Thursday, September 10, 2009

Life Struggles........

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"Education develops the intellect; and the intellect distinguishes man from other creatures. It is education that enables man to harness nature and utilize her resources for the well-being and improvement of his life" Haile Selassie I

Sometimes I look around my life and think, "HOW did I get here?"

Its mindboggling to me to think about the GRACE of GOD.

How much GRACE and FORGIVENESS he has shown me.

From THAT to THIS.

From THERE to HERE.

As I sit in my new schoolroom with everything organized and in its place I am HUMBLED.

I am HONORED to be HERE.

I am BLESSED to be stressed oveer lesson plans.

THIS is a GIFT!

Maybe God gave me the DRIVE to take this JOURNEY because I needed it.

Maybe the children would THRIVE in any school.

I dont know.

I LIKE to think it is ME.

I like to think that God gave me these children KNOWING that they needed ME.

But........

The older I get and the longer I am EMMERSED in THIS- I think I was WRONG.

It was ME who needed THIS.

Maybe, just Maybe....I NEEDED to teach them.

Maybe I needed to HAVE to be organized, structured, and on time.

Maybe..THIS was the plan- ALL ALONG.

Funny...the things you THINK you would do differently if you had the chance.

Funny...The things you MIGHT change.

As I sit here in the ORGANIZED, CLEAN, STRUCTURED schoolroom....It hits me.

This is where I was headed all along.

This is where the journey has brought me.

This is MY CHANCE to make a difference in the world.

THIS is my Do-OVER...

This one is a daily struggle....

An "earthly" struggle...

Not the "get lots of attention" struggle.

Not the "immediate gratification" struggle.

Not even the "always appreciated" struggle.

But, In the end....

I am SURE that it is the "SO WORTH IT" struggle.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

Jana I'd love to hear how/what you did "differently" with your school room ie using a guest room/add on...what did you do differently this year from previously...one home school mom to another, every bit helps.

one love
dawn

Anonymous said...

love it Jana!

Mom said...

I am proud of you for working so hard and caring so much about the children's education. Keep up the good work.
Love you ALWAYS!!!
Mom

Marisa V. said...

you are the BEST, Jana! Always have been GOOD ON YOU and GOOD FOR YOU!!!!!
I love you~ mari

Anonymous said...

Wow Jana. You inspire me to be a better mom. I love to read your blog and thank you for sharing your courage to struggle and learn thought life.

Thank you,
Julie

Anonymous said...

Wow Jana. You inspire me to be a better mom. I love to read your blog and thank you for sharing your courage to struggle and learn thought life.

Thank you,
Julie