Sunday, November 20, 2011

Looking back…..

I am not good at this…

I was good at changing diapers and  nursing babies.

I am not good at letting them GROW UP.

I am not good at letting them venture off by themselves.

I am not good at the whole “independence” thing…it HURTS.

Not in the sappy “It hurts” way…more like a PHYSICAL PAIN.

Like my heart is “ACTUALLY BREAKING” kind of hurt.

It is like I am watching my life HAPPEN…without any say so at all.

I can’t stop it or change it.

ALL I can do is TRY and navigate THRU it.

All I can do is WATCH and try and learn.

THAT is what happened this weekend while we were with my Dad on vacation in Texas.

We went to the Yogi-Bear themed “Jellystone” campground  in Waller, Texas.


It was awesome….there were PLENTY of things to do with the kids.

Putt Putt

Water Slides

Petting Zoo

Swimming Pool



Outdoor Movies

Golf Carts

But…Best of all we were all alone …pretty much.

I kept thinking to myself, “This is AWESOME. It would be NUTS in Mid-July when EVERY campsite and cabin were filled. I LIKE IT THIS WAY.”


Then it happened.

A TRUCKLOAD of eight 10 year old boys showed up….and stayed at the cabin 3 doors down.


As you can imagine…our boys were ESTATIC.

Zeek immediately ran off to meet them, and Malachi was RIGHT BEHIND.

The funny thing is that Zeek is SOOOOOO SWEET and good natured that he has NO IDEA what he might be walking into.

I mean really…8 boys? what are the chances all these boys are going to be NICE.

Seriously…there is ALWAYS at least 1 BRAT in the bunch.

But …he doesn’t get that. He runs up with NOTHING but good vibes and intentions.

So ….I watch and listen.

“Hey!” Zeek said. “I have a GREAT idea.”

Then …JUST like I suspected, the BRAT of the bunch said, “No one CARES.”

But…Zeek isn’t phased a BIT…he keeps talking, putting himself RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE of the party.

He doesn’t hang back …..he jumps in.

Head first he DIVES in.

As I listen it takes EVERY bit of effort I have NOT to run over there and tell those kids that MY KID is amazing and sweet and CONFIDENT and COOL.

I want too…I really do.

But…lucky for me- Zeek doesn’t even hear him.  He just keeps talking. ALL CONFIDENCE…NO FEAR.

THAT …he gets from his DAD , I am SURE of. lol.

So…I do my best to hang back…I sit with my Dad and WATCH…from afar….which is SOOOO HARD for a “helicopter mom” like me.

I have a tendency to HOVER….just HANG around. there. in the background.

But…they kept telling me to let him go.

“He is growing up.”

“You HAVE to learn to let him go.”

blah blah blah


So this went on for a couple of hours….playing. listening.watching.

Then he wanted to go to the petting zoo …with the boys.

By himself……

I looked around for help…they said, "Let him go, it right there.”






And as I watched him walk off  with a group of boys I said to my Dad, “This is SOOOO hard. I can hardly STAND to let him go. What if they are mean to him? What if they are BAD KIDS? “

Then my Dad said something to me that made me LOOK BACK and reevaluate my whole childhood.

He said, “Do what I did…Let him get around the corner and then follow him.”




I felt like I had been given the “golden key”…..


Then he said something even better, “Or let me go and then he won’t THINK you are checking on him.”

So I did.

And he was fine… fact later that day, when all the OTHER BOYS went fishing, Zeek went with them.

And about 5 min later I see my Dad get a fishing pole and get on the golf cart.

About 30 min later ha came back WITH ZEEK and told us how all the boys were fishing and NOONE was catching ANYTHING.

Then Pawpaw showed up and took Zeek to the OPPOSITE side of the lake….he cast 1 cast and caught a fish.

Sweet. All the boys were watching NOW.

Then…he cast his 2nd cast…and caught ANOTHER fish!!!

Pawpaw said the other boys came running to THEIR side of the lake.

This made me think 2 things…

1.My kids have the best Paw Paw EVER!!!


2. Who is COOL NOW boys, WHO IS COOL NOW????

I love how GOD and PawPaw together serve the BEST REVENGE.



Anonymous said...

Inspiring...loving..caring..sweet..pure precious innocent love shared by mother and child. Blessed Love.

Dad said...

He is a fine boy. I know you are proud.