Knee Deep……….

 

I am in the trenches of parenting these days.

I mean KNEE-DEEP in tons of issues.

Half-way up SEVERAL mountains.

Facing down my fears and trying my hardest to keep my head above water.

My kids are growing up which means DAYS of sorting out feelings and LOVING them thru it.

Gone are the days of just “keeping them alive”….

Those were the days…nurse,sleep,change. Repeat.

No…..

Now we are going DEEP into the heart of the issues….in the muddy trenches.  Sifting thru a mess of changes.

Sticky places that shape them for LIFE.

It is EXAUSTING.

And most of time I feel like I am failing…..

Flailing on all fronts.  And not succeeding in ANY of them.

Some days go by with little or no drama.

Well…little or very little drama.

There are rarely days with NO DRAMA…who are we kidding???

And some days ROCK ME.

Some days I feel like if I have to referee ONE>MORE>FIGHT, answer 1 more question, cook 1 more meal, teach 1 more lesson, or solve 1 more problem….

I will FREAK .

And some days I do…..freak.

More often than you would believe …trust me.

But more than anything I am learning thru these days that I am growing up too.

I am learning new things about myself and my journey everyday.

I am learning that sometimes the lessons are more for me to learn than they are for me to teach.

They are reflections of me.

I guess that is life right?

We ALL grow.

We ALL change.

And we ALL get a new chance tomorrow.

Thank goodness that we get re-dos and make-ups.

And thank goodness that if we truly pay attention in this life we realize that…..

We

are

forever

HIS

children.

We are given these struggles and “trenches” …

because we NEED them.

We need to constantly examine and look inside.

We need to continually check ourselves.

If we don’t…..

We soon realize that….

The mud in the trenches is heavy and suffocating.

And if we don’t KEEP MOVING…

We are bound to get STUCK.