Wednesday, July 28, 2010


We(american girls) are WARPED.

We THINK that our worth is MORE if our thighs dont rub together.

We THINK that SOMEONE will love us MORE if we were 2 sizes smaller.

We THINK that others are looking at us WAY MORE than they are.

We THINK that if only our arms were "smaller" our DREAMS would come true.

We are so DUMB, and WARPED.

So preoccupied with OURSELVES.

So concered that what we HAVE isn't what we WANT.

Trust me....its an issue I have.

I know that MONSTER well.

I have fought him for years.

There was a time in my life(I was preggs with Zeek) that I was sooo busy FREAKING OUT about the weight that i was gaining that I was missing out on my LIFE.

I was so OBSESSED that one day when I came home from work Jay had taken white paper and COVERED EVERY MIRROR in the house. On the paper there were nothing but POSITIVE saying and affirmations.

It was AMAZING and it helped.

Just taking away the ROUTINE of looking in the MIRROR was a blessing.
After THAT...everytime I looked in the mirror all that was in front of me were POSOTIVE THOUGHTS.

It was a PERFECT SOLUTION to a STUPID problem.


Lately I have been fighting THAT monster again.

I think it has to do with the fact that I have been sick for about the last 6 months and havent really ben at my normal yoga/excercise level.

I FEEL like I have gained about 5 lbs.

I can tell.

And for some reason I let THAT affect how I feel from the OUTSIDE in.

Even though I KNOW that who I am comes from the INSIDE out.

And luckinly I have an amazing husband who siad something to me the other day that SHIFTED my thinking.

I was upset because I was "fighting" again. I just felt YUCK.

He noticed and came to me and said, "I Love yuo NO MATTER WHAT!"

And being the "smart" woman I am I said, "But you don't gain weight!"
(He has been the SAME since high school....SURFING maybe? LOL)

To this my WISE husband says " Give THANKS...we have food and aren't STARVING!" ....which of course SHIFTED my thoughts and made me feel like and UNGRATEFUL CHILD in the eyes of GOD.


after letting THAT sink in for about 2 days I watched a movie about the holocaust.

It was a graphic, sad movie.

A movie that makes you THINK.

It made me really THINK about how BLESSED I am.


I mean really????

As women shouldn't we just be GRATEFUl that we live in a LIFE where we CAN be "FLUFFY" instead of STARVING!

Shouldn't we GIVE THANKS for days when our clothes are TIGHT instead of HANGING ON.

Seriously.....We are BLESSED beyond belief and should be GRATEFUL for any "fluff" we are carrying!


turtle said...

oh yeah and the earth is big
mama earth is big sphere rotatin
on axis in space.... sure there are other planets some are larger
like the Sun some smaller like pluto
point is this
tv and all the mag all that stuff
warps the minds sending false message
for love the jay taping the mirrors
for that is somethin needed worldwide
Cause one must go beyond , to infinity and beyond just like buzz light year
big hug

MOM said...

Our family has always fought being "fluffy". It's really okay.
You just need to concentrate on being healthy.....ME TOO!!!
Hugs and Kisses - cannot wait to see all of you tomorrow night..MOM

Marisa Z. said...

You are always beaytuful!! A fantastic Mom, wonedrful wife, and a good friend, what more could someone ask for???? By the way I'm 34 weeks pregnant, 6 weeks to go. I'm not fluffy I'm just plain big and I LOVE IT!!! Love you, girl. Keep up the inspiring writing i love reading every bit of it!!~ Mari

Marisa Z. said...

BEAUTIFUL that is!!

Cindy said...

Jana, as others have stated: YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL just the way you are. I am so glad you are a part of my life, because knowing you makes my life richer and BIGGER!!! And that's a good thing. I love you, Aunt Cindy

Anonymous said...

Fluffy. I love it. Been fluffu all my life and never did appreciate it before today. Thanks baby.
Can't wait to see you and you beautiful family.

Juli Morman said...

WOW-I soooo Needed this! LOVE YOU!!! Can't wait to see you this week!!! XOXO-Juli