Deep.

I ran a bath and told the kids to read for 30 min and I set a timer.

I settled in with some parenting book that I brought in with me.

I figured I had 30 min to myself…well, 20 if I was lucky.

Kids….I sat thinking about how life was strange.

How did I get to THIS point in my life?

How did I get to a point where I have a bunch of kids that are growing literally in front of me.

How?

When?

WHY?

Why does it feel like days slip thru my fingers like sand while I desperately try and grasp them before they slip away?

Why does it feel like things are changing so fast that I am having a hard time “keeping up”?

Then I heard something…something. different.

I turned off the bathwater and listened carefully….

Someone was talking.

It wasn’t the kids.

It was a man…..in the house?

My heart started racing…..

I quickly jumped out of the bath and wrapped up in a towel.

I ran, still wet into the hallway and stuck my head into the living room….

all the kids looked up startled.

“What’s wrong Mom?  Why did you get out of the bath?” said Shasha.

I looked around the room confused.

I know I heard a MAN.

“I thought I heard someone talking….like a MANS voice.”

They all looked at each other and shrugged.

Then Zeek said , in a strikingly deep voice that I swear he didn’t have when I went into the BATH, “It was me Mom.  I was the only one talking.”

I stood there for a minute in total confusion.

That couldn’t have been Zeek…it was a MANS voice.

I looked again…..nope, he was the only one there.

It was happening….we were changing.  Right. before. my. eyes.

I slowly walked back to the bath a little more AWARE of just how quickly the sand is actually falling thru my fingers.

and

a little bit more desperate to keep days from slipping away.

Walkabout??? Already????

Wikipedia says that THIS is the definition of a walkabout:

"Walkabout refers to a rite of passage during which male Australian Aborigines would undergo a journey during adolescence and live in the wilderness for a period."

Well...as a parent of a man-child I knew that SOMEDAY one of the boys would want to go on some sort of "walkabout".

And ...as a Mother I always knew that I would NOT BE READY-whenever that day came!

And just as I'd imagined ...it happened last night.

Jay had a gig and Zeek stayed there with him to help the band load up the equipment, roll cords, break down drums, etc.

THIS is a hard transition for ME...but- he is getting older and NEEDS to gain some sort of independence. Sniff sniff. LOL.

He JUST started staying and helping in the last year.

The other kids used to complain with the TYPICAL responses of , "But, Mom!!!! I want to stay TOO!!!!!"

or, the ever lasting , "MOM!!!! Thats not FAIR!!!!!"

But, after a few discussions about how Zeek is the oldest so he will ALWAYS be the FIRST to do things...FOREVER. They usually quiet down.

When they keep arguing, I easiely shut their mouths with a quick, "I did not make THAT decision. If you have a problem with THAT ONE, you need to talk to GOD!"

Which of course...stops them in their tracks! LOL

So JUST THIS has been a slow transition for us all...the kids are growing.
we have kinda exited the baby stage...its time for some independance.

BUT...I was NOT PREPARED when they came home last night and PROPOSITIONED ME.

I promise you this was not a RANDOM WORK.

THIS was PLANNED.

They came to me in the kitchen.

Zeek under Jays arm.
UNITED.
They were there for a PURPOSE.

I'm not really sure how it started but ALL I REMEMBER are the words "Tennessee" and "reggae festival".

It was all a blur....
And the next thing I know was that they were trying to convince me that Zeek should be able to take his first "WALKABOUT".

In this situation the "walkabout" being: a reggae festival in Tennessee where they are camping by a river. Jay will be playing and Zeek will be "a roadie"....He will wave the flag on stage when Jay is playing..just like always. They will leave on Friday and return on Sunday.

As you can imagine..JUST the thought made my heart immediately start to beat faster and my mind race!

My answer: Ill have to PRAY on that one!!!

In my heart I know it is ok.
It is probably the BEST "Walkabout" a Rasta family could ask for.

So ...I guess it is time.

And everyone is doing EXACTLY what they are supposed to do.

The Father and Son are SUPPOSED to try and convince the Mother that IT IS "THE RIGHT" TIME.
And the Mother is SUPPOSED to feel that it could NEVER be "THE RIGHT TIME".

Good news folks....WERE RIGHT ON SCHEDULE!!!!!!!!!!!

Waaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!

Our "Baby"....Not any more! (Sniff)

Sheba Ithiopia Vallone.....A ROYAL name for a ROYAL girl.

Sheba has sucha sweet soul...She is a caretaker at heart.

She is very observative and ALWAYS knows JUST what someone needs.

She sits with Jay at night and rubs his head and says, " I Love you Daddy", and is ALWAYS first to get him ANYTHING he needs.

She has been growing up in front of our eyes lately...
It is HARD for me to believe that she is almost 4 years old!!!!
Our BABY????? Almost 4????
Couldnt be....
Shoulnt be....
Where did the time go????