Truth and Honesty……

INTRODUCTION: I am going to be honest here….if you don't think you can handle it …STOP READING.

Maybe its the move.

Maybe its myfamilys health issues.

Maybe its “homeschool guilt”.

Maybe its ALL of it.

I don’t know.

I can’t put my finger on it.

But I am DEFINANTLY in a funk.

FEAR funk.

ANTICIPATION funk.

I don’t know.

The move has been RELATIVELY smooth.

If you don't count the UNhappy vacating renters we encountered

or

the “cleaning” of the old place.

AND there is SOOOO much to be thankful for.

and so much to look forward to.

But LOTS to do.

My HOMESCHOOL issues are silly.

I have TYPICAL “homeschool guilt” …because the schoolroom isn’t done yet and the kids are not on their NORMAL schedule.

They are fine.

Still smart.

BUT

My families health issues are my main focus right now.

I guess its FEAR.

Fear of the unknown.

Fear of the unexpected.

I find myself fearful.

I know I shouldn’t be…

BUT

I am.

I'm being honest.

I am.

I am scared of LIFE.

Its so fragile.

so FRAIL.

I tell people ALL DAY that GOD is in control.

I mean it…I tell people ALL DAY.

I KNOW HE IS.

But if I'm HONEST…

I say it for myself MORE that I say it for them.

I say it to REASSURE MYSELF.

To convince MYSELF.

Its the TRUTH.

And for the sake of INTEGRITY.

AND

Because I am trying to keep this blog as a “lifelong journal” of sorts…

I want it to be true and to not CANDY COAT things.

So there it is….

the TRUTH.

I am in a funk.

I am worried.

I am scared.

BUT…

I know that Jah will provide ALL THINGS NEEDED.

¹ The LORD is my shepherd, I shall not be in want.

² He makes me lie down in green pastures,
       he leads me beside quiet waters,

³ he restores my soul.
       He guides me in paths of righteousness
       for his name's sake.

⁴ Even though I walk
       through the valley of the shadow of death, ^[a]
       I will fear no evil,
       for you are with me;
       your rod and your staff,
       they comfort me.

⁵ You prepare a table before me
       in the presence of my enemies.
       You anoint my head with oil;
       my cup overflows.

⁶ Surely goodness and love will follow me
       all the days of my life,
       and I will dwell in the house of the LORD
       forever.