Thursday, October 27, 2011

Tribal Mentality....


To the outside world, we all grow old. But not to brothers and sisters. We know each other as we always were. We know each other's hearts. We live outside the touch of time. - Clara Ortega

................................................................................................................
I'll never forget that hot summer day......in about 2008.

We had "snuck into" the Holiday Inn swimming pool in the middle of the day.

It was hot and we were determined to get a good hour in before someone caught on......which USUALLy took WAY less than an hour.

I mean.....We are a family of 6 with dreadlocks.

For some reason, BACK THEN...
we seems smaller
or 
less
or
calmer
or
SOMETHING.

The kids were 6,4,3, and 1.

THESE days...now that the kids are bigger, we dont even ATTEMPT to sneak in.

We would NEVER make it THRU THE GATE now.....they can sense us comming with our SWARM of kids and all their:
towels 
and 
goggles 
and 
sunscreen 
and 
dive sticks
and
LOUDNESS.

THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS NOW when we show up at a pool:

Me: How long do you think it will take babe?
Jay: 10 minutes.
Me: No way....they will be gone in 5!!!!


That is the converasation we have.
We call it "Rasta-vacate-itis".
That is when there are lots of people swimming and enjoying the pool...
THEN- We show up.
They see Jay and I and our 4 kids ...and before you know it- 

We
have
the
pool
to
ourselves!

Awesome.
It happens EVERYTIME.
Sometimes it takes aFEW minutes longer than others...but-
it
always
happens.

No matter what.

We have enjoyed MANY a day in our own PERSONAL hotel pool...because people were scared.

But this day....was BEFORE.
The kids were little and we were...smaller, I guess.

We were all swimming in the pool and Sheba(1) was sitting on the outside of the pool on the concrete.
A little boy started to "mess with her".
He was taking her toys and making her whine. Nothing serious...just kid stuff.
But what happened next will FOREVER be etched into my mind.
Malachi was about 3 and was in the pool swimming...but watching.
He saw what the boy was doing and swam to the edge.
Without a word he climbed out of the pool and stood between his little sister and "the outsider".
He took a karate stance with his hands in front of him.
Ready to defend.
He didn't SAY a word.
He didn't HAVE to.
The little boy retreated to the safety of his side of the pool and never returned.
Then...without a sound- Malachi got back in the pool.

I sat back and watched in amazement.
I was stunned at how, at SUCH A YOUNG AGE, the children KNOW.
They KNOW who is  "of their tribe".
They protect each other and consume each other to the point that they are willing to stand and defend EACH OTHER...without ever asking US for a thing.

AMAZING.

I will NEVER forget that.
EVER.


Then...sometimes as children get older they forget how VALUABLE and PRECIOUS they are to one another.

They forget to be GRATEFUL that God GAVE THEM built in friends and protectors.  

UNTIL.....
They are left ALONE.

Which is EXACTLY what happened to us this last weekend.

I was sick on Saturday and everyone left.
Shasha and Sheba went with their friends and Zeek and malachi had a football game.

So they all went they seperate ways.

Then Shasha got dropped off here at the house with ME.
ALL ALONE.
No other kids to play with.
Just SHASHAMANE...by herself.
It was TORTURE for her.
She had NO IDEA what to do with herself.
At one point she was LAYING ON THE FLOOR of the kitchen....moaning.

I could not help but remind her...every 5 minutes...they she should be GRATEFUL.

"What do you think your friends who are ONLY CHILDREN do???"

"Do you think they act like this????"
It was a day of reasoning...with Shasha.
I spent most of the  day talking to her about why she should be grateful for what she has.....because it is ENOUGH.

It is a blessing to HAVE brothers and sisters TO PLAY WITH.
By the end of the day...
ALL SHE WANTED WAS HER BROTHERS and SISTER.

A perfect lesson for a fussy "NOT-ONLY-CHILD".

Be grateful for what you have, because you never know what you have till it is gone.

Lesson Learned.
Mission Accomplished.