>1.  It was a nice break from the norm to NOT write and feel pressured by an imaginary boss waiting on his “next story”.</p> <p>2. I am BACK!!!  I am going to make an effort starting today to keep up with this daily journal and blog. </p> Janahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17681902597194726962noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1165576307254676741.post-71826254438814983112012-12-30T16:34:00.001-05:002012-12-30T16:34:06.256-05:00Nearing a “new year”…….<p>The paradox of our time in history is that we have taller buildings, but shorter tempers; wider freeways, but narrower viewpoints; we spend more, but have less; we buy more, but enjoy it less. <br />We have bigger houses and smaller families; more conveniences, but less time; we have more degrees, but less sense; more knowledge, but less judgment; more experts, but more problems; more medicine, but less wellness. <br />We drink too much, smoke too much, spend too recklessly, laugh too little, drive too fast, get too angry too quickly, stay up too late, get up too tired, read too seldom, watch TV too much, and pray too seldom. <br />We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values. We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often. We've learned how to make a living, but not a life; We've added years to life, not life to years. <br />We've been all the way to the moon and back, but have trouble crossing the street to meet the new neighbor. We've conquered outer space, but not inner space; We've done larger things, but not better things; We've cleaned up the air, but polluted the soul; we've split the atom, but not our prejudice; we write more, but learn less; we plan more, but accomplish less. We've learned to rush, but not to wait; We have higher incomes, but lower morals; We have more food, but less appeasement; We build more computers to hold more information to produce more copies than ever, but have less communication; We've become long on quantity, but short on quality. <br />These are the times of fast foods and slow digestion; tall men, and short character; steep profits, and shallow relationships. These are the times of world peace, but domestic warfare; more leisure, but less fun; more kinds of food, but less nutrition. <br />These are days of two incomes, but more divorce; of fancier houses, but broken homes. These are days of quick trips, disposable diapers, throw away morality, one-night stands, overweight bodies, and pills that do everything from cheer to quiet, to kill. <br />It is a time when there is much in the show window and nothing in the stockroom; a time when technology can bring this letter to you, and a time when you can choose either to make a difference, or just turn the page... <br />~Author Unknown~ </p> Janahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17681902597194726962noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1165576307254676741.post-90364451929396517922012-12-03T09:20:00.001-05:002012-12-03T09:20:37.080-05:00Walking the Talk….<p>Grow.</p> <p>Change.</p> <p>Evolve.</p> <p>That has been our “theme” lately.</p> <p>When the kids were little they seemed to GROW before my eyes.  I never really SAW it happening….it just did. Miraculously. </p> <p>Right</p> <p>in</p> <p>front</p> <p>of </p> <p>me.</p> <p>Amazing.  Wonderful. Godly stuff.</p> <p>But it was more like, “Wow…Zeeks pants are WAY too short.  He GREW a lot!!!”</p> <p>But …you don’t NOTICE really the growth everyday.</p> <p>Because it happens so slowly.</p> <p>Like a granted wish….it just happens and THEN you SEE it.</p> <p>I guess growing in any way is like that…..when you are in the middle of it- you don’t notice.</p> <p>But- when you take a moment to really look….it is soooo evident.</p> <p>Soooo “right in front of you”….</p> <p>it is undeniable.</p> <p>Sometimes we don’t even KNOW we are growing …till we have GROWN.</p> <p>LOL.</p> <p>A couple of weeks ago, Jay was a part of the “2012 St. Augustine Pirate Gathering” parade.</p> <p>ONE of his “jobs” he has is being a pirate on <a href="http://www.blackravenadventures.com/">The Black Raven Pirate Ship</a>.  If a “job” consists of sword fighting, firing black powder cannons,  face painting, and telling some-what dirty jokes. LOL.</p> <p>I am beyond GRATEFUL for this amazing  job for him.  It really let’s his personality SHINE.  So…it was a no-brainer when he said that the ship was going to be in the pirate parade.  </p> <p>Then…..</p> <p>he said they wanted the boys to be in the parade.</p> <p>Crickets.</p> <p>That is what we heard when he asked the boys.</p> <p>I think Zeek said, “ Like…actually walk IN the parade? Not just GO?”</p> <p>Hahahahaha.</p> <p>Yes son….like “walk IN the parade” and wear a pirate costume.</p> <p>GASP.</p> <p>I thought Zeek was going to DIE.  Like just drop right there.</p> <p>He was not excited…his 9 year old brother was.</p> <p>Awesome.  </p> <p>As we sat around the dinner table,  I did everything I could to CONVINCE my 12 year old son that it would be “cool” to walk down the MIDDLE of the town wearing a prate costume and throwing candy.</p> <p>“No really….it will be fun!”</p> <p>“You friend Doug is doing it.”</p> <p>“Your Dad does a lot for YOU…”</p> <p>“It is good to get out of your comfort zone.”</p> <p>“Your DAD is doing it, and he is UBBER COOL.”</p> <p>“There will be LOTS of pirates in town….no one will even blink an eye”</p> <p>“Don’t worry….we will MAKE you a great costume!” (You can imagine his face on THAT one!) </p> <p>Lets just say…</p> <p>He </p> <p>was </p> <p>not</p> <p>convinced.</p> <p>And because I always want them to THINK that they are in SOMEWHAT control of decisions they make in their lives…</p> <p>I said, “Ok…think about it.  But…you  should really do it.  It will be fun.  You have a few days to make the RIGHT decision. Which should be YES.”</p> <p>He half-heartedly said OK….</p> <p>A couple of days later I asked about his decision, he said “ I’m not really sure yet…I don’t know.”</p> <p>My response, “Ok…I'm giving you a day to come to the decision to DO IT.  Because you ARE doing it.  But, Ill give you a day to “get there” on your own.”</p> <p>He looked at me and said, “Alright….I’ll probably do it.”</p> <p>Hahahaha.  Smart boy. LOL.</p> <p>The day of the parade came and I talked to him about “getting out of your comfort zone and being “in” your life.”  </p> <p>We talked about how in life you will come across situations where you will be uncomfortable.  You will be put in situation where you really would just rather WATCH from the sidelines.</p> <p>But….</p> <p>That is God pressing you.</p> <p>That is him “pushing you” to be better, more ALIVE.</p> <p>That is him inviting you to be more present and involved in your life.</p> <p><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhtKlAnUrOFPX3YcLRwLZKf9xLtWn0a2Wp6dtI7vMirmOV85xZJmD6dEnDGpRfsY04I4HWhcSOPLM4hYGOialpSE9qafQ6qcTtbNO8PfzmINupEDUyHmAFVTFf2YuCs4Cg-YS_Kma6hiBra/s1600-h/pirate%252520015%25255B4%25255D.jpg"><img style="background-image: none; border-bottom: 0px; border-left: 0px; margin: 0px 0px 5px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; display: inline; border-top: 0px; border-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px" title="pirate 015" border="0" alt="pirate 015" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhk4GGHT5g83JFNx5DKcfQ1Bc4gFR_TDpPBUUW7iTaGEDT8TKi0EE6ITFN7zIC9XbVldqqBbVvI7P_8zsu_PxYQCOE8u_ykgzcvpF7wKVjhsiTza8pd8JQGl7Ex8rcWIdc0PjdvYdkGr6hO//?imgmax=800" width="410" height="315" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEie_u9_yaX9Zs168deRyAbL0Llp7sTnVTFWEb8Tax-zkzgG-h34TAQBNQULJwdjnrOJkVP_DZ1Jl2NQAQ6mfKeKEjGBxNTz7Snm1CLxDGFSI6M_8uvx_Lo4ntJkkr68sP0GFcBwLU9fJmD3/s1600-h/pirate%252520019%25255B4%25255D.jpg"><img style="background-image: none; border-bottom: 0px; border-left: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; display: inline; border-top: 0px; border-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px" title="pirate 019" border="0" alt="pirate 019" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg2VBN7r2zIIOY5ekk10TTGSVY-kSvg2QfKxMcDxf0cXtt9xeMfC-GZ53OsyqLKpJLdLcloj0uT_SMxgtK4zQrzTBb7ntoq5JcJzADnALaEJjy_MGIEuTTPEuJAJvd9Oy35r8ho07un6QEN//?imgmax=800" width="364" height="484" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgE5TkW43ev7m_Kd5HuOf0XIfsC7vOksV3yso6I-uNimF85ZKXW0Svzwcdv6OVtVu83A3cFUdvSQ5vZXqYP_GUqikcL0tt9nqnQ15oLeQsg4A4EOC_j_VFLTOLwoKOlWD9VdWNCr5Dx4Ppz/s1600-h/pirate%252520020%25255B4%25255D.jpg"><img style="background-image: none; border-bottom: 0px; border-left: 0px; margin: 0px 0px 5px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; display: inline; border-top: 0px; border-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px" title="pirate 020" border="0" alt="pirate 020" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgLJ7Ukmp-aqWVZYl89TrQTr6YJLiKiY8p_LSgQJZ68eYPkb_umErCy_tG_m89IhVAg1V1c7l8JlDWCu5Wz5Ldtvn2ClTWxdn6AdK0ZoX5JhvkYmeOpCja_vTL3HNHIEwx7es47kX2zT7h-//?imgmax=800" width="398" height="306" /></a></p> <p>And in the end….they had a GREAT time.</p> <p>He loved every minute of it.</p> <p>Needless to say….I felt like SUPERMOM.</p> <p>He had conquered his fear and overcome his insecurities.</p> <p>AMAZING.</p> <p>Then…..</p> <p>it happened….as it always does.</p> <p>It was MY TURN.</p> <p>This past Saturday the girls were going to be in the parade for <a href="http://www.thedanceco.com/">The Dance Company</a>.   They were OVER THE MOON.  They needed NO convincing.  It was awesome.  We were ready to go.   You see….I was going to be in the back.  Corralling kids.   I was there strictly for “behind the scenes” participation.  </p> <p>I was PLANNING on walking behind all the girls to make sure we were all together.  I was PLANNING on getting lost in the sea of little girls “pony-ing” their way down the middle of the street.  </p> <p>EASY PEASEY…right?</p> <p>Yeah right.</p> <p>Then I was the one who “got pressed”.</p> <p>I got there and at the very last minute they needed someone to walk IN FRONT and carry the sign.</p> <p>Like WAY IN THE FRONT…..of everyone.</p> <p>With. the. sign. that. everyone. looks. at.</p> <p>CRAP.</p> <p>Freakin” schooled AGAIN. </p> <p>I didn’t want to be uncomfortable.  </p> <p>I didn’t want to be “out of my comfort zone”.</p> <p>Again…CRAP.</p> <p>That is what I get for being all..”Put yourself out there.  It is good to be “pressed” into doing something you are uncomfortable with.”</p> <p>So…off  I went.</p> <p>Carrying the sign and WALKING the talk that I so love to talk.</p> <p>It was a great experience, it showed me that no matter how much we THINK we have grown….because of what we can SEE.</p> <p>The real growing happens so slowly that we are shocked when our “proverbial old clothes” don’t fit.</p> <p>We grow bit by bit.</p> <p>Experience by experience.</p> <p>Step by step</p> <p>Even if those “steps” are taken right down the middle of the flippin’ town, carrying a huge sign, in front of 1000’s of people.</p> <p>It also  taught me that no matter when or where God chooses to “press” us….</p> <p>young </p> <p>or </p> <p>old.</p> <p>If we choose to take those steps….</p> <p>We will be rewarded.</p> <p>If we choose to walk the talk…</p> <p>we will be MORE alive.</p> <p>And that will be evident in our lives….</p> <p>even when we are standing still.</p> <p>Live. Love. Laugh. Learn.</p> Janahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17681902597194726962noreply@blogger.com4